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This episode is Part 2 of How To Manage Your Emotions In Marriage. It's all about how to live the "empowered life" in relationship with yourself, your spouse, your children, and your friends! As you know, we all have our moments in marriage when it seems almost impossible to get unstuck in negative emotions such as guilt, shame, anxiety, resentment, and fear (to name a few). This episode will give you real hope in learning how to break free from allowing events, people or situations to dictate the quality of our lives.
Here’s a recap of what we talk about in this episode.
- Thoughts Feelings Actions
- This is the paradigm:What I THINK determines how I FEEL, and how I feel determines my ACTIONS.
- This is a great truth that we have used with thousands of people over the years. It's one that now you get to use going forward in your marriage and other relationships!
- Thoughts, Self-Talk, and Narrative all mean the same. They all determine the feeling that will follow.
- The five main categories to the Managing Emotions Process:
- A = Event
- B = Thoughts
- C = Feelings & Actions
- D = Dispute
- E = New B or Thought
- When looking at A, B, or C, the fact is we almost never have power over A (the event).
- However, we do have complete power over "B" (what we tell ourselves about "A") and therefore power over "C' (feelings and actions).
- Disputing (D) is a huge step to managing your emotions!
- Learning how to dispute the old thought or self-statement (B) with these two questions:
- Is this thought or self-statement true or rational?
- Who would I be without this thought?
- Perhaps a person with more joy.
- Perhaps a person with more confidence.
- Perhaps a person with more assertiveness.
- Perhaps a person with more patience.
- The last step, E is where the true change takes place!
- If you decide (after disputing) that your thought is irrational, YOU MUST REPLACE IT with a new thought (B)!
- Your feelings and actions will follow!
Call To ACTION
Any real change requires a call to actions. So here are a few things we want you to do.
- Revisit this episode if you were unable to take notes.
- Start a journal using A-B-C-D-E.
- This will be a great way to see on paper how you are starting to take charge of your emotions!
- Be sure to SUBSCRIBE to the Red Truck Marriage podcast and and write a REVIEW!
- We don't want you to miss an episode!
- Invite another couple you care about to the Red Truck Marriage podcast!
- Choose to drive the Red Truck in your marriage!
- It will cause your spouse to RUN towards you.
- Listen to the trailer if you don't know the story about the Red Truck!
- Join the Red Truck Marriage Facebook Group!
- You will get exclusive "goodies" from us by being a member!
- We will join you weekly for coaching on becoming the HEROES of your Marriage Story!
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