In today’s episode we read Chapter 13 – Love, Dad - in which Magpie reads a letter from her estranged father.
Brought to you by: Phaeton Starling Publishing and Things with Wings Productions.
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Author/Producer: Melissa Oliveri - http://www.melissaoliveri.com
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All music by Cannelle - http://www.cannellemusic.com
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FULL TRANSCRIPT:
Things with Wings Productions presents: Episode 13 of The Skylark Bell, Wingspan. I am your host, Melissa Oliveri.
In our previous episode, Mrs Phaeton paid a visit to Carnifex House, and broke the sad news to Magpie that her father had passed away.
In today’s episode we read Chapter 13 – Love, Dad - in which Magpie reads a letter from her estranged father.
Now, it’s time to settle in… grab a blanket, and a warm drink… and let’s get started.
Magpie feels a lump in her throat and a heaviness in her stomach as she watches the car pull away. It was a difficult goodbye, knowing she wouldn’t see her mother for the better part of a year. She watches as the car disappears around the bend, a single tear winding its way down her cheek, then turns around to walk back into the quiet, empty house.
Lucas is at the Caretaker’s Cottage working on the roof, which sprung a leak during a rain storm the night before. Lucky for the Sarcelles he and Magpie had been doing a daily check on their house.
Magpie wanders aimlessly from room to room, echoes of the time spent with her mother over the past week playing in her mind. She can still see them sitting at the dining room table enjoying an early breakfast before taking a morning walk down to the beach. She pictures her mother curled up in a blanket by the fireplace as they chat about art, music, life. She can hear echoes of laughter as they sat out on the little patio, a fire gently roaring in the fire pit, or the sound of pots and pans and dishes as they prepared a glorious pasta dish and mocha cupcakes for their last dinner together the night before.
Magpie heaves a sigh. Having circled the main floor, she walks slowly up the stairs to the bedrooms. The sunlight filters through the sheer curtains in the window of the room Mrs. Phaeton had stayed in, creating a shaft of light on the bed where she and Magpie had sat when she broke the news to Magpie that her father had passed away, and handed her a letter he left behind.
Magpie lays her hand against the pocket of her jeans. She’s been carrying that letter every day since her mother handed it to her. Placing it in her nightstand drawer before bed and slipping it back into her pocket after getting dressed each morning. She hasn’t been able to bring herself to break the seal and read the words written by the father she never knew. But now, in this quiet, empty room filled with the comforting warmth of the sun and the fragrant smell of the wildflowers in the vase next to the bed, she feels like it is time.
Magpie walks across the room and looks out the window at the sea, sparkling as the sun’s rays tickle the water. It is an absolutely perfect early fall day. She cracks the window open, letting in a light breeze that sends the sheer curtains billowing like two small ghosts tethered to the curtain rod. She takes a few steps back and pulls the letter out of her pocket before sitting on the edge of the bed. With her finger, she gently traces the letters of her name written on the envelope. A tear falls on the paper, creating a star shape as the ink runs in the top corner of the letter M. Magpie wipes her eyes roughly with her palm before turning the envelope over and slowly breaking the seal. She exhales heavily, suddenly realizing she has been holding her breath.
She gingerly slips the letter out of the envelope and unfolds it. Pressing the page down on her lap to flatten out the creases. She holds it up to the sunlight, taking in the rows of letters and spaces that, when put together, compose her father’s final message to her. “You can do this,” she says out loud, the words echoing in the empty room. She takes one more deep breath and starts reading.
My sweet Magpie,
I have been staring at this blank page for days. So many times, I have thought about what to say to you, and the words just never seemed right. I find myself at the point now where there is no time left for me to sort it out, so I will do my best to convey my message and hope that you will also be able to grasp all that is not written.
The first thing I need to do is tell you I love you. The second is that I am sorry. I am sorry for all that I missed. I am sorry for making you think I never wanted to be with you, to get to know you… I am sorry because that couldn’t be further from the truth. If I’m honest, I simply felt that I was not worthy, that being in your life would make it worse, not better. As I write this, I am looking at a stack of unsent birthday and holiday cards and gifts, things for a tiny little girl, things for a teenage girl, and things for a woman. Things I could simply never find the courage to send. All those years lost, but you were always on my mind, every single day. I will pack these cards and gifts and make sure they find their way to you somehow.
I have written your mother her own letter, but it is important for me that you know that she and I loved each other deeply, and hurt each other deeply, but I bear her no ill will and I have absolutely no regrets about my relationship with her, because it brought you into the world, and you are a bright, shining light.
I don’t have any amazing stories to tell, I have lived a simple life. I never remarried, I worked a steady job and lived in the same one-bedroom apartment in the city. My belongings are of no interest, I have nothing that would be meaningful to you, no mementos or awards or family jewels. All I can leave you are the following words of advice, which come directly from my heart.
If you love someone, tell them. Don’t wait. Time is the most precious thing in the world. No one can be sure there will be a tomorrow. Spend time with those you love. I can’t tell you the tremendous regret I feel that I never spent time with you, the person in the world I love the most. I always thought there would come a day when we would be reunited, but here I am, out of time. How I wish I could go back and change things, tell your mother just how much I loved her, and love her still. Things would have been so different.
The last and most important thing is this, my dear Magpie. If your life doesn’t work out the way you hoped, if it is thrown off track by loss, or unexpected change, don’t let your heart grow hard. Don’t become bitter or angry or vengeful. Don’t hold on to those feelings, they will not serve you well. Try to find a place of acceptance, and a path forward. There is always a chance for a bright, happy future, no matter how dark things seem at any given moment. Everything finds its way in time. I wish I had learned that much earlier.
If ever you feel lonely, or scared, just think of me, and I will be there. I will be there will all my heart, holding you, whispering comforting words in your ear. Just listen for me.
I wish you love, happiness, light, and all the time in the world.
Fly high, sweet bird.
Love,
Dad
Magpie lays the letter next to her on the bed on a small patch of sunlight, the tears streaming freely down her face.
“I’m home!” she hears Lucas’ voice downstairs, quickly followed by the sound of his footsteps coming upstairs.
“I’m in here,” she says, the words coming out of her sounding odd, her throat tight with grief.
Lucas walks into the room, his face filled with concern. “Magpie, are you okay?”
Magpie falls into his arms, letting his warmth radiate through her. They stay silent for a moment, then Magpie steps back to look into his face. “I love you, Lucas,” she says quietly.
“I love you too, Magpie,” he replies softly. They smile at each other, relieved to finally express the feelings that had been building up for years. Lucas slips his hand into his pocket, feeling the small feather ring he’s been carrying around every day for years. “Tomorrow, tomorrow I will give it to Magpie, tomorrow I’ll ask her to marry me,” he thinks, basking in the glowing feeling of joy washing through him.
Magpie leans her head on Lucas’ shoulder, relishing the feeling of warmth and safety that has settled in her chest. Her father’s words of advice echo in her mind, “Don’t wait, time is the most precious thing in the world, no one can be sure there will be a tomorrow...”
Thank you so much for listening. Join me next week for Wingspan chapter 14, Swan Dive, in which Lucas explores the land surrounding Carnifex House and the town of Pòcaid with Cormorant, and is shocked to find a familiar item in a small antique shop.
Before I go, I’d like to thank Phaeton Starling Publishing for this fantastically eerie story, as well as Cannelle for composing eerie, mood-setting music for this podcast.
If you are enjoying this story, please consider leaving a rating or a review, they’re both greatly appreciated. You can also support my work through a donation via your podcast provider or by subscribing to my Patreon where you get early access to episodes as well as MP3 downloads of the music, artwork, writing, recipes, and more! Checks the show notes for links.
Thank you.
