Ultimately, it comes down to one question. Are you in? For you, and for them.
You’re Single Because They Got The Ick
The Ick, the ultimate red flag, makes perfect sense and is all about likelihood ratios.
Koenfucius: The ‘ick’ is a colloquial term for a feeling of disgust triggered by a specific—typically trivial—behaviour from a romantic partner, often leading to the relationship's demise. New research explores why some are more prone to getting it than others.
Robin Hanson: “Women also experienced the ick more frequently, with 75% having had the ick compared to 57% of men … Those with a higher tendency for disgust … [&] grandiose narcissism was linked to stronger ick reactions, as was holding partners to exceptionally high standards.”
Paul Graham: About 30% of Seinfeld episodes were about this.
One gets The Ick because a small act is evidence of one's general nature. The right type of person would never do [X], ideally never want to do [X], and at minimum would have learned not to do [X]. Often this is because they would know this is indicative of attribute [Y]. Indeed, if they should be aware that [X] [...]
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Outline:
(00:18) You're Single Because They Got The Ick
(02:53) You Are Still Single Because You Are Inventing Red Flags
(05:10) You're Still Single Because You Demand The Same Generic Things
(06:51) You're Single Because Everyone Is Too Picky
(08:46) You're Single And They Will Never Tell You Why
(10:19) You're Single Because You Won't Tell Them The Problem
(12:12) You're Not Single But The Clock Is Ticking
(13:21) You're Single Because of Your Bodycount
(15:11) You're Single Because You Failed To Read The Signs
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First published:
December 30th, 2025
Source:
https://www.lesswrong.com/posts/6hhPbovwRWem4fvwr/dating-roundup-9-signals-and-selection
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Narrated by TYPE III AUDIO.
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