Resilience was something I wore like armour for years. Two cancer diagnoses, the end of a marriage, and a lot of pushing through. By the third diagnosis, I started questioning whether resilience was actually serving me, or just keeping me from feeling what I needed to feel.
In this episode I talk about the moment I realised I didn't want to fight anymore. Not giving up, but genuinely stepping back from the warrior narrative that surrounds cancer and asking if there was another way to move through it. Michael Singer's The Surrender Experiment comes into it, as does a book I received from someone who cared about me that I simply couldn't bring myself to read.
I also explore a concept from yoga, the idea of being the witness to your own experience rather than being consumed by it. What it actually looks like to stop performing strength and start being honest about what's happening. If you've ever exhausted yourself being strong, this one's for you.
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