The episode begins with Moroni, Abish, Abigail, and aaaAAAaaa exchanging their signature witty repartee. They reminisce about a birthday party that veered from Pinterest-perfect to Mad Max: Sprinkles Road and introduce this week's cocktail, "Keeping the Sabbath Day Ho-ho-holy." It's a holiday drink so sugary it might prompt repentance—or a dental visit. Highlights include a roast of Home Alone's logistics, Pedro Pascal fangirling, and an enthusiastic tangent about the absurdity of Teeth: The Musical. The crew sets the scene for what promises to be a rollercoaster of irreverence and intellect.
Scriptures: [00:18:16]
Hijinks & Detours: What starts as a dive into Doctrine & Covenants 59-60 derails into the confusion between Italian filmmaker Luca Guadagnino and Luigi Mangione, CEO slayer. Naturally, chaos reigns.
Sabbath Commandments: The hosts tackle themes of gratitude, righteousness, and loving your neighbor with skepticism and snark. A side debate erupts: "Is excessive laughter really that bad?" Consensus? Absolutely not—especially if it involves people getting hit by buses in movies.
Missouri or Bust: Doctrine & Covenants 60’s divine call-out of stage fright sparks debate about introvert shame. Edward Partridge gets roasted as the unwitting divine Venmo account. A vivid sidebar imagines all of this as bedtime reading for Fred Savage—Deadpool style.
Church Teachings: [00:37:48]
Abish leads a rollicking critique of LDS Sabbath teachings, unpacking rules like “no recreational activities” and “confess sins on Sunday,” which feel more like medieval quest prompts than modern guidelines.
Anecdotes: The hosts share cringe-worthy personal stories, like hosting missionaries during the Super Bowl and mistakenly eating ant-filled biscuits. Lessons? Sabbath rules are impractical and ants do not belong in biscuits.
Cultural Enforcement: Small-town LDS Sabbath rigidity gets compared to HOA enforcement—only with more guilt and fewer lawn gnomes.
History: [00:59:36]
Abigail introduces Jacob Hamblin, the Mormon missionary with a flair for miracles and a Wikipedia entry that screams "citation needed." His life, from regrettable early marriage to miracle claims, gets dissected with a mix of humor and historical critique.
Blended Family & Blunders: Hamblin's family drama includes polygamy, a traumatized child survivor of Mountain Meadows, and a teenage Paiute wife who bailed. His home life? Essentially a pioneer reality show.
Peacemaker Legacy: Despite questionable choices, Hamblin’s diplomacy with Native tribes stands out as ahead of its time. He’s dubbed “the least heinous guy in a heinous era.”
The episode ends with the crew marveling at the absurdity of Mormon history, noting that even a figure like Jacob Hamblin seems oddly progressive—if you squint hard enough.
This episode serves up hilarity, irreverence, and just enough historical critique to keep you coming back for more.
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