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What if growth doesn’t start with fixing, but instead with understanding ourselves?
In this episode I reflect on how as a society it seems we're so focused on needing to fix ourselves. Or even thinking we are broken in some way aka in need of fixing. We look at the role fixed and growth mindset can play in this (and my own experience of falling off a bike at a young impressionable age) as well as negativity bias and other concepts brought to light via Positive Psychology. Ultimately I offer an invitation to rebrand the need or desire to fix yourself, and instead work to better understand yourself. This is far more valuable!
Episode topics:
- Growth vs Fixed mindset and how it can influence your belief system
- How our brains are wired for negativity (negativity bias) and how this shows up everywhere we look, especially in feedback
- Positive Psychology and the infamous talk that Marty Seligman gave back in the late 90s about psychology being half baked (described by Marcus Buckingham - see below link)
- The role of self compassion and self acceptance; once we have self compassion we can begin to ask different questions and see ourselves differently
- A framework: the role our beliefs play in our behaviors: our beliefs generate our thoughts + emotions which drive our behaviors which in turn create our actions or outcomes
- Starting to see your belief system as your own inner code - the keys to unlocking you. This is where the Enneagram can help quite a bit.
- Try a Five Minute Reflection at the end of your day for 1-2 weeks. Consider how you showed up in different situations, times of day, various people
Coaching Prompts:
- Where in your life do you feel like you’re always trying to 'fix' yourself?
- What if that behavior is protecting something deeper? Any ideas on what that could be?
- Can you meet that part of you with curiosity this week instead of criticism?
Resources | Links:
Book | Mindset by Carol Dweck
Book | Self Compassion by Kristen Neff
Article | Positive Psychology
Book | Negativity Bias via Feedback Reimagined
Video | Marcus Buckingham / Positive Psychology
The Enneagram
Instagram | The Work of You
Instagram | Grow Collective
Website | The Work of You
Website | Grow Collective
