In the previous episode, Heidi shared why handling loss has been on her mind and ways to handle loss.
Today she discusses losses that are common for women that experience PMDD and ways that can help you feel better.
Take Aways
Losses women experience when PMDD symptoms are active:
- Relationship with yourself: You experience the loss of your “usual” relationship with yourself (during days 15-28).
- Relationship with your husband: Normal solutions for conflict resolution don’t work. You lose the ability and judgement to resolve conflict in the ways that work when your symptoms are not active.
- Appreciate the days when you feel like yourself. (For me days 1-14.)
- The foundation of your relationship with your significant other is going to be lost in some ways.
- It's okay to be sad about the losses you experience.
- You may literally lose a boyfriend or husband through a break up due to actions you take when your symptoms are active.
- Dealing with the loss of no longer have that person in your life.
- It's okay to mourn the loss of that relationship, whether it is temporary or permanent.
- Relationship with your children: Losing the ability to communicate as well. Loss of connection because you are so focused inward or are overbearing.
- Time. Recognizing you are giving/losing time to help your PMDD that you would rather spend on other things.
- You spend time researching, going to appointments, sleeping, journaling, taking time off of work to increase your overall quality of life.
- Health. A loss of what is your “normal” health. Loss of control pertaining to your body shape, physical abilities, weight fluctuations, stress, and uncertainty during days 16-28 of your cycle.
- Remind yourself: I will get my “normal” health back. What I do still affects the outcome of my overall body, mind, and spirit.
- Money. Some PMDD remedies and ways that help PMDD are not covered by insurance so you have to pay out of pocket.
- Recognizing that you are giving up money as a trade for *hopefully a better life.
- It's okay to mourn the loss of money that you could be spending for vacations, new shoes, to do outings with your kids, etc.
-How to feel better:
- Identify to yourself the loss that you are experiencing right now.
- Is it a physical/tangible loss or an emotional loss?
- Take action based on it being a tangible loss or an emotional loss.
- Show physical affection to others. i.e. pet your dog, lay on your husband’s shoulder, hug your child.
- Request your husband hold you.
- Physical touch will sometimes fill the void of loss you are experiencing.
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