They don't call him the King of Cunt-tree for nothing. George could have a whole national forest of one-hitter-quitter labia redwoods, some of them old enough to be petrified by now. He just had it like that, though. No tricks, nor no real strategy needed. Fast forward to modern times, and now we have Mr. Johnson displaying how the game has changed. These days, you need every advantage you can get. The easiest way is to achieve at least 2 of the big 3. Good looks, fame, and money. If you don't have at least 2, then you need to implement some other methods, such as in "Half a Song". It's easier to pick up a girl in a heightened emotional state, and it's always way better to get a lap dance from a crying stripper. There's a song about that shit too, if you don't believe me. "Oh no, you're trying to quit smoking, your boyfriend broke up with you, and your Father just died!?" Fucking BINGO!!! Merry Christmas, don't forget to leave arsenic laced cookies out for Santa. On Christmas morning, you'll either find a dead burglar in a Santa suit, or you'll know which one of your kids is the least trustworthy, and you'll have one less present to buy next year.
