What can you do if your daughter looks like she’s hesitating during competitions? As much as you believe in the skills your athlete shows during practice, she is the one living her thoughts during the game.
She has to have the tools to shift her thoughts herself.
In this episode, we’re gonna tackle the differences between practice and competition. Her possible thoughts during the game and the reasons behind it. We’re gonna also talk about ways you can help and support your daughter in times of pressure.
So let’s start!
She Practices Well but Doesn’t Compete
You may have noticed how well she practices but hesitates during the game. Why is this happening?
On the surface level, it happens because practice feels very different from the competition. There are more nerves, pressure, winning, and other things at stake here. It just feels different.
And if you peel that surface level, we’ll see that some athletes who are struggling during the game suffer some beliefs about themselves. They believe that they have to be perfect. They think they aren’t allowed to make mistakes, and if they do, they’re going to let people down.
Nervousness and extreme anxiety could be the result of perfectionism or people-pleasing belief.
How can you help?
In ECP, we have a community for sports moms where we give them support and teach them about failure and how to manage it.
We don’t let moms jump out there and fix wrong thoughts and negative feelings for their daughters. We teach moms how to validate their daughter's feelings which leads to letting their daughter have the skills to handle mistakes or even nervousness.
There are also techniques and strategies that we put on our modules such as:
You can shape her environment and provide these opportunities to learn. You can be her best support at the moment and be that sturdy presence. Or you can preload mental skills out of the moment by providing her the opportunities for lessons.
The intense hesitation, pressure, and nerves your daughter feels during the competition will always happen, because there is more at stake during competitions than in practice. And just as we mentioned above there are underlying reasons such as perfectionism and people-pleasing beliefs. As much as you want to help her get out of a negative spot, she has to do her part as well. She is the one that is out there living with her thoughts.
She is the one out there feeling that nervousness and anxiousness in her body. And you can't do the breathing work for her. You can't do the visualization for her. You can't shift that thought that she's thinking in her head for her. That’s where programs like The Elite Competitor Program can come in and help.
At the time of this recording, The Elite Competitor Program is on a waitlist. You can check it out and click the link here at ECP - www.kristinabreane.com/ecp. Put your name on the waitlist so that you're in the loop when we're opening our program next. It will be soon.
This is how your daughter can learn those skills, and how you can also learn to support her as the best sports mom.
Nothing will replace HER learning these things herself. You do your part, she does her part.
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