What really causes estrangement between parents and children, and how can you prevent it, especially after divorce?
In this episode of The Moving On Method, host Michelle Dempsey-Multack sits down with psychotherapist and author Whitney Goodman (aka @sitwithwit) to unpack the nuanced emotional dynamics that lead to parent-child estrangement.
From parentification to narcissistic family systems, Michelle and Whitney explore what it takes to be the safe, emotionally attuned parent your child needs, particularly when co-parenting in a high-conflict situation.
What You’ll Learn:
Why estrangement is becoming more openly discussed, and what’s actually driving it
How parentification harms children (even when well-intentioned)
The critical difference between protecting vs. over-sharing with your child
How to build emotional safety and connection during divorce or co-parenting
What “parenting without a roadmap” really means, and how to do it with confidence
Episode Highlights:
03:44 – Is estrangement really on the rise, or are we just talking about it more?
08:29 – The difference between abandonment and emotional cutoffs
13:52 – Why parents repeat unhealthy dynamics or swing too far in the other direction
19:41 – How to avoid parentifying your child during divorce
26:35 – “My child is my rock”: When closeness crosses emotional boundaries
31:18 – What to say when your child repeats something the other parent said
34:50 – Can you be a “safe parent” even if you can’t control the other home?
37:11 – Parenting through estrangement fears: What conscious parents need to hear
Meet the Guest:
Whitney Goodman, LMFT, is a licensed psychotherapist, speaker, and author of Toxic Positivity. Best known for her online presence as @sitwithwit, Whitney helps individuals navigate family estrangement, generational trauma, and emotionally mature parenting through her work at callinghome.co.
Tools, Frameworks, and Concepts Mentioned:
Parenting Without a Roadmap – Whitney’s emotional navigation model for parents without healthy templates
Parentification – A breakdown of the emotional role-reversal between parent and child
Narcissistic Family Systems – Traits and long-term impacts
Emotional Maturity vs. Emotional Oversharing – Why kids need honesty with boundaries
Safe and Stable Parent Model – A guiding principle for high-conflict parenting
Closing Insight:
"Bad parents don’t worry about being bad parents. Conscious ones do."
Being afraid your child will resent you one day is a sign you’re already trying to parent with awareness. But trying isn’t enough; you need tools, insight, and support.
Get Michelle's courses on navigating divorce and co-parenting: https://bit.ly/MDMPodStore
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LINK TO TRANSCRIPT: https://transcripts/moving-on-method-ep257-parentification-estrangement
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