MENTAL HEALTH MONDAY
Why Cleaning Feels Impossible (And How to Break Free)
Hey beautiful souls, welcome back to Mental Health Monday on The Meredith Patterson Podcast.
I'm your host, Meredith Patterson—Broadway performer, wellness coach, and your guide to feeling whole in body, mind, and spirit.
Today, we're talking about something that might seem simple on the surface… but if you've ever stood frozen in front of a messy room, overwhelmed, ashamed, or even defeated—you know this isn't just about chores.
It's deeper. It's emotional. And trust me… you're not alone.
Let's talk about why cleaning your home can feel impossible—and the emotional reasons that are actually behind it.
I want to start by sharing a story from an article I came across recently.
A woman named Rachel stood in her living room, dishes piled up, socks scattered on the floor, guests coming over that night—and she couldn't move.
She told herself, "Just start somewhere."
And instead… she found herself scrolling on her phone, feeling like a total failure.
She wasn't tired. She wasn't lazy. There was no crisis.
So why couldn't she just… clean?
Well, the truth is, for so many of us, there are emotional blocks that make the mess feel so much bigger than it is.
Let's walk through five reasons why this might be happening to you—so we can shift the shame and start reclaiming peace in our space, and in our nervous systems.
🧠 1. You Were Taught That Cleaning Has to Be Perfect
If you grew up with criticism around cleaning—like "you missed a spot" or "that's not how you fold towels"—your brain didn't associate cleaning with success.
It associated it with not being good enough.
So now? If you can't do it perfectly, you freeze.
You might spend three hours organizing a drawer… while your sink is still overflowing.
That's not discipline. That's perfectionism wearing a productivity mask.
Here's your reminder: High standards are beautiful—but not if they're keeping you stuck.
🏠 2. Your Nervous System Doesn't Feel Safe at Home
If home didn't feel emotionally safe growing up—maybe it was chaotic, tense, or unpredictable—your body might not trust peace.
So even when it's quiet… you feel unsettled.
Your body is still bracing for the door to slam.
This isn't about logic. It's about your wiring.
And it's okay. You're not broken. Your nervous system just needs to learn that calm is safe.
💤 3. You're Exhausted from Taking Care of Everyone Else
You're the dependable one. The strong one.
You handle the appointments, the shopping, the chaos.
But when your nervous system is stuck in go-mode, even something like wiping down the counter can feel like climbing Mount Everest.
Responsibility doesn't mean running yourself into the ground.
You're allowed to rest. In fact—you have to.
🌀 4. You're Afraid of the Stillness
Ever reach for your phone, Netflix, or suddenly "need" to reorganize the junk drawer when things get quiet?
That's your nervous system avoiding stillness.
Because sometimes… peace doesn't feel peaceful.
Maybe silence used to mean tension or danger.
So now your body treats calm like a threat.
And until we feel safe in stillness… rest will always feel risky.
⚡ 5. You're Addicted to the Crisis
This one hit me.
If your life has always been full of urgency and adrenaline—your brain might actually crave chaos.
The calm of wiping down a counter? Feels boring.
But the rush of cleaning frantically before guests come? Euphoric.
That's not time management. That's survival mode.
And the truth is… you're not lazy.
You're just wired for urgency.
But you can rewire your nervous system to find joy in peace, and energy in gentle momentum.
So how do we break this pattern?
You start by getting curious about what's really going on under the surface.
You start by giving yourself compassion.
And you start by moving… just one gentle step at a time.
Even if that means picking up one sock.
Even if that means wiping one corner of the counter.
This isn't about having a spotless home.
It's about creating safety, clarity, and self-love in your space—because your home reflects your nervous system. And you deserve both to feel calm.
That's your Mental Health Monday.
If this spoke to you, please share it with a friend who might be feeling overwhelmed or stuck.
And if you're ready to explore your own unique rhythm, your cleaning style, or just need support in regulating your nervous system—I'm here for you.
Head to meredithpatterson.com or connect with me on social.
Until next time…
You are worthy. You are capable. And bliss is your birthright.
