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Saying no, is something you need to add as a healthy boundary.  You can’t do it all.  You can  say no for your loved one.  You can say no for yourself.  You can say no to sustain your energy.    

Here are my some key No statements I live by.    As you listen, consider which one fit you or which ones spark ideas for you. 

• Say NO to stress overload  What is causing excess stress?  What can you do to reduce it?  Realize that stress overload will lead to burnout and further health issues for you.  
• Say NO to dangers and threats .  You may have to take a hard stand for your loved one when it comes to their safety.
• Say NO to guilt.  You have to take care of yourself and put yourself first.  You are doing the right thing by making prioritizing your health physically and mentally.   Release your guilt.  
  • It’s important to stop the negative thoughts of guilt and shame
  • You are allowed to rest and relax 
  • You are allowed to enjoy your passions and goals
• Say NO Negativity and toxicity   This one is hard if this is your loved one.  It may require you to practice responses and situations and even having hard conversation.  When you let in negativity and toxic people, it will bring you down.  I personally will not allow it.  It sounds harsh but I have learned I can’t 
• Say NO for your loved one.   
  • You may have to say no to visitors or people that may bring in a cold or covid.   Be appreciative that they want to visit, but it may have to wait.   
  • You may have to have hard conversations with doctors, family, members etc
• Say NO to your reality and being ok staying still    
  • You have a choice to stand still and not change.  
  • You have a choice to wait until it’s all done
  • You have a choice to step into your new reality and make changes for the better
  • Don’t talk yourself out of change
  • When you shift your thoughts and actions, it will feel uncomfortable
  • Do you want to feel stuck and stressed or do you want a life of joy and gratitude? 

I want to end with this analogy….  As a toddler, we wanted to explore everything, touching things, putting things in our mouth, and testing everything.  What words did we hear all the time….. No.  No. No.    Little toddlers then start mimicking these words and start saying them too.  But a toddler never stops exploring.  They keep going and finding new things to explore.  If mom tell him/her no, don’t touch that, they move on to another thing.  

As a caregiver, keep going.  Stand strong on your no and figure out what yours are.   They are your healthy boundaries and expectations.   

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