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Dismissive Avoidants don’t chase — but that doesn’t mean they don’t care. Often, their withdrawal comes not from indifference but from deep-seated fear and subconscious self-protection. Understanding why they pull away is the first step to seeing the truth behind their behaviour.
In this video, Thais Gibson explains what it really means when a Dismissive Avoidant doesn’t chase, why vulnerability feels unsafe for them, and how their subconscious beliefs shape their decisions. You’ll gain clarity on their withdrawal patterns and learn how to respond in a way that preserves your emotional health.
You’ll learn:
✅ Why vulnerability triggers fear in Dismissive Avoidants
✅ How subconscious beliefs block them from pursuing connection
✅ The self-protective thought patterns they rely on when feeling threatened
✅ Why “it’s easier to be alone” becomes their default choice
✅ How shame wounds influence their ability to sustain closeness
Episode Breakdown:
00:00 – Intro
00:27 – 1. Dismissive Avoidants Are Terrified of Vulnerability
01:42 – 2. Dismissive Avoidants Are Constantly in Their Feelings, Minus Their Fears
03:03 – 3. Dismissive Avoidants Believe That It’s Easy to Be Alone
05:06 – Integrated Attachment Theory™ Certification
06:00 – 4. Dismissive Avoidants Lack Healthy Modelling of Healthy Relationships
06:57 – 5. Dismissive Avoidants Have a “Defectiveness” Core Wound
08:07 – Initiate the Conversation, Set a Deadline, and Vet the Person
08:52 – Conclusion
Meet the Host
Thais Gibson is the founder of The Personal Development School and a world leader in attachment theory. With a Ph.D. and over a dozen certifications, she’s helped more than 70,000 people reprogram their subconscious and build thriving relationships.
Helpful Resources:
🧠 Take the Free Attachment Style Quiz
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📚 Read the Learning Love Book
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🎧 Discover Podcast Episodes
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📝 Read the PDS Blog
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Understanding these dynamics will help you stop overthinking their absence and start recognizing what it truly means when a Dismissive Avoidant doesn’t chase.
