"Oh, this is the worst-looking hat I ever saw. I bet when you buy a hat like this I bet you get a free bowl of soup. Oh, it looks good on you though.”
Judge Smails' reaction as he quickly removes the hat and walks out of the Bushwood pro-shop is Oscar worthy. How do I know there are certain people that will read this and immediately know what I’m talking about and others will be like “I don’t get it!”
It’s Caddyshack, and the answer is yes. Yes, as in you should watch it and not tell anyone it’s your first time. Or yes, you should call me and we can speak to each other in only movie quotes. It’s ok though if you don’t know what I’m talking about because whether you do or you don’t you are both falling in line with my plot.
When I was a kid I was a fashion 'killa.' I could rock a pair of un-matching Umbro shorts with a Nike Air t-shirt and a pair of Air Jordans and not skip a beat. Coolest kid in the hallways of my elementary school. Actually, I never owned a pair of Jordan’s until I was 16 so I guess I’m not that cool. I did once wear the same pair of sweatpants to school for an entire week not because I didn’t have anything else to wear, but because I wanted to. The great thing about it though. There wasn’t some guy staring at me and making fun of my life choices. Maybe complaining about the smell, but not the style. And style, style is ultimately what I’m here to discuss. In the late 80’s to me (remember this is a column and my opinion and not all of it is fact) style was centered around brands. Nike, Adidas, Umbro, Guess, and if you were super cool Girbaud jeans (you remember that little white patch across the zipper?). Doesn’t it feel like now it’s centered around look, around feel? Do you even remember what life was like pre-stretch jeans? And yes guys, I’m talking to you. I mean honestly, if you haven’t bought jeans made of that magic stretchiness I sort of feel bad for you. Then again, maybe you have no idea what you’re missing.
When it comes to fashion there seems to be this sense of “FOMO.” You know, at first you feel like a trendsetter, then it slowly feels bland until eventually you cave. “I need a new style.” So, where do you go? You go to Pinterest to look at styles, you go to Amazon to check the prices and probably just click “order now.” There are options everywhere until there’s the option you didn’t know existed. That’s just frustrating isn’t it? The way we are now with our buying habits. The way we want to do all the work ourselves, all of the research. We want to look at everything, we want all of the options. For example, when I’m searching for Air Jordan’s I want to see every single pair before I make a commitment. Especially when I get the official approval for the CFO (aka, my wonderful wife) I want to make the best decision because you never know when it’s going to happen again and God forbid you make the wrong decision and end up like Judge Smails standing in that pro-shop wearing the wrong hat.
At this point you’re probably wondering (if you’re still with me) how I’m going to tie a roofing company into this one. If you are, I can’t believe you’re doubting me. How about this. Roofle has over 800 products. WHOA!!! Yeah, over 800. You can be the trendy fashionista that stands out, or play it safe with a roof that fits right in. It’s totally up to you and no one else. Just think of your 10 year old self digging through your closet (or your dirty hamper, ewww). You go ahead and pick out whatever roof you want. Just know, when you speak with our customer experience team we won’t have any right to tell you what roof you think looks great. I mean we can tell you everything you would ever want to know about the product but that’s about it. Because at Roofle, you’re in control and we wouldn’t want to gamble with losing you as a customer.
This isn’t Bushwood, but if it was we know Judge Smails would remind us, “there’s no gambling at Bushwood.”
