Host Laura speaks with guest Talida in this episode of Unexpected Turns. When Talida and her husband welcomed twin girls into their family, they looked forward to imparting both their faith and the rich culture of New York City. But an autism diagnosis for one of the girls interrupted their dreams. Talida tackled the challenge as a devoted, studious mother and shared notes on dealing with autism with extended family members. Then a close family member died by suicide with no advance warning, and Talida struggled with a hidden grief she didn't feel free to share with others. When her second daughter also faced developmental delays and was also diagnosed with autism, Talida emerged from a grief fog and sought help for her second daughter.
Talida shares how the timing of these trials together caused and still at times causes negative emotions to spiral. As she and her husband have grieved together, they have sensed God's presence in the pain. Talida has focused on replacing God's truth with lies, such as blaming herself for her mother-in-law's death or her daughter's diagnosis. She has found she can bring dark lies to light in the context of God's character and the support of safe community.
Talida encourages those dealing with an autistic child to dig for the fears and struggles behind their behaviors so parents can uncover needs. "Study your child. Be an expert on your child's strengths"---instead of focusing on their deficits. Talida adds, "All of God's children really are wonderfully made."
In dealing with the loss of her family member, Talida shares that she and her husband were helped when the loss was acknowledged straightforwardly and empathetically. Talida also found the physical pain of long-distance running has helped her cope with emotional pain. "This life is painful and temporary," Talida says. "We embrace the suffering because we know Who holds the key to our eternity."
Sharing her story has helped Talida own up to lost expectations, realize her own brokenness and see God's presence in the messiness. She has also found that sharing her story has helped other people open up about their own hardships. Read Talida's story Autism, Grief and Hope to find out more.
What stories are waiting to be discovered in your women's ministry or small group? Schedule a Sacred Story Retreat to find out!
