Cindy Esliger explores regret, the unpleasant emotion we’d rather forget about that can actually help us grow and gain clarity. Regret isn’t a sign that something is wrong with us; it’s actually a sign that things matter to us. It alerts us to something that didn’t align or that still needs our attention. So if we learn to acknowledge regret, it can be a catalyst for transformation. Cindy offers insight into defining, understanding, and dealing with regret so it can become a useful tool in career advancement.
Regret tends to be quite uncomfortable, so we avoid revisiting it. However, there are consequences to not reckoning with our regret, and Cindy identifies four of them: 1. Career stagnation, 2. Chronic dissatisfaction, 3. Low self-trust, and 4. People-pleasing paralysis. Cindy points out that when we dare to examine our regrets, we can turn them into strategic fuel for career growth. She names three ways we can start: 1. Reflect on past regrets, 2. Anticipate potential future regrets before making a decision, and 3. Recognize the lessons in our regrets.
Author Dan Pink identifies four kinds of regrets: foundation regrets, boldness regrets, moral regrets, and connection regrets. Understanding these can help us realize that regret does not necessarily point to something done wrong, but rather that something was challenging or we were at a crossroads. Cindy shares five powerful ways to harness the value of regret without getting stuck in it: 1. Use the future self test, 2. Sort the decisions that actually matter, 3. Reframe mistakes as data points, 4. Set our own bar, and 5. Practice self-compassion. The goal is to work with our regrets instead of against them.
Resources discussed in this episode:
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Contact Cindy Esliger
Career Confidence Coaching: website | instagram | facebook | linkedin | email
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