Welcome back to Judging Things, where dry lips meet ruthless opinions and absolutely no product is safe. In this episode, the girls dive headfirst into the cutthroat world of lip balm reviews—and yes, things get weird. From the “OG basic” ChapStick to crunchy-girl Burt’s Bees, spicy Carmex, chaotic Starburst-flavored nonsense, and one rogue under-the-boob vet clinic chapstick, no lip moisturizer escapes judgment.
Along the way, the trio uncovers shocking truths (your lips are basically your inside mouth on the outside), debates whether lip balm addiction is real, and discovers that most lip products are basically just petroleum jelly in disguise with a personality problem.
And then—like a smooth, glossy hero—one product absolutely demolishes the competition.
If you’ve ever wondered which lip balm actually works, which ones are secretly sabotaging your lips, and which ones belong straight in the trash… this episode delivers sass, science, and savage takes in equal measure.
P.S. We swear. A lot. Listener discretion advised.
Key Takeaways:
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Hosts/Producers/Editors: Jeanne Hafner, Jessica Griffith, & Joanna Hafner
Original Music by Lundstroem
