Why does it feel like the abuse didn’t end with divorce?
Because post-separation abuse started.
We discuss what it actually looks like after divorce or separation—and how family court, co-parenting, money, parenting plans, and even the kids themselves can become tools for continued control. We break down our own experiences with high-conflict co-parenting and how a poorly structured parenting plan—especially a 50/50 schedule—can create endless opportunities for conflict long after the relationship is over.
And because this is High Conflict Hell, we somehow make our way from legal abuse and financial control to expensive yogurt, penis pumps, new girlfriends, birthday-party drama, and Family of Destruction Court. Welcome to hell. 😂
In this episode:
- What is post-separation abuse? The patterns of intimidation, control, harassment, discrediting, financial abuse, legal abuse, and isolation that can continue—or escalate—after a relationship ends.
- Legal abuse & family court: When court motions, contempt threats, attorneys, evaluations, custody disputes, and the legal process itself become another source of control.
- Financial abuse after divorce: Court costs, attorney fees, school tuition, extracurriculars, reimbursements, stopped checks, and the exhausting fight over who owes what.
- When the kids get caught in the middle: How ongoing conflict between parents can directly affect children—even when everyone insists the adult issues are “separate” from parenting.
- 50/50 parenting plans & high-conflict co-parenting: Why frequent exchanges and vague parenting-plan language can create more opportunities for conflict and continued contact.
- Building a better parenting plan: Fewer exchanges, neutral exchange locations, clearer terms, and other ways to reduce opportunities for post-separation conflict.
- Discrediting & the “crazy ex” narrative: What happens when mental health accusations, alienation claims, and attacks on a parent’s credibility become part of the litigation.
- The red flags that were there before divorce: From controlling spending to questioning what you buy at the grocery store—sometimes the expensive yogurt really was trying to tell you something.
- Why leaving doesn’t always end the abuse: Divorce can end the marriage without ending the power struggle, particularly when children keep two people legally connected for years.
- Plus: New love, forgotten brunch plans, birthday-party betrayal, mosquito-bite titties, penis pumps, and why family court might need to be renamed Family of Destruction Court.
Post-separation abuse. High-conflict divorce. Co-parenting. 50/50 custody. Financial abuse. Legal abuse. Family court. Parenting plans. We’re getting into all of it—because sometimes getting divorced is only the beginning.
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