Dr. Venus was in a complete breakdown. Her website crashed, her Amazon Prime account was hacked, and the sales page for her app had to abort. There was nothing else to do but to stop, take a moment, and pray. As she asked God to help her, the answer that showed up was so much more than she expected. Black Men showed up to get up under her dreams and use their expertise and wisdom to help not only with the tech app, but with the larger mission of birthing 100 Black Women Billionaires. To fully understand how much that means to Dr. Venus and why being able to trust Black Men is such a deeply spiritual leap of faith, we must first walk it back to the historical wounds that run seven generations deep.
Historically, Black people have been pitted against each other for survival. That was deliberate, and it worked. History refused to let us see each other through innocence, and we've thrown each other under the bus. It's a revolutionary act to allow yourself to be supported by a Black Man, but Dr. Venus is ready to put her trust and faith on the line and jump in.
Key Takeaways:
[3:31] We think the way we act is based upon character or personality traits, when really a lot of our actions come from strategies required to survive and stay alive. In the past, Dr. Venus has worked with Black Men who are initially on board, but then something triggers them and they don't say anything about it. Suddenly, they build up resentment, blow up, or leave. Sometimes it's all three.
[5:08] Feeling this historical wound doesn't mean Black Men or Women are broken or bad, it just equals woundedness. While on the streets, Dr. Venus had several Black Men that had her back and looked out for her. She doesn't have it that all Black Men are bad. She has it that Black Men are complicated.
[8:22] Dr. Venus discusses these wounds and gives historical context. Black Women feel angry for Black Men not protecting or hearing them, while Black Men feel disrespected and talked down to. On the plantation, Black Men were positioned to be "less than" and humiliated in front of their own families. Black Women were just bodies to be used, and they weren't listened to or protected. Because this is a spiritual wound that hasn't been addressed, it brings with it 400 years of rage. When you get the two wounds of not being heard and not being respected together, it is a bloody mess.
[11:36] While Dr. Venus was praying after her website crashed, what showed up were some really great Black Men. Dr. Venus believes God is pretty smart, and right now, there are a whole tribe of brilliant Black Men coming out to support her in ways she never even dreamed of, especially around her mission to birth 100 Black Women Billionaires and launch her app.
[14:19] Dr. Venus speaks of one Black Man who she is proud to have as a team member. He goes above and beyond, and she is being with how much she not only appreciates him, but needs his help as she expands in this new territory.
[18:43] Dr. Venus uses the analogy where she is in a canoe rowing along, and here comes someone pulling a yacht and offering her a ride all aboard this big ship. It feels scary to jump on, but she is emotionally ready and spiritually mature now to accept the help and put her trust in the Black Men showing up to help.
[20:41] Even if you haven't had the support of Black Men your whole life, it doesn't mean that it's too late to start. It's scary to set up your entire life to not need a man and then open your heart and mind to a different possibility, but at this point for Dr. Venus, it's not even an option, it's a need.
[22:02] How do you trust Black Man with your dreams? Nothing in life is guaranteed, but here is some basic groundwork:
Have these conversations until you are clear that he has heard you.
[25:53] It can feel weird to accept help and not feel as though you have to pay for it in some way.
[27:55] Step out on faith and know that God will catch you and not let anything bad happen.
[30:06] When you have big goals and aspirations, you can't reach the world alone. It takes a team, and that takes a certain amount of giving up control for a larger vision. It's a spiritual act for Black Women to trust Black Men, and someone has to start the ball rolling. Dr. Venus is willing to choose to trust them, communicate, and be transparent all the way through.
[31:17] This may just be in business now, but it can be applicable to more relationships beyond work. It opens the door for Black Men and Women to create something beautiful together, and communicate until there is an understanding in a way that comes from love.
[32:27] How do you trust Black Men with your dreams?
Quotes:
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