If you've ever felt like you were losing your mind in your relationship - questioning your own memory, shrinking your social circle, or blaming yourself for your partner's moods - there's a name for that. It’s called coercive control.
In this podcast episode, Jolee Vacchi, family law attorney and founder of Foundations Family Law and Mediation Center in Worcester, Massachusetts, explains how coercive control (including manipulation, gaslighting, and emotional intimidation) slowly chips away at a person’s confidence, relationships, and sense of autonomy without ever leaving visible bruises. She breaks down the subtle behaviors that often get dismissed as “normal relationship problems” and explains why so many people stay stuck far longer than they ever imagined.
Jolee also tackles one of the most counterintuitive questions in high-conflict divorce: is going to court actually the right move when your spouse thrives on control? (Her answer might surprise you.)
Jolee also discloses specific strategies that can shift the power dynamic when you're up against someone who knows exactly how to weaponize the legal system.
From parenting coordinators to protective orders to keeping yourself sane while living under the same roof during divorce proceedings, this conversation is packed with practical, eye-opening guidance. Whether you're in the thick of your divorce or just starting to ask hard questions, this episode will help you understand what you're dealing with, and what your options actually are.
About Jolee
Jolee Vacchi is known as "The Compassionate Divorce Attorney." She is the Founding Attorney of Foundations Family Law & Mediation Center located in Worcester, Massachusetts. As a mediator, Collaboratively-trained attorney, and Coercive Control Trauma-Informed Attorney, Jolee focuses her practice on out-of-court solutions for her clients to resolve their family law conflicts as painlessly and peacefully as possible.
Connect with Jolee
You can connect with Jolee on LinkedIn at Jolee E. Vacchi, Esq and on Facebook at Foundations Family Law. You can follow Jolee on YouTube at @FoundationsFamilyLaw, on Instagram at Foundations Family Law and on her podcast at Divorce Detox. To learn more about working with Jolee, visit her website at Foundations Family Law.
Karen Covy is a Divorce Coach and Consultant, Lawyer, Author, and Speaker who is dedicated to helping people make the best decisions possible for themselves, their families, and their future - especially in stressful times. You can check out Karen's videos on YouTube.
You can connect with Karen on LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and on her own website at karencovy.com.
