50. Beyond Mars and Venus with John Gray

Description

Today's guest is John Gray, the author of one of the top 10 most influential books of the last quarter century, Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus. He explains how to find a balance between our masculine and feminine sides, how to balance our hormones, and how to form and maintain a soulful, fulfilling, balanced relationship.

Connect With John:

MarsVenus.com
@MarsVenus on Twitter
John Gray Mars Venus on Facebook

The Mission Log:

[02:52] - It’s good to get good nutrition, John says, and explains how this relates to romantic relationships.
[03:51] - John clearly makes the link between nutrition and hormonal balance, and, in turn, to interpersonal and romantic relationships.
[06:57] - The social line between the sexes has blurred, but biologically and hormonally, we’re still distinct. John talks about the challenges and potential for fulfillment that come along with these changes, and mentions his new book Beyond Mars and Venus.
[10:11] - What’s John’s definition of masculine versus feminine? In his answer, John talks about testosterone and estrogen levels in both men and women.
[15:22] - John talks about how a combination of independence and dependence (or interdependence) looks in practical terms.
[17:05] - We learn how being a tyrant is a sign of a man being too far onto his female side.
[20:06] - The most destructive thing for a man to do in relationships is to express his anger and fears, or share his vulnerability, with his partner.
[21:30] - John discusses what it means for a man to be manly, or to be too far on his female side. He also talks about physical and emotional connections.
[26:30] - The real need for men is to feel successful, while for women it’s to nurture.
[29:26] - What can a woman do to connect to her feminine side?
[34:08] - John explains what vasopressin is, and the function it serves in men and women respectively.
[40:20] - How can a single woman find her anchor, security, and self-love in preparation for Valentine’s Day? John’s first piece of advice is to find a boyfriend, which you can do by lowering your standards. Focus on creating a lack of loneliness instead of looking for a soulmate.
[45:00] - The secret of learning how to communicate is for women to start sharing whatever they’re feeling, preferably with a man, but with a woman if you can’t find a guy to listen.
[46:23] - John talks about when a woman should have sex with a man. When you’re dating, don’t have sex to please a man; make him earn it. When you’re married, it becomes okay to have sex for him if his desire is stronger, but not in the early stages.
[49:05] - We hear about John’s daughter Lauren, who provides counterintuitive advice to women: don’t ask men a lot of questions. Let him be interested in you and bond with you by asking questions. Have opinions, but don’t just be opinionated.
[52:05] - The most important aphrodisiac for women is to relax. In terms of food, though, the best for women is beets, which contain lithium and therefore release oxytocin. John recommends watching the related video on his site for more information.
[55:45] - In the five days around ovulation, a woman’s estrogen levels double, increasing her need for attention, affection, romance, and touch.
[56:59] - John had Parkinson’s 16 years ago, but figured out a natural solution for it and restored his brain using super-minerals and amino acids. He then talks about the shakes he has formulated for men and women.
[60:59] - John’s testosterone levels now are 25% higher than they were when he was a young man, he reveals. For the average man at his age, testosterone levels are around half of what they were at a younger age.
[62:04] - What are John’s three tips for living a stellar life? 1. Single women on Valentine’s Day, plan a fun date with a girlfriend (or own your independent side). 2. Continue to grow in your knowledge and wisdom of how to love more and be loved more. 3. Have a mission and purpose, and get closer to it every day.

Your Pre-Flight Checklist:

Commit to improving your nutrition. Good nutrition contributes to overall good health, which helps you successfully create healthy relationships.
Read John’s new book, Beyond Mars and Venus. It addresses changing relationship dynamics and gender roles, as well as biological differences between the genders.
Women, if you’re feeling overwhelmed, it might be because you’re leaning too far toward your masculine side. Relax and rediscover your own femininity.

Listen

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The Mission Log:

Your Pre-Flight Checklist:

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