Jurassic World: Dominion, what a movie! Eye-popping special effects, likable characters, thought-provoking ideas about the relationship between man and nature, and complemented by impeccable scenes of tension that proudly take their place among the best feats cinema has to offer! Oh, wait, no I’m thinking of Jurassic Park. Jurassic World: Dominion is Jurassic Park’s second cousin, bitterly toiling away in the shadow of its more popular relative. Dominion is the 2022 conclusion to the Jurassic World trilogy, and even the most romantic of Romeos would struggle to call parting with these movies “such sweet sorrow”. In this case parting is more like speeding your jerk of a Tinder date home so you can get on with your life and drown the memory of the ill-fated tryst in a pint of ice cream. Jurassic World: Dominion is bloated, boring, unforgivably sloppy and about as tense as an elementary school play about the water cycle, and today the Magellans at the Movies will pass judgment on it (even though I think Nathan didn’t actually hate it but I write the descriptions so I get to say what I want) and hopefully leaven its burdensome runtime with the banter, recommendations, and general good vibes that has attracted tens of viewers to this podcast. Hold onto your butts!
