In this episode, David and Ruth continue their conversation on masculinities and their relationship to power, gender, and abuse. They unpack the limits of the term “toxic masculinity,” explore how men’s positive—and harmful—impacts on family functioning are often underestimated, and reflect on where our current conversations about gender may be falling short.
As they examine how culture has framed masculinity and femininity as opposing or dichotomous forces, David and Ruth discuss how qualities often labeled as “classically male”—such as power, courage, and progress—can be understood and expressed without defaulting to domination, violence, or control. They consider how men’s behaviors and choices matter deeply to their partners, their children, and the wider culture, and what it means to truly operationalize men as a vital part of the fabric of a healthy society.
The conversation also turns to the importance of supporting men in developing their internal emotional world, not as a soft add-on, but as a foundation for stability, accountability, and safety within themselves and their families. Ruth shares her long-standing concern with the widespread and mistaken belief that masculinity and violence are inherently linked, and how this narrative normalizes control and violence by framing them as inevitable outcomes of sex, gender, or biology.
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