Welcome to episode #208! This week, Matt and Braden talk with Sam Black about his book “Healing the church” and equipping church leaders on how to talk about sexual brokenness in the church.
Pornography is undermining every ministry in the church.
The average age for first exposure is 8-12 and so our children’s ministries are being impacted by pornography whether we recognize it or not. If we don’t equip parents, we are missing the opportunity to protect them and provide them ongoing guidance. Pornogrpahy impacts our teens and youth ministry and marriage and adult ministries. Two thirds of men and one third of women in the church say they have an ongoing struggle with pornography. There is a direct correlation between pornography use and prayer, scripture life, church attendance, feelings about being close to God and doubts about your faith. A university study showed that there is a direct link between how much porn someone used and whether they would serve in their church over the next 6 years. It is important that the church is the safe place for people to go with their addictions to find recovery.
You don’t need a perfect plan - you need a first next step.
This will allow people to create that first step in their own lives. Every step leads to another step. The book breaks down the steps into “easy steps” - something you don’t have to think much about; there are “small steps” - steps you can implement without a lot of effort; then “medium” and “large” steps to lead into full recovery. Taking it one step at a time makes it easier and less overwhelming to accomplish and walk into recovery.
There are 3 common factors that ministry leaders miss for why people get stuck.
1 - Early childhood exposure. It’s so impactful on their brain that even as an adult they can tell you a complete story of that first exposure, but nothing else about that day.
2 - The ongoing use and repetition that burns neuro pathways in the brain to crave it more and more.
3 - Some pain or trauma that happened at a young age can happen elsewhere.
These three create pornography as an escape that has been done thousands of times. This is where a safe place and process comes in. The knowledge precedes understanding and understanding precedes change.
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Resources
The Healing Church - download the first chapter.
Pure Freedom Community for men 18+
Pure Freedom Journey for men and women
Book a FREE call (men)
FamilyLife Canada: Resources and events to strengthen your marriage
Online marriage resources (FamilyLife Canada)
Covenant Eyes Accountability Software - use promo code RM30 for 30 days free
Podcast Hosts
BRADEN HAFNER
Braden is the Regional Director in Alberta for FamilyLife Canada. He has been married for 14 years to his wife Kristen, and they live in Edmonton, Alberta. He is passionate about seeing marriages grow and thrive, and helping couples move to a deeper oneness with one another and with God. FamilyLife Canada has a variety of resources and events to help you and your spouse take your marriage to the next level. See what would benefit you at www.familylifecanada.com
MATT CLINE
Matt and his wife Louise raise their little guys, David and Oliver, in Edmonton, Alberta. He is honoured to do what he can to tackle the epidemic of pornography and sexual perversion in every way possible. Seeing lives and marriages get free and experience the love of God in profound ways is what drives him every day. He leads Restored Ministries, is a certified speaker and coach for the John Maxwell Team, and formerly played hockey in the WHL and for Hockey Canada. You can visit www.restoredministries.ca.
