Did you have a difficult relationship with your mother? If so, then those issues may have an impact on your own mothering process. Today’s show address this topic and gives information that can be valuable in the healing process and applicable to the experiences held in this vital relationship between mother and child.
Crystal Clancy, LMFT, has a private practice specializing in perinatal mental health. She is one of the founding members of Pregnancy and Postpartum Support MN, which is the Minnesota State Chapter of PSI. She has been a PSI State Coordinator for 5 years. She is married and the mother of a son and a daughter.
Show Highlights:
How Crystal had a difficult relationship with her mother that intensified when her daughter was born and she encountered postpartum depression
Crystal noticed the common theme in her clients of a difficult mother relationship, which can also apply to a father
Factors to consider when examining a difficult relationship with a parent
The problems when a parent is centered and focused on their own needs over those of their child
The difficulty in mothering when you had a difficult relationship with your mother usually manifests itself after your baby is born
Sometimes a healthy level of attachment hasn’t been realized and the mother goes to one extreme or the other, either detaching or going overboard with care and control
A big step a new mom can take: find someone in your “village” or a professional who validates your feelings
Why new moms can feel ungrounded and unsettled
Depression and anxiety may be more common for these women due to shame, guilt, and lack of quality support
How Crystal helps women and teaches them to find the goal in the parent/child relationship
Scripted responses to use to say to a mom that can rewire self-talk
The grief that never ends, over the fact that you didn’t get the kind of mom you wanted and deserved
Accept that your parent is not capable of giving what you needed and not because of who you are
What Crystal has seen with moms reclaiming themselves
The intricacies of the healing process to empower and come through with resilience
Tools and resources that can help:
Will I Ever Be Good Enough? By Karyl McBride
Children of the Self-Absorbed by Nina Brown
The value of writing therapeutic letters
The Little Shaman Healing (youTube.com)
Other Resources:
www.irisrepro.com
Find Crystal on Facebook: @irisrepro or @ppsupportmn
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
