Being a stepparent is tricky. How do you get involved in your stepchildren’s lives without overstepping? How do you go about disciplining a stepchild? How do you approach the holidays? Stepfamilies do have their benefits but taking on the role of a stepparent is never going to be easy. On the bad days, it can feel like you ‘set your hair on fire, and you’re trying to put it out with a hammer.’
Jean McBride is a marriage and family therapist in Northern Colorado who has helped more than 20,000 families navigate divorce. She has spent the past 11 years specializing in post-divorce relationships, which encompasses parenting during and after divorce, remarriage and stepfamilies. Jean serves as a divorce coach trained in the Collaborative Divorce model as well as a speaker and consultant in the area of divorce and remarriage. She is the author of Encouraging Words for New Stepmothers and Talking to Children About Divorce.
Today, Jean joins Katherine to share her take on why the role of stepmother is the most complex. She explains the difference in societal expectations for mothers and fathers, discussing how those expectations impact stepmoms and stepdads. Jean walks us through some of the common mistakes made by new stepparents and the ongoing discussion a new couple should have with regard to parenting. Listen in to understand the concept of diplomacy within a stepfamily and learn how to approach the holidays in a way that makes everyone feel welcome and equal.
Topics Covered
The complexity of taking on the role of stepmother
The challenge for stepmothers to be involved without overstepping
Jean’s advice for new stepparents
Take it slow
Let biological parent lead
Why it can be simpler for stepfamilies if both adults have children
How the societal expectations for fathers impact stepdads
The common mistakes made by stepfathers
The ongoing discussion a new couple should have about parenting
Expectations
Parenting style
Communication
Discipline
The concept of diplomacy within a stepfamily
How to make stepchildren feel welcome during the holidays
The value in establishing new holiday traditions
Mixing biological and stepparents at holiday celebrations
Jean’s guidance for stepfamilies
Manage expectations
Get help (i.e.: books, online resources, life coach)
Connect with Jean McBride
Jean’s Website: www.divorcehelpforparents.com
Resources
Encouraging Words for New Stepmothers by Jean A. McBride: amazon.com/Encouraging-Words-Stepmothers-Jean-McBride/dp/0970772912
Talking to Children About Divorce: A Parent’s Guide to Healthy Communication at Each Stage of Divorce by Jean McBride: www.amazon.com/Talking-Children-About-Divorce-Communication/dp/1623156858
Connect with Katherine Miller
The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
Email: katherine@westchesterfamilylaw.com
Call (914) 738-7765
