This episode is brought to you by Relay, the app that helps you find healing and make progress alongside peers who get it. If
you are in a group and need a resource to help you support each other every day, check out Relay! Go to www.joinrelay.app and use our promo code PV2023 to try it out for free.
Welcome to episode #144! This week, Matt and Braden share what lacked in their own motivations when they were trying to get free from porn and what they've seen be effective in walking with many others.
Motivation has to be on a heart level, not just a head level
Knowing that pornography is bad is often an initial reason for wanting to quit. However, its often not enough. Identifying motivating factors that are on a heart level is key. What will you get from being free? What could you do that you can't do now? How will you believe about yourself or experience God differently? These motivators will drive our heart to action when we're tempted more than just simply believing that porn is wrong.
God designed you for motivation
God designed you to desire love, acceptance, significance, and more. Think about what your heart really wants or lacks when you engage with your sexual vice. Is it significance, value, or fun? It could be a number of other things. This will point you to the motivation your heart has to quit.
Eliminating our sexual vices makes room for God to come and satisfy us in the ways we are looking for. If you want significance, He'll use your story for good and your newfound openness will naturally impact others. If you want fun, your creative brain will start thinking of new ways to have fun when your sexual outlet isn't an option. God designed you for motivation. Now you have to identify what that is and how to let it drive you.
Are you motivated by guilt or godly sorrow?
Many of us are scared of getting caught or worry about what habitual masturbation will do to our sexual function down the road. These are things to be aware of, but they can be guilt-driven motivation. Godly sorrow is a real repentance with the awareness that behaviour affects God's heart and hinders His work in and through your life. Having godly sorrow and desiring a life free of sin to simply enjoy a more intimate relationship with Jesus will give you the motivation to face the hard decisions, like confessing to someone or paying money for help, that otherwise would be hard to face.
Share this with your friends
Who do you know that can benefit from this podcast and other episodes coming in the future? Share it with them so they can subscribe as well.
Subscribe
Subscribe on any podcast app to make sure you catch new episodes!
Resources
Relay app
Pure Freedom Community for men 18+
Pure Freedom Journey for men and women
Book a FREE call (men)
FamilyLife Canada: Resources and events to strengthen your marriage
Online marriage resources (FamilyLife Canada)
Covenant Eyes Accountability Software - use promo code RM30 for 30 days free
Podcast Hosts
BRADEN HAFNER
Braden is the Regional Director in Alberta for FamilyLife Canada. He has been married for 13 years to his wife Kristen, and they live in Edmonton, Alberta. He is passionate about seeing marriages grow and thrive, and helping couples move to a deeper oneness with one another and with God. FamilyLife Canada has a variety of resources and events to help you and your spouse take your marriage to the next level. See what would benefit you at www.familylifecanada.com
MATT CLINE
Matt and his wife Louise raise their little guys, David and Oliver, in Edmonton, Alberta. He is honoured to do what he can to tackle the epidemic of pornography and sexual perversion in every way possible. Seeing lives and marriages get free and experience the love of God in profound ways is what drives him every day. He leads Restored Ministries, is a certified speaker and coach for the John Maxwell Team, and formerly played hockey in the WHL and for Hockey Canada. You can visit www.restoredministries.ca.
