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There are two ways you become a caregiver:  

1.  Caregiving often creeps up on you.  

It may start with dropping by your mom’s house and doing her laundry or taking your dad to a doctor’s appointment.  You find yourself doing the grocery shopping or refilling prescriptions.  Gradually, you are doing more and more.  At some point, you realize you have a commitment to take care of someone else

2.  The Sudden Event

Sometimes caregiving is triggered by a major health event, such as a stroke, heart attack, or accident.  Maybe you suddenly realize that dad’s memory lapses have become dangerous.  

Life as you know it stops, and all your energy goes to caring for your loved one.  Caregiving has become your new career, and you adjust to a new normal.  

Whatever your relationship with the person, you’re caring for, it’s important that you add the title CAREGIVER to the list of things you are.  Without identifying yourself as a caregiver, you won’t know to search for resources that can help you navigate this new role.  

You play other roles too.   You may be employed full-time or part-time.  Maybe you're an entrepreneur.  You may be raising children, or be a volunteer, a spouse, have other family commitments.  Adding caregiving to your list can easily lead to frustration, exhaustion.  Think about those everyday things that you now do:

• Calling the doctor, insurance companies and advocating care
• Day to day needs  while trying to do the same things you were doing before your caregiver title.  

I would recommend you make a list of all that you do as a caregiver. My intent is for you to see it all!!   If you don’t see it, you just keep going and that can lead to Caregiver Stress which is a true diagnosis which can lead to Caregiver Burnout.  

Here are my 10  steps to do when you are a New Caregivers (or this can be Taking a Step Back as an Existing Caregiver)  Reason i think you should do this is…….It’s easy to become overwhelmed as a new caregiver.

1. Identify yourself as the caregiver (I am my Mom’s primary caregiver.  I Denis wife and caregiver. )
2. Get a good diagnosis and understand your LOs condition.  
3. Learn what specific skills you might need to care them with that dx.  (dementia requires specific communications and safety care, chronic heart disease requires meds, monitoring)
4. Find your team of care advocates 
5. Talk about finances and healthcare wishes
6. Complete the paperwork (Ie power of attorney, advanced directives
7. Bring family and friends together to discuss care
8. Keep them up to date on the current situation and find the right way to communicate
9. Find support for yourself and your LO
10. Remember you are not alone and you can’t do it all.  

It’s important to try to get ahead of the overwhelm or recognize when you need help.  There are three levels of True Caregiver Overwhelm.   Disclaimer - I am not a medical professional but have done tons of research to understand this.  I’ve been there and actually dx with Caregiver Stress and can relate to it.    In the show notes:  I a  free document that explains more of Caregiver stress at cathylvan.com/caregiverstress

1. Caregiver Stress  
2. Caregiver burnout
3. Compassion Fatigue

So if I circle back, it’s really important to bring in family and friends to help and find support for your LO and most importantly you.   Find yourself a therapist or caregiver coach.  This will really help you see the reality, different perspectives and problem solve.    

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