Email: jnj.peoplearetheworst@Gmail.com
Who's your historical piece of ass? Have you ever even thought about it? King Tut up the butt? Vanna White on your pipe? Dr. Seuss making you loose? Buzz Aldrin eating your cauldron? I'd consider bending Jack the Ripper over against his will. After I was done, right above his butthole, I'd slap on a scratch and sniff sticker that said "Grape Job!". It would be 100% accurate, and YouTube approved. Be careful dipping your wick, or spreading that salmon throughout time! Flux capacitors don't magically cure the herp. Slip on a jimmy, use dental dams, wrap a rosary around your balls, whatever the fuck you have to do! Don't you wish history class would have been like this? If I ever decide to give up on life, I'll get my teaching license and tell my students all of this bullshit. The class presentations will be spectacular.
