Why insight doesn't create change, and why that isn't your fault
Most people who come to psychology are already insightful.
They know why they react the way they do.
They can trace patterns back to childhood.
They can explain their triggers in detail.
And yet, nothing changes.
They still freeze.
They still overthink.
They still react in ways they promised themselves they wouldn't.
This is usually the point where people turn on themselves.
They decide they're resistant.
Or lazy.
Or secretly unwilling to change.
But that conclusion rests on a misunderstanding of how change actually happens.
Insight lives in the thinking parts of the brain.
Change happens much further downstream.
Your nervous system does not respond to explanations.
It responds to signals of safety or danger.
You can understand perfectly why you panic in certain situations
and still panic.
Because understanding does not equal safety.
In fact, insight without regulation often makes things worse.
It gives the mind something to chew on
while the body remains alarmed.
This is why people can talk brilliantly about their trauma
while still being completely hijacked by it in daily life.
The system that learned the pattern
is not the system listening to your reasoning now.
And that doesn't mean you're broken.
It means you're human.
Real change tends to arrive sideways.
Through repetition.
Through safety experienced, not explained.
Through relationships that don't demand performance.
Insight can help orient you.
It can stop you blaming yourself.
It can give language to what was once chaos.
But it was never meant to do the heavy lifting alone.
If understanding hasn't changed you yet,
it doesn't mean you've failed.
It means you've been asking insight
to do a job it was never designed to do.
