[see full LYRICS below and hear joerxworx's wonderful saxophone addition here: http://kat330.bandcamp.com/track/nice-to-be-naughty-featuring-joerxworx-on-saxophone ]
Kim of My Hot Air Balloon challenged me to do Eartha Kitt's "I Wanna Be Evil." As much as I enjoy Kitt's delightful performance here https://youtu.be/SS02GeKuWQ4, the lyrics didn't speak to me enough to cover it. Instead I wrote a nice vs naughty piece of my own and deliver it atop Earle Hagen's own composition duality: His song of innocence being the Andy Griffith Show Theme (on which Earle whistles as well), followed by a most sultry song of experience, his magnificent Harlem Nocturne (a fave song of mine of all time!).
The opening also contains snippets from my Waltz to a Wood Thrush intro for a later von Trapp allusion and, just so it wasn't a 100% spoken word performance, I also recorded a track of me vocalizing to the two Hagen melodies as an echo in the background. The HN version I used here is performed by Johnny Otis and orchestra, and the glorious blat of chord separating nice from naughty is from the final two-minute mark or so of Gershwin's Rhapsody in Blue.
I consider this a "first draft" in the hopes some blues-jazz musician in the SC community will compose a steamy 2:25 (or so) piece tailor-made for my second section naughty lyrics, either also to go beneath my already spoken recording, or even better, with a melody line to match my lyrics so I can actually sing the second part. It should be in a key that works with both my Waltz melody (which I'd use alone under the "nice" spoken section for an all-original version) and especially with that Gershwin segue chord (or provide a new blat chord of your own :).
I had fun with the wordplay in these lyrics and hope you all enjoy both sides now! xxxooo [Nice2bNaughty 'toon by JT Lindroos]
Nice to Be Naughty by Kathleen Martin © 2016
Like the driven snow
I have always been pure.
Polite as Miss Manners.
So mild and demure.
More femme than fatale
On a path that is narrow.
More prim than low-brow
As straight as an arrow.
I colored within the lines,
Kept my ankles crossed.
Listened to my elders,
Content to be bossed.
Yes, I've always...
Dotted my I's
Crossed my T's
Minded my Q's
And also my P's
But in the innuendo,
It's my asterisk! *
I'll shut my von Trapp now to
Break it down for you like this:
I'm gonna ...
Embrace the whole Eartha
Full caboodle and Kitt!
Clad in skintight clothing
Become the girl that is "It"!
I'll be lovably wicked
From my purrs to my growls,
Scratching all my itches
On my wildKat prowls!
I'll take off my specs,
Loose my mane from its bun.
I'll be a credit to my sex
And I'll be second to none!
I'll be good to the boner
With variety and spice.
A mumbler and a moaner
More naughty than nice!
Hooching my coochie,
Grinding my bumps.
Wooging my boogie,
I'll shimmy my lumps!
In amazing disgrace
I'll fly high my freak flag.
Buy a merkin in case
My carpet needs a good shag.
Hooching my coochie,
Grinding my bumps.
Wooging my boogie,
I'll shimmy my lumps!
I'll trade in my harp
For some down & dirty sax.
I'll kick out all the jams
And be ballin' some Jacks!
