Happy April Fool's Day everyone. Hopefully you pulled a fast one on somebody you know. Hopefully they didn't punch you in the throat or otherwise cease associating with you. I'm gonna be honest, this year's show is half-assed... as compared to other holiday shows which are usually five-eighths-assed. It's also a testament that anything we cover on this show, good or bad, can easily be unbelievable. Due to some scheduling issues, we recorded next week's show right after this one. That means I had twice the show to put together last week. I was already running short on time, which means both this week's and next week's rundowns are a little on the skimpy side. I had asked the fellas to pitch in on sending me stories both true and false, but I got nothing from them. As usual with the April Fool's edition it's your job to figure out which stories are real and which are fake. What DVD releases could possibly be a joke? Was that E-Mail berating us a hoax? Play along won't you?
Like my CeeLo Green story from last week, I've got another intriguing tale to tell. No prank here. Listen in as I explain why I went to bed the morning of our Sunday netcast at 6am. The story also explains that stack of shot glasses you can find in our TwitPic feed. Trust me though, it goes deeper than just binge drinking. I perhaps made a new friend??? Question mark.
Only one of the new DVDs listed today is a faker. Surprisingly, the guys didn't call it out. Don't be fooled like they were!
What we all can only hope is an April Fool's prank, is this first story of the night. By now you've all heard of 'bronies' right? These are grown men who have a disturbing fascination with the MY LITTLE PONY toys and cartoons. You don't have to go far on sites like DeviantArt to find the creepy devotion these dudes have to their equestrian obsessions. Believe it or not, some of them draw elaborate scenes of the ponies engaging in sexual deviance. Many of the ponies are painted with anatomical accuracy. And if that's not enough, take the guy in today's story... he wrote an angry E-Mail to one of these artists demanding he stop creating pictures of one, Twilight Sparkle, a purple pony the man claims with which he's engaged to be wed. He doesn't like this guy drawing his "Twiley" in such compromising poses. He explains in great detail, which we talk about a little bit, about how she - A FUCKING CARTOON! - is represented in real life by a custom made plush toy that he cuddles and kisses. And although he doesn't mention it, I'm sure he fucks it and it's fur is probably crusty in some spots if you catch my drift. You thinkin' this is an April Fool's joke yet? God I hope so.
It's no secret that the Chinese love their tea. And like the skat from a civet cat used to brew coffee, they've got a tea made from the manure of something much much smaller... caterpillars. The bug poop tea is just one of many varieties of fermented teas they call Pu-erh (pronounced poo-air). This one is cleverly named, Poo Poo Pu-erh. See what they did there? Like this turd-tea, the story may be hard to swallow. Find out if it's the real deal!
Food can be a weapon. A finely sharpened carrot could stab somebody. A frozen chicken breast could be used to bludgeon. But what about a triangular flapjack? Before you jump to whether or not we're fooling you, hear all the flap facts.
And lastly, everybody loves a wedding. A happy couple, lots of food, booze, dancing and cake! Now imagine some nudity thrown into the festivities. Even better, nudity from a stranger! That's not good at all actually. Especially on grandma's weak heart. She's got the best view from the bride's side of the exposed sausage pressed firmly against the window. What makes this story 'unbelievable' is the flasher's name.
Stories aside there's plenty of other foolin' around on today's show. According to the ErrorFM chat room, Jabari would make a great little league coach. And hear about Dennis' fascination, not with ponies, but with wolves, as he stumbles upon a story about one in particular bent on escaping Yellowstone Nation Park.
As I mentioned, next week there will be a new show, just not live on Sunday evening. Download it Monday at 3pm/PT as usual. The live stuff returns April 14th. See you fools then!
