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In this episode, Wil Fisher sits down with Annie Schuessler-Zam, a trauma healer who uses Brainspotting and Parts Work to help people release stuck emotional pain. Annie was a licensed psychotherapist for 20 years and now works outside of the medical model. She also runs workshops for folks who are estranged from a parent and want to create their most beautiful and meaningful lives, and she’s the host of Rebel Therapist, a podcast devoted to healers doing their own personal work.
Together, they explore:
- Parts Work / IFS as an invitation to create enough inner safety for our younger “exiled” parts to come forward with their messages.
- Attachment wounds, tenderness, and what it’s like when insecurity shows up in close relationships—and why that can actually be a sign of healing.
- The difference between soothing a part versus accidentally silencing it with quick “you’re fine” band-aids.
- Disclosure + discernment: how to know what to share, why you’re sharing it, and how to stay resourced when feedback isn’t gentle.
- The myth that healers should have it all together—and why it’s actually a red flag when a healer isn’t doing their own work.
- “Healing waves”: why the work doesn’t really end, but our capacity to ride it can deepen over time.
- Estrangement in queer communities: finding your place on the estrangement continuum with integrity and self-trust.
- A practical framework for boundaries: choosing the level of contact that allows you to have your best relationship with yourself and the people you love.
- Chosen family, grief, and the complex emotions that can arise when an estranged parent dies.
- Compassion and boundaries: how forgiveness and love don’t require continued access or self-sacrifice.
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