Have you ever heard of the doldrums? Have you ever even seen the doldrums? Well, you’re about to!
The Bumperpodcast with Natty Bumpercar is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!
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Another story about saving baby animals!
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Natty Bumpercar 0:09
We haven’t had a beat like this in a while oh let’s just take this out all right here we go
Aloysius J. Pig 0:19
what a call me Allah wishes and I am a piggy I moved from the farm to the big city they will call my name but it ain’t no pity they call me I say hey pretty big he
Natty Bumpercar 0:27
asleep on the stream see asleep on the train? I know it sounds silly or noisy. But I worry where we weren’t going where I’m stressed why we were worried to the boiler room bro
Aloysius J. Pig 0:36
don’t worry just know that I got this
Producer 0:40
man forcing your life
or seeing your nose driving because I thought I’m a mental frog who would do this? Because everybody everybody who’s with me now everybody everybody who’s with me now no raise your hand up to this guy and turn
Aloysius J. Pig 1:26
my car on see people call me your highness. Don’t get it twisted, bro. I’m just worried about I’m allergic to shyness which is
Producer 1:35
priceless. Price hurt. Everybody knows us priceless.
Aloysius J. Pig 1:39
egg sack to mouth Dow
Producer 1:43
soaring in Europe in the car because I can think this year my addicted to sugar. That’s why I’m so sweet. I love fruits and veggies. I never eat meat. On the sidewalks. The bikes go on street they stopped any snow. They covered stuff. When I’m rocking the mic, you know rock beats
Aloysius J. Pig 1:56
actually impressed? I’m very impressed. Very impressed. Very impressed with you. And all the rides and the music stuff you do. You’re given an array can take no more. Okay, better stick around for what we have in store. Oh, oh, oh.
Natty Bumpercar 2:29
1234 Holy, that was such a great way to kick the summer doldrums out. Thank you, ah, normally, every year that I’ve been doing this, which is over a decade now, August into September is brutal. And we only record like, a half an episode, if even that, and this year, you know, I think we did miss a couple of weeks because we were at the beach and whatever. But like, it’s I think, you know, we made up for it with this amazing song. I don’t, I don’t know if that’s like, just the podcast, or just everything, you know, like, you grow up, and you have your seasons, and you have your summer, which comes around and it’s ingrained on us as kids that summer is this magical time and you’re not in school, and you get to go and have all these adventures and you’re going on vacation and you’re hanging out with your friends, and you’re in the pool. And then the summer comes to a close, the summer comes to an end and you get sad. And things start to slow down and you kind of start to get a little nostalgic, and you start to look back on the things you did this summer. And, and maybe the things you missed out on and the things you used to do during the summer. And you know the things that you you miss from from from the past. And then maybe you get a little bubble of nerves that you’re going to be going back to school. And and you don’t know who’s going to be in your class and who’s who’s who’s going to be your teacher? And What room are you going to be in and what are you going to wear and what are you going to learn and what if you can’t learn it and then it becomes like this big well of anxiety and, and nerves. And it’s so different from the summer where everything is is easy, and fun and light knits you’re going back to structure. And some people do pretty well with structure. I sometimes do. But a lot of the times I don’t my brain just doesn’t seem to be able to make sense of structure, mostly because it’s a structure that someone else has invented for their minds. Does that make sense? The people who make structure, for the most part, are making structure that makes sense to them. And a lot of the times that structure makes sense for a lot of other people, but then there’s a lot of other other people that it doesn’t make sense for. And so, if you’re on the outside of the structure that’s been created, then you’re gonna be confused, and maybe even bemused. And several other used uses, probably, and, you know, for those other other people, then you have to find your way. And sometimes society isn’t super awesome at making roads or paths or ways for the other other people to pick up or figure out how to interact or to deal or to live within or just to be in in the structure. And unless you have on understanding helpful stewards to help you through all of that, then it becomes very difficult. And you spend a lot of time seemingly fighting against the structure. That’s what people sometimes think they go, Oh, why is this person fighting against the structure? Why can’t they just be normal? Oh, why can’t they just be part of the, of what everyone else is doing getting step getting in line? Is they don’t understand that. to that person, that line doesn’t make sense. to that person. What you have written up there on the board? Doesn’t make sense. I mean, that person is looking at it, that person is trying to make sense of it. But it just doesn’t work. It’s not seeming to make any sense to, to to their brain. And by they I am I mean, me, but a lot of other people too. And that’s okay.
Man, my opinion. Everyone is everyone, everyone’s individual, right? Everyone comes from things from different directions. Everyone has different experiences in their life. Everyone has different perspectives. And that’s what makes the world awesome. If everyone saw things in the exact same way, and everyone did things in the exact same way, well, then where were the fun in that be? Going to mix it up a little bit every every so often. But here’s the thing. Sometimes when you mix it up, the people who are used to the structure who liked the structure, get upset. They’re like, hey, stop rocking the boat. Hey, stop doing what you’re doing. Because what you’re doing is antithetical to what I’m doing near like, I’m sorry, I wasn’t trying to be antithetical. I was just doing what I thought was the right thing. What I thought was what I was supposed to do. Well, it’s not. Do you ever get that to ever feel like you’re doing what you think is supposed to be done? What you think is supposed to be right. And then out of nowhere, you get walloped. ballyhooed knocked about, hey, what are you doing? And then you’re like, Oh, no. And then you kind of stopped and you’re like, oh, maybe I don’t know what I’m doing. Maybe I don’t know what I’m supposed to be doing. What do I do? What do I do? And then you hear the phrase you like a deer caught in the headlights. All the other days. I heard somebody say, oh, it’s like a squirrel caught in the headlights. And I was like the squirrels also get going down lights. And I was like, why did we settle on deer? Like, are there a lot of animals that get stuck in headlights? If I were to be honest, I’ve seen people humans that are on the road that get you stuck in the headlights. I really think a lot of animals if there’s a vehicle coming towards them, and there’s headlights that are very bright and that are flashing at them. I think that the people are going to get caught in those headlights is all I’m saying. All I’m saying I don’t know why we had to put it on the deer. They did. I mean, you know, I’m not gonna and maybe there’s some deer who are fine with lights. You know, I’m not I’m not going to just put all deer into one bucket has always been a funny thing. Going back to the conversation we’re having before buckets pigeonhole. People love to put people in buckets because buckets makes sense. Oh, you’re this type of person. Oh, you’re that kind of person. Oh, you go over there. That’s what you fit into that bucket. But sometimes, and most times, I would say, people are made up of several buckets. You know, and otherwise, life wouldn’t be very fulfilling, I wouldn’t think I don’t know. And sometimes the people with the buckets go, Whoa, you’re I said, you’re in that bucket. Why? What are you doing over here in these other buckets? And you’re like, I don’t know. I like to be in several buckets at once. And they go, Oh, no, my friend. No. Go get in your bucket. You know, and then sometimes, depending, you’ll go and you’ll get in that bucket for a while. You realize, ah, this bucket isn’t as fulfilling as I want it to be this book is it’s just not what I want. And then, you know, as you grow and you have more experiences, then you start finding your ways into other buckets, and exploring different buckets. And then you kind of get to do Do you I guess, as people say, I don’t know.
Aloysius J. Pig 11:29
Yeah, yes, Natty Bumpercar have in the jam of the summer the biggest Song of the Year. And then he turns that and he goes into some medical metaphysical talk about buckets. They should call you natty bucket calm No, like
Natty Bumpercar 11:49
I mean it’s funny but I don’t think I like natty bucket car but I don’t know you know, we’re having fun with the song and then I was just I just started thinking like I do sometimes my brain starts sometimes my brain starts thinking not all the time but sometimes
Rufus T. Rufus 12:04
now I just check the URL for not at bucket con someone has already purchased that and actually a selling wonderful little buckets here so I think we can just move along from the bucket idea. I think that’s not gonna stand I think you know, it was a good idea pig, but I don’t think we’re gonna fly with that
Aloysius J. Pig 12:20
one. Oh, well, well, at least we’re you know, we’re not going to have natty bucket QA, but at least we got that that hip hip jam from Ireland
Natty Bumpercar 12:29
jam.
Outro 12:42
The bumper podcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp with Natty Bumpercar and some of his pals. It is family friendly, clean and ridiculous. Thanks a bundle for listening. If you love our show, and you’d like to help support the podcast, check out our Patreon page at https colon forward slash forward slash www.patreon.com forward slash Natty Bumpercar also pretty please subscribe wherever you get your podcasts, share it with everyone everywhere. post about it on all of the social medias or leave a rating and review. The bumper podcast is produced at headquarters in coffee Ken alley. It’s recorded mixed and produced by producer. The bumper podcast features contributions from Aloysius jpg Rufus T Rufus doodle poodle, robot trunks and a gaggle of other silly rascals. Our head talker is probably Natty Bumpercar. We also have an absurd newsletter. Check it out and subscribe at Natty bumpercar.com/subscribe Also, you can follow me on Instagram and Twitter at Natty Bumpercar Hugs and hearts See you soon.
NonPro 14:01
This has been a non productive media presentation, executive producer Frank Blaue. This program and many others like it on the nonproductive network is distributed under a Creative Commons Attribution non commercial no derivatives license, please share it but ask before trying to change it or sell it. For more information visit non dash productive.com
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
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In this episode of the Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar returns from his annual Cape Cod vacation with tales of ocean terror. After resolving some technical audio issues, Natty shares his anxiety about recent news reports of great white sharks and dangerous Portuguese man-o-war jellyfish invading the Cape Cod waters. He recounts a traumatic jellyfish incident from years past involving his son and reflects on the challenges of explaining ocean dangers to children. With his characteristic humor, Natty imagines the social lives of man-o-war creatures and their unwieldy 30-foot tentacles, compares them to wedding dress trains, and even pitches a jellyfish horror movie. Despite the fears, the vacation was wonderful, and Natty encourages listeners to be kind to everyone—even man-o-war.
“There's no dancing going on on these boards. What are you going to do? I'm going to go out and boogie in the waves. Okay, with my board. Ah, it's a boogie board.”
— Natty Bumpercar
“This creature doesn't even have time to say of. Oh, man-o-war. And it's kind of like a jellyfish, but it's evidently not a jellyfish.”
— Natty Bumpercar
“If you see a Manowar coming down the street at you, you can give them a little hi, how you doing, little wave, and avoid the tentacles. Don't high five them.”
— Natty Bumpercar
Topics: #vacation #capecod #oceansafety #jellyfish #parenting #beach #familyvacation #marinelife
Featuring: Natty Bumpercar, Producer, Robot
“There’s no dancing going on on these boards. What are you going to do? I’m going to go out and boogie in the waves. Okay, with my board. Ah, it’s a boogie board.”
— Natty Bumpercar“This creature doesn’t even have time to say of. Oh, man-o-war. And it’s kind of like a jellyfish, but it’s evidently not a jellyfish.”
— Natty Bumpercar“If you see a Manowar coming down the street at you, you can give them a little hi, how you doing, little wave, and avoid the tentacles. Don’t high five them.”
— Natty Bumpercar
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | iHeartRadio | RSS | subscribe
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | iHeartRadio | RSS | subscribe
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | iHeartRadio | RSS | subscribe
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | iHeartRadio | RSS | subscribe
Natty Bumpercar: what is going on bumper podcast coutures it's me natty bumper car and this is the bumper podcast and i am so excited after last week's episode uh or yesterday whenever i don't know when you're hearing this but the last episode uh we were having some major audio issues evidently someone had moved the wires while we were on vacation and we came back and started recording and producer was having a tough time and he's actually uh under the board right now kind of trying to uh make sure everything is set as it should be but everything we're seeing everything we're hearing right now uh it seems good so yeah we were on vacation we went to a place called cape cod i think i mentioned that and uh it was been going there for 12 years and it's a very nice place and it's a wonderful vacation but uh this year leading up to vacation uh you know how it works like you're anticipating something you're excited for something um you're have expectations like oh we're gonna go to the beach it's gonna be relaxing it's gonna be fun there's gonna be family there it's gonna be sun we're gonna get ice cream all these things we're gonna go in the in the water and boogie board uh and which I kind of now want to know the etymology of boogie board. There's no dancing going on on these boards. What are you going to do? I'm going to go out and boogie in the waves. Okay, with my board. Ah, it's a boogie board. But this year, in the months, I'd say month, leading up to our big trip, the news reports were, it was great white sharks found in massive droves in numbers off the shores of Cape Cod. And I was like, oh, that's where we're going. Okay, that's kind of weird. That's a little scary. But we've been going there so long, and we've kind of done our research, as it were, and know that kind of where we are is generally not where they're talking about. There's a… Another side where there are more sharks because they go there to visit their seal friends. All their friends who are seals are on the other side, and the sharks typically like to go over and hang out with them. They're like, hey, seals, do you guys want to play pickleball? And the seals are like, or whatever the seals say. And then magic happens. So I was moderately okay with that. Now… This year, there was a wrinkle thrown into the news reports where there was actually something else in the waters, something insidious, something evil, called a man-o-war. Not even a man-of-war. No, no. This thing, it actually has an apostrophe in its name, like if you're going down to O'Callaghan's to have a lovely drink and maybe some sort of… What kind of food? Shepherd's pie. There we go. So man-o-war. I mean, this creature doesn't even have time to say of. Oh, man-o-war. And it's kind of like a jellyfish, but it's evidently not a jellyfish. But it has these tentacles that are, it said, can be up to 30 feet long. So if there's a jellyfish type of organism in the water that's 30 feet away, I'm not going to see it. I'm not going to know it's there. So I could be out, you know, gallivanting in the waves, maybe doing some boogie boarding, whatever I do, and then all of a sudden, zap, zap, zap, zap, and then you're in pain, and then everything is miserable. And so, and the evidence, you know, like they, it was, I forget what the word they used, but it was like droves or large numbers of man-o-war. And then they showed the beach, like they highlighted, they pinpointed the beach where these creatures were, and it was like next to our beach. And so, and I don't feel like, you know, so if it was next to our beach, I don't feel like, you know, man-o-war are the type of creatures, they're like, you know what, we're just going to go to beach A today, and we're going to stay there. We're not going to go over to beach B. We're not going to, I think they might drift. I don't think that they're going to stay at one beach. You know, beach C has wonderful lunch options, but I think we're just going to stay here at A. No, they're going to be like, you know, we're in the ocean. We're going to go wherever we want to go, and it's fine, because we're man-o-war. And that's, I feel like, how they sound as they're floating around with their 30, who needs 30-foot-long tentacles? Like, what are you doing with those? Can you imagine 30-foot-long tentacles? Hey, it's Friday night. Hey, the man-o-war are going to get together and go out to some parties, and oh, how long is it going to take for them to get the tentacles done? You know, to get to, are they going to curl them? Are they going to, I don't know what man-o-war do with their tentacles, but it just seems like, it seems unruly, you know? Like, you ever see at a wedding, at a royal wedding type of thing, and there's like a princess, and she's got a wedding dress on, and sometimes behind a wedding dress, I guess it doesn't have to be a wedding dress, it could be any dress, but they'll have a thing called a train, and that's that long thing of fabric that goes behind the dress. There's a train behind you. Is that what it's like for the man-o-war? There's just a train of icky, mean, spiky, I don't think they're spiky. They're just gooey, right? I don't know. So, but it brought back terror, because a long time ago, I want to say like eight years ago, so my kid would have been how old? Much younger, that's all I know. But he was out in the water, and it wasn't a man-o-war, it was actually jellyfish, and he got zip-zap, zip-zap, and there's nothing more terrifying to a child, or I mean, you know, mostly a child, but I think regular, just older people too, but to be in the water, having the time of your life, it's so freeing. There's the sun, there's seagulls, there's all my, you know, cousins. I'm having a nice time, and then zip-zap, and you're in pain, and the way that jellyfish, I don't know if you've been stung by them, but I hope you have not, but if you have not, I'm going to tell you about it. Their little tentacles wrap around, so he had lines around his legs with like red dots, like, you know, every inch or so, zip-zip-zap-zap-zip-zip-zap-zap, and he, I mean, I had to rush in to get the child, and then we got him out, and we looked at it, and then you're trying to figure out, it says, oh, what is it? It's not vinegar, it's not alcohol, it's, I forget what it's called exactly, but you have to put stuff on there to, oh, ammonia, that's what it was. You have to put ammonia on there to make the hurt go away, basically, but we didn't happen to have any ammonia handy, and so then we had to rush him over to the drugstore, and, you know, and, you know, it's that fun thing where you run into the store, and you're holding the child over your head, kind of like Simba was being held in The Lion King, and you're just like, how do we fix this? Because the child is screaming and crying, and we've put ice packs on his legs, and, you know, just done everything we can to try to make him feel better, and they actually sell, like, jellyfish kits, you know, like fix-fix-fix-em-up, quick fix-em-up kits, and, you know, whatever it was, we put it on there, and it did make it better, but then the child's traumatized. You know, you're looking out at the ocean, and you're like, that's not the nice place that I thought it was. That's not my happy place. There's evil out there, and that evil wants to wrap its tentacles around me, and zip-zap, zip-zap, zip-zap, zip-zap. So, you know, that changes a lot of things. It's a real life lesson. Hey, the water's not all good. Don't go see Jaws. Don't do it. It's about a mean, mean shark. You know, I'm surprised they haven't done a jellyfish movie like that, or maybe they have. I don't know. I guess it'd be kind of hard, because, you know, Jaws, it's like, oh, yeah, there's that shark. I see him. But with jellyfish, you're just like, ah, I don't know if that's the one that zip-zapped me, because it's a jellyfish. They kind of look like blobs. Blobs of jelly, which is hard to be scared of, you know. Maybe it's not just, like, one jellyfish terrorizing a town. Oh, that'd be pretty amazing. Sir, we have that one jellyfish is back, and he's after this one family. He's got a bone to pick. No, that jellyfish doesn't have any bones. He's made of jelly. Like, yeah, that's what the town meeting would be. So, you know, fast forward. Now, we had that experience, the trauma of the jellyfish, and then we fast forward to, now we have Manowar. Manowar. I feel like, did Manowar eat Lucky Charms? I feel like they could. I feel like they should. I feel like, if I was a Manowar, I would certainly eat some Lucky Charms. But, so, you know, the kids are going out and about into the water, and, you know, there were tears, because I had to break the news, like, hey, we can go in the water, but there's this thing out there we've got to watch out for. And it's really hard, too, because you're like, watch out for what? Blobs of jelly that are 30 feet away from you. Well, that's not doable. So, you know, it's a little bit precarious. That's the kind of situation it is. It's a precarious situation out in the water with sharks and Manowar. But what we did is, we were smart. We were smart about it. If we saw a group of people out in the water, we were like, okay, that seems kind of safe. That's our people fence, right? I mean, I guess the Manowar could have thrown their little scary things in through the people and gotten us, but they didn't. So, we had a wonderful vacation, and we're thrilled to be back, and we're thrilled to be here in the Bumper Barn, and we're thrilled to be talking to you, and we're hoping that you are doing amazingly well, and that you are having the best, days of your life. Not days, day, right? I hope right now is the best. I guess it could be days. Whatever it is. Anyway, I am Natty Bumpercar. This is the Bumper Podcast, and, you know, go out there and do something nice for yourself. Do something nice for someone else. Even if it's a Manowar. Even if you see a Manowar coming down the street at you, you can give them a little hi, how you doing, little wave, and avoid, you know, if they wave back at you, make sure to avoid the tentacles, because you don't want those. Don't, don't high five them. Don't give them a handshake, because that's not going to end well for you. But, yeah, just, you take care, and I'll talk to you soon. All right? I'm Natty Bumpercar.
Producer: The Bumper Podcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp with Natty Bumpercar and some of his pals. It is family-friendly, clean, and ridiculous. Thanks a bundle for listening. If you love our show and you'd like to help support the podcast, check out our Patreon page at www.patreon.com Also, pretty please subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. Share it with everyone everywhere. Post about it on all your social media. Or leave a rating and review. The Bumper Podcast is produced at headquarters in Coffee Can Alley. It's recorded, mixed, and produced by producer. The Bumper Podcast features contributions from Aloysius J. Pig, Rufus T. Rufus, Doodle Poodle, Robot, Trunks, and a gaggle of other silly rascals. Our head talker is probably Natty Bumpercar. We also have an absurd newsletter. Check it out. Bye. Check it out and subscribe at nattybumpercar.com slash subscribe. Also, you can follow me on Instagram and Twitter at nattybumpercar. Hugs and hearts. See you soon.
Robot: This has been a non-productive media presentation. Executive producer, Frank Hablawi. This program and many others like it on the non-productive network is distributed under a Creative Commons attribution non-commercial no derivatives license. Please share it, but ask before trying to change it or sell it. For more information, visit non-productive.com.
