Never Nice, Always Kind is a bully food principle. If you’re a people pleaser, or you’re a little too nice, listen up!
Kindness and niceness can both be friendly, but they differ in depth. Kindness is friendly consideration, niceness is friendly pleasantness. Niceness can keep someone stuck in an illusion, and kindness sets them free. The other signal niceness sends is you think others can’t make up their own mind. That your way is the only option they have. People sense this and are repelled. They might even want to do just what you’d want least just to spite you. So what does this have to do with kindness vs niceness? Niceness is done for approval, so that you like me or at least leave me alone. Kindness is what I do because it’s right for me. It’s who I am. It’s the real me connecting with the real you. It’s no strings attached, but well intended. You give out what you truly want to share whether it’s a compliment for a friend or a criticism for a bully. The point is you’re not doing it to get something in return.
