In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, Selene shares the story of surviving a possessive and controlling marriage complicated by her husband’s deeply enmeshed relationship with his mother.
After becoming pregnant, Selene discovered that her partner had lied about his marriage and soon found herself financially dependent, isolated, and living inside a family system where boundaries were constantly violated. Her husband resented the attention she gave their children, monitored her whenever she left the house, controlled access to money and basic necessities, criticized her appearance, and used anger and intimidation to keep the family walking on eggshells.
Selene also describes protecting her children, living in her car, returning to the relationship, reaching out to abuse services, and eventually filing for divorce. Although the harm continued through child neglect and unpaid support, Selene rebuilt her independence, returned to her hometown, became an author and public speaker, and created a life her former husband never believed she could build.
It's a story of coercive control, financial abuse, possession, enmeshment, emotional incest, toxic mother-in-law, jealousy, isolation, neglect, intimidation, verbal abuse, putdowns, physcial abuse, sexual coercion, monitoring a partner, surveillance, clothing control, appearance-based abuse, body shaming, name-calling, rage, walking on eggshells, trauma bonding, intermittent reinforcement, cycle of abuse, guilt, victim playing, gaslighting, reality distortion, rebuilding after domestic abuse, and agoraphobia.
*** CONTENT WARNING - This episode discusses adult physical abuse and strangulation. ***
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Click on the title to read about Coercive Control as Care: Signs & Patterns
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