LANE: Hey there, history enthusiasts! Welcome to another episode of Touring History, where we stroll through the museum of time with no admission fee. I'm Lane...
DAVE: And I'm Dave. Today is May 8th, 2025, and we've got a jam-packed tour of history for you today, folks.
LANE: That's right, Dave. May 8th is one of those days where history really outdid itself. Like when a chef puts too many toppings on a pizza, but somehow it still works.
DAVE: That's a terrible analogy, Lane, but I appreciate the effort. Let's dive into the historical buffet, shall we?
LANE: First up, let's talk birthdays. On May 8th, 1884, Harry S. Truman was born in Lamar, Missouri.
DAVE: Ah yes, our 33rd president. The "S" in Harry S. Truman doesn't actually stand for anything. It's just an "S." His parents couldn't decide between his grandfathers' names, so they just went with the letter.
LANE: That's the kind of commitment issues that usually prevent people from becoming president.
DAVE: Also celebrating birthdays on May 8th: Sir David Attenborough, born in 1926.
LANE: The man who's spent more time whispering near dangerous animals than anyone in history.
DAVE: His voice is so soothing that I've heard lions fall asleep mid-attack when he starts narrating.
LANE: And lastly, Enrique Iglesias was born on this day in 1975. The man who taught us that you can be a hero, baby.
DAVE: I remember when that song came out. I tried serenading my wife with it, and she asked if I was having some kind of medical emergency.
LANE: Should've stuck with the Macarena, Dave.
LANE: Moving on to our main event. On May 8th, 1945, Victory in Europe Day was celebrated, marking the end of World War II in Europe.
DAVE: Hold on, didn't we just say yesterday that Germany surrendered on May 7th?
LANE: We sure did, Dave. The Germans actually surrendered on May 7th in Reims, France, but the Allies decided to officially celebrate it on May 8th.
DAVE: So they essentially said, "Hey, biggest war in human history is over, but let's sleep on it and celebrate tomorrow." That's like winning the lottery and waiting a day to cash the ticket.
LANE: Well, they wanted Stalin to have his own surrender ceremony in Berlin. Politics, man. It's like high school, but with nuclear weapons.
DAVE: Millions of people celebrated in the streets. In London, over a million people partied in Trafalgar Square and outside Buckingham Palace.
LANE: In New York, two million people packed Times Square. Can you imagine? Two million people. That's more people than have ever laughed at one of your jokes, Dave.
DAVE: That hurts, Lane. That hurts real deep. But not as deep as World War II, which claimed over 70 million lives.
LANE: And on that sobering note, let's move on.
LANE: On May 8th, 1886, Coca-Cola was served for the very first time at Jacobs' Pharmacy in Atlanta, Georgia.
DAVE: Invented by pharmacist John Stith Pemberton, who originally created it as a medicinal syrup. Back then, it actually contained cocaine. Which, you know, explained why people were so productive back in the 1880s.
LANE: That's not historically accurate, Dave.
DAVE: No, but it's funny to think about. The drink sold for five cents a glass. Now you can't even buy the air in the cup for five cents.
LANE: Pemberton claimed it could cure morphine addiction, headaches, and impotence. So basically, it was the 19th century version of those emails that go straight to your spam folder.
DAVE: Except this one went on to become the most recognized brand in the world. So maybe we should be checking our spam more carefully.
LANE: On May 8th, 1978, Reinhold Messner and Peter Habeler became the first people to climb Mount Everest without supplemental oxygen.
DAVE: You know, I get winded walking up a flight of stairs with all the oxygen in the world.
LANE: Most people do, Dave. At the summit of Everest, there's only about a third of the oxygen available at sea level. Doctors had predicted that attempting the climb without oxygen would result in irreversible brain damage or death.
DAVE: Sounds like the kind of thing my doctor would say if I told him I was trying to climb Everest.
LANE: Your doctor says that when you tell him you're planning to climb the stairs, Dave.
DAVE: Harsh but fair.
LANE: On May 8th, 1984, the Soviet Union announced it would boycott the Summer Olympics in Los Angeles.
DAVE: This was basically payback for the U.S. boycotting the 1980 Moscow Olympics. It's like when my neighbor didn't invite me to his barbecue, so I didn't invite him to my pool party. Except with world-class athletes instead of overcooked hamburgers.
LANE: The Soviets claimed they were concerned about "anti-Soviet hysteria" and security issues, but everyone knew it was just Cold War tit-for-tat.
DAVE: The real losers were the athletes who trained their whole lives for a chance they never got. It's like practicing a joke for years and then being told you can't deliver the punchline.
LANE: Is that something you do, Dave? Practice jokes for years?
DAVE: You tell me, Lane. You tell me.
LANE: On May 8th, 2003, a record heatwave scorched parts of India and Pakistan, with temperatures reaching up to 122 degrees Fahrenheit.
DAVE: That's so hot that eggs don't just fry on the sidewalk—they arrive pre-scrambled.
LANE: Not how temperature works, Dave, but I appreciate the effort. The heatwave claimed over 1,000 lives. Climate extremes are no joke, which is why Dave should probably stop trying to make jokes about them.
DAVE: Fair point. I'm sweating just thinking about it, and I'm in an air-conditioned studio.
LANE: Alright folks, it's time for a short break. Stick around for more history after these messages.
LANE: History fans, have you ever wondered what the greatest invention of all time is? Some might say the wheel, others might say the internet, but I'd argue it's the doughnut.
DAVE: And not just any doughnut—Rise Doughnuts in Wilton, Connecticut, where history and pastry meet in perfect harmony.
LANE: These artisanal doughnuts are handcrafted daily in small batches, using techniques that would make Renaissance masters weep with joy.
DAVE: You know what I love about Rise Doughnuts, Lane? The creativity. They've got flavors like maple bacon, lavender lemon, and something called "The Wilton Way" that changed my life more than my first divorce.
LANE: That's quite the endorsement, Dave. Each doughnut is like a little work of art, except you can eat it and it actually tastes good, unlike that time I tried to eat a Picasso.
DAVE: You didn't... actually try to eat a Picasso, right?
LANE: It was a print, Dave, relax. Anyway, Rise Doughnuts uses only the finest ingredients—no preservatives, no artificial flavors, just pure doughnut perfection.
DAVE: It's like if history had a flavor, and that flavor was delicious. I don't know what that means, but I stand by it.
LANE: If you're in Wilton, Connecticut, you owe it to yourself to visit Rise Doughnuts. And if you're not in Wilton, Connecticut, well, it's worth the pilgrimage.
DAVE: And don't forget to follow them on Instagram @risedoughnut to see daily creations that'll make your mouth water more than Pavlov's dogs at a bell factory.
LANE: Rise Doughnuts—making history, one doughnut at a time.
LANE: And we're back. On May 8th, 1970, The Beatles released their final studio album, "Let It Be."
DAVE: Technically, they recorded "Abbey Road" after "Let It Be," but "Let It Be" was released later. It's like when you prepare a great comeback in an argument but only think of it on the drive home.
LANE: The album featured classics like the title track "Let It Be," "The Long and Winding Road," and "Get Back." It was produced by Phil Spector, which was a bit like letting a hurricane organize your closet.
DAVE: Paul McCartney was so unhappy with Spector's production that he later released "Let It Be... Naked" in 2003, which stripped away all the orchestration. It's like when you order a burger and then take everything off except the patty.
LANE: At that point, just eat a steak, Dave.
DAVE: The album came out a month after the band had already announced their breakup. Talk about awkward timing. It's like sending wedding invitations after you've already filed for divorce.
LANE: On May 8th, 1999, Nancy Mace became the first woman to graduate from The Citadel, the previously all-male military college in South Carolina.
DAVE: The Citadel had been all-male for 156 years until the Supreme Court forced them to admit women in 1996. It's like when my club finally allowed left-handed people to join, except with significantly more historical importance.
LANE: I don't think that's a thing, Dave.
DAVE: You'd be surprised about the anti-lefty bias in recreational shuffleboard.
LANE: Anyway, Mace went on to become a U.S. Representative for South Carolina. She literally went from breaking barriers to making laws. That's what I call a career trajectory.
LANE: On May 8th, 1980, the World Health Organization officially declared smallpox eradicated from the planet.
DAVE: Smallpox was one of the deadliest diseases in human history, killing an estimated 300 million people in the 20th century alone.
LANE: The last naturally occurring case was in Somalia in 1977. A Global immunization campaign that began in 1967 finally wiped it out completely.
DAVE: It's the first and only human disease to be completely eradicated. Although my doctor says my sense of humor should be next.
LANE: Your doctor might be onto something there, Dave.
LANE: On May 8th, 2018, President Trump announced that the United States would withdraw from the Iran nuclear deal.
DAVE: The deal, officially called the Joint Comprehensive Plan of Action, had been negotiated by the Obama administration along with several other world powers.
LANE: Trump called it "a horrible, one-sided deal that should have never been made." It's like when you agree to trade your dessert for someone else's vegetable, and then immediately regret it.
DAVE: I think it was slightly more complicated than that, Lane.
LANE: I'm simplifying for the audience, Dave. Keep up.
LANE: And finally, on May 8th, 2007, the Dow Jones Industrial Average closed above 13,300 for the first time in history.
DAVE: Back then, 13,300 seemed like a lot. Now it seems like pocket change. It's like when you find a $20 bill in an old jacket and remember when that could buy dinner and a movie instead of just half a movie ticket.
LANE: The economy is always changing, Dave. That's why they call it "dynamic."
DAVE: I thought they called it "depressing."
LANE: That too, sometimes. Well, that wraps up our historical tour for May 8th.
LANE: I'm Lane...
DAVE: And I'm Dave, reminding you that history doesn't repeat itself, but it does occasionally plagiarize itself and hope nobody notices.
LANE: That makes no sense, Dave.
DAVE: History rarely does, Lane. Thanks for touring with us, everybody! See you tomorrow!
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