This will be the final episode on the gift of perseverance. I would like to talk about the last part of step 10 which is, “… and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.” The inability to admit when we are wrong is a lot to do with our so-called, ego. I often allude to the ego is skipping along in my mind, with its two pals, procrastination, and rationalization. This scenario is not just the ego, but it’s the ego being allowed to influence us in an inappropriate way. The ego is not a “real” thing. It is a psychological construct that is used to explain some of our behaviors. This “ego” is neither good nor bad. How could it be? It does not even exist as a real thing.
However, our thinking and our behavior is used to protecting ourselves. At this point in our program, although our Spirit is trying to influence us, we are still human, as we shall always be until our death. It is difficult to let go of our old attempts to protect ourselves. I tended to rationalize as I’m taking my inventory and say to myself, “well, that thing I did wasn’t really that bad.” I might also procrastinate and say to myself, “I’ll take care of that the next time it happens.” Neither of these is a good idea, especially now that I am trying to listen to my Spirit. My Spirit encourages me to take the bull by the horns and deal with these things in a rational and timely manner.
We are told in the literature that at this point in our step program the actual reason we are here, i.e., alcohol, overeating, drug addiction, etc., has probably faded out of the picture. Our goal now, is to slowly but surely live a life that reflects our new-found spiritual basis for life.
