As the condensation drips off of my once frosty glass of rum and Dr. Popz. I wonder where my mail is. It's usually here at noon before I come home for lunch. I say to myself, "it's just late." It gets to be 7:30pm. The mail is still not here. I look again at the tracking on a package that said, it was out for delivery today. The tracking link says it was attempted to be delivered and there is a notice. I proceed outside to look for a notice. Not only no notice but, no mail. I am furious. I decide to call the postal hotline. There is a wait of a half and hour. I decide to wait it out. After forty minutes I hang up. I decide to make this mixtape. During the process I think. What if nobody got mail? What if the mail carriers said, "fuck Amazon and, their fulfillment center in Cleveland, Ohio, fuck WalMart, cuntity fuck, fuck this shit. No more mail. They can't fire us all." A collapse of the delivery system. UPS has given up too. Even the once deliverers of cashed checks for the Federal Reserve FedEx have decided, we are done. Let the cards fall where they may. My mail and package are burning outside of a local bar while the postal worker drinks shots of vodka and attempts to buy marijuana. Well, then I would rejoice, instead of being furious with the customer service department of the US Postal Service. Enjoy this mixtape. It may be the start of a revolution. Not the mixtape, the postal worker.
Tune in and, don't drop out,
Dj Lipton
P.S. Can I get my records tomorrow?