[Intro]
911, what's the nature of your emergency?
Ashlie: Welcome back to another episode of Tactical Living by LEO Warriors. I'm your host, Ashlie Walton.
Clint: And I am your co-host Clint Walton.
Ashlie: In today's episode we're going to talk about why it's so important for women to make their men feel like their king and why it's even more important in my opinion for men to make your wife or your girlfriend, significant other feel like your queen. So just sit back, relax and enjoy today's content.
Clint: Now Clint didn't come into my family easily. I say that because I grew up in a home with five brothers. I am the only girl and I was surrounded by more love, attention, affection, gifts, surprises and really co-dependency than most people and I couldn't be more grateful for that. But in saying that coming into my family and asking my dad to marry me, I would imagine was probably one of the most difficult things for you to have had to do. And I say that because even to this day my dad still calls me his princess and I know if I was a fly on the wall during that conversation, my dad probably would have instilled into you the fact that the only way that this would work is if you made sure to treat me like a princess the same way that he always has.
Ashlie: Yeah and I still remember the conversation and where we were and everything surrounding it to this day and I remember one thing specifically that your dad brought up is, I better take care of you as well as he has. And that's always stuck with me. But I've always set a goal for myself to take care of you better. And in that I find it to where one, it makes me feel good to know that I'm taking care of you, but I'm also honoring your dad's wishes for you through his eyes.
Clint: And I'm sitting right next to Clint and I had to look away just now because he's looking at me directly in the eyes and as he's telling me this. And I know that as he's saying it, it comes from a place of the most genuine source and anything that he does, it's not to try to pretend like he is doing things to make me happy or saying or acting in a certain way because he thinks it will make me happy. He genuinely picks up on these cues throughout the day to where he'll do the most random little things that I appreciate so much. And it's because of the attention that he pays into those things in our day to day living that he's able to pick out the things that he knows are going to show me love in the best way possible and as a woman, like as a young girl before we got married or even during you know the who are planning the wedding and everything like that. My dad is a contractor he literally built a stage on top of his bar and had his carpet guy install a red carpet for us to walk to down. And yeah we got married at my parents house on top of his spa. It was actually the most beautiful wedding I've ever been to. And every girl wants to be that princess. But she doesn't just want to look the part, she wants to feel the part. And my dad always showed me that, he's still always makes me feel like his special girl and in getting married and then realizing that whether we want to believe it or not many of us as girls look for those same attributes in the man that we want to marry. We hear it a lot in how men oftentimes seek women that have some of the same virtues as their own mothers. And I think that there's some validity in saying that because I needed a strong protector. I needed somebody to show me endless love that was just pure. Like the same kind of love that my dad showed me as his kid. And Clint you do that constantly. You do such a good job at making me feel like you're queen. You hold me up on this pedestal but not in a way to where I'm any better than you. But in a way to where you can love and honor and respect me in the same way that I know I try every day to do for you. And you absolutely do. And I don't say it enough to you how much I do appreciate everything that you do for me and how you approach everything in our lives. You deal with my knuckleheadness. But it's something that you've come to enjoy and love about me. Even though it irritates you sometimes. You love my whole package of who I am and you are that sunshine in my day in and I strive for everything I can do to make sure you're happy and in turn you do the same for me. And neither one of us is doing it in a expectation or of sense of entitlement. We do it because we truly love one another. And you're, your way about you is, you're such so much like your dad and you're so firm and strong in so many ways. But you had this softness about you that really just highlights everything that you are. And that's where I just love you with that.
Ashlie: I love you baby.
Clint: And as you're listening I did not intend for this to get this as mushy as it has. My intention is to be able to point out the fact that as a woman it has been so important for me and really this learning curve for me to understand that as you, as a man I need to do as much as I can to make you feel as strong and masculine and protective as you are.
Ashlie: And it's easy for us to just kind of bypass that and not verbally express that as a woman.
Clint: And something that's so important to us do you don't put me down and I see this in relationship after relationship that you know either we've coached through or we've just seen out in the world of the wife is just kind of dragging the husband along by the leash instead of walking side by side.
Ashlie: Or vice versa.
Clint: Exactly. And it's sad when you see that. But if it works for them great. But it's something we should all be walking side by side in our lives and building one another up. Not pushing someone down to either lower them down a level so you feel about them. But to bring them up to that level to walk with you.
Ashlie: For sure and we don't live our marriage in a way to where we ever compare ourselves to other people. We set the precedents for that during our premarital counseling. Really we've had so many long discussions about just being independent from the world as it pertains to our marriage. But it's definitely something that you notice when it starts tapping at you in this negative way when you see that negativity in other people's relationships. And for us because we're such people pleasers, especially as coaches we just want to help everybody. You know we just want to literally like take a cape and like shield them and they come here, let me just show you a different way. Because it doesn't have to be this negative emotion like as people are driving down the frickin road we see people arguing. We just saw it yesterday where their hands are up in the air, they're screaming in this closed car like, oh I can feel that in the car next to them. It doesn't have to be that way. It should not be that way ever. I can tell you right now Clint I have never once had it that way in our marriage. Because we're perfect? No absolutely not. But because we've used other tools to make sure that it never gets to that point, we have other points of release. We have other tools that we're able to use instead of this screaming match and then you have high blood pressure and early mortality rate and of course divorce and infidelity like all these other things that come along with that.
Clint: And it's that snowball effect. Because say just figuratively speaking with you, you yelled at me all the time. Well that would put me in an area where I closed myself off more and more and more over time because yelling doesn't get us anywhere.
Ashlie: And I think both of us Clint we have to admit like we're pretty lucky. Because I can't think of a single time where like Clint yelled at me or I can remember yelling at Clint and I don't like screwing around like.
Clint: Neither one of us are yellers. But I mean there are people who do.
Ashlie: Yeah. We actually have fun with stuff like that pretending like what did you leave this here for Mr. Walton.
Clint: Well and it's why you will play fight sometimes and we call her the fun police.
Ashlie: We actually physically play fight like wrestling on a couch or on the floor. And the fun police Clint's talking about is our oldest dog Bella.
Clint: She, if we start laughing and even to this day like as we record this podcast if we laugh too loud, we'll hear her barking downstairs and we're like oh jeez.
Ashlie: Little brat, extra editing.
Clint: I know.
Ashlie: But what I want to point out is really and in all relationships, not just your most intimate ones, that any relationship that you're in where you're physically communicating with somebody on a regular basis. What ways are you able to love honor and respect then and most importantly to show them that appreciation by doing something further than just saying hey thank you. Appreciate that. How about saying something like you know I noticed that you were able to clean out the fridge at work and I know nobody else has done that for a maybe a year. Like I think it's really cool that you did that. And I just wanted to point out to you and tell you that I appreciated that.
Clint: Or it could be something that they did for you and just really expressing your gratitude towards them. Whether it's expected or not expected, just showing your appreciation for subordinates or people even above you. Just for stuff that anyone do throughout the day.
Ashlie: And it doesn't necessarily have to be anything monetary either, like just a simple like expression. I just did this with somebody that I haven't yet done it with before. But I sent him a long text message about the things that I appreciate that he does in my day to day because I really value those things and I've said thank you thousands of times. But I've never elaborated on that. Thank you. And just by doing that one simple trick. Try to do it every day. Show somebody and tell them expressively why you love honor and appreciate them. Get creative with putting sticky notes on your kids mirror so they see it in the morning or in their lunch box. And like I say, it doesn't have to be like just your spouse. It could be any intimate relationships that you're in. When you're able to be comfortable enough to know that you do appreciate these things, that you learn the tool of being more expressive with it the relationships continue to grow and they deepen. And by having those deep relationships they become so much more meaningful. And that's what the world is all about is creating these meaningful relationships with one another. Really enriching what it is that you want to give to others and showing that gratitude any chance that you can and when you're able to do that you're really able to enjoy your Tactical Living.
Balance. Optimize. Tactics.
Hit that subscribe button so that you don't miss a day of the added value that I am dedicated to sharing with you weekly.
Let's Connect!
Email: ashliewalton555@gmail.com
Website: www.leowarriors.com
