Welcome to Touring History of the Only podcast where we revisit major historical
moments with the enthusiasm of a sleep -deprived Wikipedia editor. I'm Lane. - And I'm
Dave. It's April 29th, and today's timeline has everything. Saint and armor,
a dictator in a tox, riots in the streets, and a bear selling soda. So,
buckle up folks, we're ready. - Let's start with birthdays. Born today in 1899,
Duke Ellington, one of the greatest jazz musicians of all time. If cool had a
soundtrack, he composed it. That's right, Duke Ellington. Also born Emperor Hirohito,
the Emperor of Japan during World War II, and famous Mickey Mouse -wearing watch
wearer. He reigned for 62 years and never once got cancelled, which is impressive
considering, Well, you know everything and born in 1958 Michelle Pfeiffer Catwoman
proof that Catwoman can carry a whip and still seal your heart. Oh, that's right
Tony Montana's girlfriend. She was fabulous Let's start with a bang literally in 1429
John of Arc led French troops to victory at the Siege of Orleans Beans she Oh,
dear. That was a hot one. Yes. She was 17. 17?
I was still figuring out deodorant, and she was liberating cities in full armor. I
still haven't figured it out. Divinely inspired and criminally underrated on the AP
History Test. Yes. Speaking of history in 1945, on this day,
Adolf They're married Eva Braun, inside a bunker, surrounded by crumbling walls in
just hours before they both died. Wow, hell of a honeymoon. Honestly, it's the most
German wedding ever. Bleak, efficient, and nobody danced.
On to 1975, only 30 years later. Oh, that's right. In 1975,
the US began evacuating Saigon, Officially marking the end of the Vietnam War and
our bunker moment. It was chaos, helicopters on rooftops, desperation in the air.
Something's never changed, Lane. I know. And somehow, we still managed to frame it
as a strategic exit. That's right. Sure, like I strategically exited that freshman
chemistry final. Ho ho ho ho ho. And that was right around the time of 1992.
On this day in 1992, the Rodney King verdict was announced. The officers were
acquitted and Los Angeles erupted into five days of riots. Can't we all just get
along? I guess not. Thousands injured, billions in damage, and once again America
learned that justice is often delayed if it shows up at all. And yet we still ask,
why are people so angry? Spoiler, this. This is why. This is why. Well,
something a little cheerier, 2011, Prince William and married Kate Middleton in a
wedding that cost millions, millions and made zero policy changes. Two billion people
watched it, only two were actually invited. And one of them was Elton John, because
of course he was. They got married on two days, I thought they got married
yesterday. Well with the time zone change, it's split Split. That's right. I forgot
about the international date line. That's right.
1985 Coca -Cola aired its first ever polar bear ad. Doc. It was adorable, oddly
emotional and raised the bar for animal actors worldwide. Or those bears look chill.
But I guarantee they were jacked up on syrupy product placement. And speaking of ads
in 2010, Dave? - Yes, the old spice, the man your man could smell like.
Add one everything. It featured a towel -wrapped man, a horse, diamonds, and zero
logic. - It was the Shakespeare of body wash commercials. Look at your man.
Now back to me. Now realize how low the bar is. - Why don't you look like that?
And now let's talk about today's sponsor today's episode is powered by Rise Donuts
the pride of Wilton, Connecticut Small batch made fresh and better than most things
that happened in 1945. That's right. You've got brown butter You've got strawberry
glaze you've got donuts that make your therapist say Maybe we could just lean into
the carbs. Hmm. Rise isn't just a bakery. It's redemption with frosting Oh,
it certainly is Lane is Lane. Follow @RiseDoughnut and plan your pilgrimage. And yes,
bring a box and a backup box and maybe another box. Rise doughnuts because some
days history sucks, but your breakfast doesn't have to. That's right. Now, back to
the show. Dave, I don't know how to pronounce this. Is it Roger? It's the Sorens?
It's Roger. It's Roger. Okay. Back to the facts today. Or it could be Rodgets if
you're in Chicago. I don't know. Rogues. Rogues. That's right. Back to the facts.
Today in 1852, Roges the Sorus was published, or as I like to call it, a
compendium lexicon reference catalog or vocabulary tome. Is that what you call it?
I didn't know that. Big day for people who hate repeating themselves, or for people
who hate repeating themselves, who loathe, despise, detest, and abhor it. How do you
like that? That's right. You know who hated that? Willie Nelson. Willie Nelson hated
that. That's right. Country music legend Willie Nelson was born in 1933. Still
smoking dope. He's 92. Still tours. And somehow looks younger than Jay Leno.
And a smaller chin. At this point, we're not sure if Willie Nelson is human or a
renewable energy source. Wow. That's interesting. In 1946, the Tokyo War Crimes
Tribunal began. 28 Japanese leaders were tried for crimes against humanity in the
wake of World War II. Think of it as the sequel to Nuremberg. Except this time,
it's personal. That's right. Somewhat related. In 2004, Dave.
Well, the World War II Memorial opened in Washington, D .C. A long overdue tribute
to the greatest generation who ironically had to wait decades for their own monument.
>> It's beautiful, dignified, and not a single part of it is a touchscreen ad. >>
Wow, that's not gonna happen anymore. And finally, what happened in 2015? >> Well,
in 2015 on this day, NASA's messenger spacecraft crashed into Mercury after 11 years
in space. >> Who's driving that thing? Because after over a decade of collecting
data it said you know what I'm done and face planted into a planet honestly same
yeah so that was April 29th mutinies monarchs music legends meteor crashes and one
very handsome deodorant commercial why thank you thanks for listening to touring
history come back tomorrow where the mistakes are new but the snark stays absolutely
the same. Until then, stay curious, and fragrant, and stay historical.
Hysterical? Hysterical! Hysterically historical. Bye everybody! See ya!
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