The episode begins with the usual chaos as Abish makes her grand, unannounced absence known. Enter Joel, the guest who’s here to fill the void left by Abish with his own brand of hilarious irreverence. The gang dives straight into a fierce debate over Star Trek—a classic topic where no one’s opinion is safe. But of course, everyone agrees on one thing: Lower Decks is the hidden gem of the franchise. But, what about the drink? It's Moroni's invention the "Sacrilegious Sour." Tangy, spooky, and just a little too good for any mortal to drink. Perfect for those who want their drink as complex as their trauma. A bit of civic responsibility is also tossed in when Moroni offers up his voting experience, reminding everyone that, yes, your vote does matter, especially when you can slap a sticker on your chest afterward. The banter continues until it’s time for a sponsor break, because of course, even sarcasm needs to pay the bills.
Scriptures: [00:13:07]
aaaAAAaaa leads us into the heavy waters of D&C sections 53-55, offering his trademark blend of irreverence and insight. First, Sydney Gilbert is told to preach, and of course, he’s warned to stay obedient to the commandments. You know, just the typical divine corporate instructions. Then, Newel Knight’s congregation is booted from Lehman Copley’s farm, and they’re told to make their way to Missouri—because nothing says “prosperity” like enduring hardship for God. Lastly, William W. Phelps is called to be baptized, ordained, and tasked with shaping the minds of the youth. Along the way, we sprinkle in some humor, including jokes about the Lord “coming quickly” and comparisons to modern bureaucracy.
Special Guest Joel: [00:22:53]
Joel, our once Methodist guest, offers us a rollercoaster ride through his journey from mild curiosity to full-fledged religious disillusionment. Picture this: a kid who, at the tender age of "too young to know better," questioned his mom about worshipping Roman gods—because who wouldn’t want to pray to Jupiter? As his family got deeper into the church, Joel wrestled with faith, identity, and his growing sense of not fitting in. This spirals into a scandalous affair involving the fire-and-brimstone preacher and his mother, causing the proverbial house of cards to fall apart. From family chaos to religious trauma, Joel shares how he navigated these spiritual minefields, eventually ditching organized religion for college, freedom, and personal growth. Despite the wreckage, his story highlights the importance of telling our truths and finding strength in shared experiences of religious trauma. His journey was painful, yes, but it’s also a testament to the power of reclaiming your identity.
History: [01:28:01]
Abigail takes us on a historical detour, filled with her signature humor, into the life of Madame Helena Blavatsky—19th-century occultist, mystic, and all-around eccentric. Starting with an exploration of Philip Stewart Robinson’s book Sinners and Saints, Abigail reveals how Mormons were once believed to have an “intrinsic understanding of the occult.” Robinson’s theory gets a hearty side-eye as we dive into the colorful life of Blavatsky, who, among her many adventures, allegedly made a pit stop in Salt Lake City in men’s hiking boots. We explore her eccentricities, her claims of mystic encounters, and her founding of the Theosophical Societ
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