Episode 3
Have you ever had a doctor look at you and say, "What do you want us to do?" - and realized nobody's asking what Mom actually wants?
In this episode, Shannon Calles shares her personal story of being told "it's up to you" when her mother was on life support in 2006 and the framework she now uses to help adult daughters navigate impossible medical decisions with clarity and peace.
When your parent can no longer speak for themselves, the weight of medical decisions falls on you. It's one of the loneliest, most terrifying responsibilities you'll ever carry. But you don't have to figure it out alone.
IN THIS EPISODE, YOU'LL LEARN:
• How to discover what your parent would actually want (even if they never wrote it down)
• The exact questions to ask doctors to get truth instead of pressure
• Why the question isn't "What do I want?" but "What would Mom want?"
• How to honor your parent's wishes even when it breaks your heart
• Why guilt isn't a sign you made the wrong choice
• The 3 things you need to make decisions you can live with
Shannon walks you through:
✓ Finding clarity on what your parent valued most
✓ Getting truth-telling from the medical team
✓ Giving yourself permission to choose comfort over treatment
If you're facing feeding tube decisions, DNR/full code questions, hospice vs. treatment, hospital discharge pressure, or any high-stakes medical choice - this episode will help you find the clarity you need.
RESOURCES MENTIONED:
• POLST (Physician Orders for Life-Sustaining Treatment)
• Advance Directive
• Living Will
• DNR (Do Not Resuscitate)
• Palliative Care Consultation
WEEKLY MANTRA:
"I honor my parent by honoring their wishes - not by carrying guilt that was never mine to carry."
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Want to hop on a call to discuss your situation and what your options are?
In a call together, I will help you understand where things are at with your parent, what options you have available to you now and in the future, resources available, and how I can help you.
Resources & Links
📧 Book an Urgent Consultation:
If you're in crisis—hospital discharge, decline, dementia, confusion—Shannon can help.
📱 Connect with Shannon:
📖 Read the Full Show Notes Here:
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DISCLAIMER
This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical, legal, or financial advice. Always consult with qualified professionals when making decisions about senior care, medical treatment, or legal matters.
Next Episode Preview: We're tackling another tough caregiving reality that no one talks about enough. Subscribe now so you don't miss it.
Until then—be gentle with yourself. 💙
