I thought about starting this post with some overused Easter pun like, "We've got an 'egg'cellent show today!" But that would just be lame. Plus, although this show falls around Easter, it's not really an 'Easter show' per say. Mike, being the spiritual fellow he is, is out this week. So our good pal Chad sits in. And we can not shut him up. Chad takes over the entire show and doesn't stop talking. He's the most boisterous guest host we've ever had... once again, sarcasm fails to convey via text. Chad says like 3 things the entire show. What does he comment on? Here's what's in the lineup.
Kohler has unveiled a technological marvel of human waste disposal. It's called the NUMI, and it is perhaps the most advanced toilet ever conceived. I would say it does everything but wipe your ass... but it actually does. To be accurate, there's no robo-arm that reaches up to clear the spackle. But there is a robo-bidet that washes it away. For you uncultured folks out there, a bidet is a water jet that spritzes your butthole after you lay your Easter eggs in their watery basket. It leaves you feeling refreshed and mildly violated. Anywho, Kohler's toilet does it all... transforms, heats your feet and cheeks, plays music, lights up and more! Just make sure you're ready to drop some major bones on this throne.
From a place to shit, to a night out that went to shit; our next story tells the tale of 2 college students charged with theft after leaving a bar in Pennsylvania without leaving a tip. All the details are in this week's show. But simply put, they felt the 'required' gratuity on the receipt was not earned by their crappy waitress. As a result the police became involved. This leads to a lengthy discussion about whether or not tipping should be mandatory and shampoo. Yeah, tune in to hear that segue.
Bugs Bunny definitely took a wrong turn at Albuquerque. He and several of his Looney Tunes pals are getting a facelift, relocation and reboot thanks to CARTOON NETWORK. The show finds Bugs and Daffy as roommates. With its sitcom feel, the program's goal is to bring these classic characters into the 21st century. Unfortunately, I don't think their plan is going to work. And the guys agree. The show starts airing next month and I'll tune in to see the end result of 2 years worth of development. But I'm not holding out hope. This show, going off the promo clips on their website, reeks of DRAWN TOGETHER, only more slapstick. Fifty years ago, whodda thought perhaps the greatest cartoon characters ever created would eventually end up living in a neighborhood dealing with current-day issues in a sitcom/reality show spoof?
And in a move that could devastate the motion picture industry — and we're not talking about the next X-Men movie — the studios are in talks with cable companies to start offering theatrically released films on-demand, at home, just 2-months after they premiere on the big screen. That's 2-months shy of the normal wait period. As you might have guessed, directors aren't happy. They weren't consulted and are afraid this move could kill ticket sales and promote piracy. What do you think? Feel free to send us your thoughts. Michael Bay, James Cameron, Robert Rodriguez and several others have written an open letter to the studios begging them to not move forward. But as box office numbers continue to decline, as do DVD sales and more folks would rather see stuff for free online, because lets face it, movies these days aren't worth the $10, the studios are basically panicking. They, along with the directors don't seem to realize, shit in, shit out. This whole plan could and probably will decimate the industry's revenues. But then again, it could just be the proverbial bidet to clean up the shit.
