"Send Ben a text"
Powerful Communication Principles
- Seek to first understand, then to be understood.
- Listen
- Validate
- Seek to understand their model
- What are their circumstances?
- How do they think?
- How are they feeling?
- What are their actions?
- What are the results they're creating and what results do they want to create?
- Understand your own model.
- Show that you either understand, or that you want to understand.
- Catch and reprogram your automated responses
- Your automated responses are likely to be unintentional,
- Catch it and replace it with an intentional response.
- It helps me to explore different perspective.
- It helps me to explore different driving emotions.
- Tell the whole truth.
- One of the things that kills communication is dishonesty
- Be honest with yourself and others.
- Tell the WHOLE truth, not just the convenient of soft truth.
- Be committed to YOUR relationship with them.
- It's powerful to know that NOTHING you can ever do will change how someone feels towards you.
- Commit to your relationship with your teen, no matter what!
- Your teen just wants to be heard, understood, and to belong.
- Commit to that.
- Speak from a space of service.
- This is a tricky one.
- It's not, "How can I fix you?"
- It's "How can I help you?"
- Seek to first understand, then to be understood.
- Part of communication is being understood.
- We don't want to ignore this.
- How can you make things relevant to your teen.
- How can you make things easier to understand?
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