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In this vulnerable session, Chelsea sits down with French Canadian wellness coach and author Sandrine Lavoie-Filion to discuss the profound identity shift that often accompanies motherhood. Despite years of experience as a kinesiologist coaching pregnant and postpartum women, Sandrine reveals the stark difference between theoretical knowledge and the internal reality of becoming a mother.
Sandrine opens up about her unexpected journey into motherhood, the shame she felt when her initial reaction to a positive pregnancy test was fear rather than joy, and the challenges of bonding with a baby who didn't initially "feel" like hers. She describes how she used journaling to navigate postpartum meltdowns and the loss of her former self, eventually turning those private reflections into her book, Uncensored First Time Mom Confessions. This episode is a must-listen for anyone who has ever felt like "the problem" while navigating the complexities of their new parental identity.
🔑Key Takeaways
- Theory vs. Experience: Even experts can feel overwhelmed; Sandrine discovered that knowing the physiology of postpartum is entirely different from living through the hormonal and identity shifts.
- The Complexity of the "Positive" Test: It is valid and common to feel scared, overwhelmed, or even shameful when learning of a pregnancy, especially if it wasn't planned or if you previously questioned your desire to have children.
- Delayed Bonding is Normal: Unconditional love isn't always instantaneous; for many, it is a relationship that grows over time through the routine of care and mutual discovery.
- The "Golden Hour" Myth: Labor is physically and mentally exhausting; Sandrine highlights that wanting to sleep rather than have a "magical" bonding moment immediately after birth is a valid reaction to sleep deprivation.
- Journaling as a Healing Tool: Putting thoughts on paper allows parents to externalize their "spiraling" thoughts, navigate the root causes of meltdowns, and release the shame associated with their feelings.
💬Sound Bites
- "I realized now that there's a big difference between what you can know about pregnancy and postpartum versus how it actually feels."
- "Who would have thought that becoming a mother brought so many questions about yourself, but also the type of mother you want to be?"
- "I had that pregnancy test saying I was pregnant. And I was just scared, overwhelmed, and I didn't know how to feel."
- "I think it's unrealistic to say like, this is a new human being and I'm supposed to have this unconditional love for him. I don't know him."
- "When you write it down, when it's on paper, it's so much easier because you can go back to it... understand it better... and ask yourself questions."
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Special Thanks to Steve Audy for the use of our theme song: Quiet Connection
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