Gary and Selena kick things off with an illegally recorded (allegedly) domestic incident: a late-night Cane’s walk, a fanny pack, and Selena’s wallet trapped inside Gary’s purse… right when she’s on fumes with a massive work presentation. To make it worse, the chaos bleeds into the Johnjay & Rich podcast mid-recording, so everyone gets to hear the panic in real time.
From there it’s a classic Terrible Person spiral: Apple Pay vs adulthood, divorce jokes, dead-body beer coolers (funeral home lore), Liam Payne funeral timing, Netflix’s Logan Paul / Mike Tyson “fight” and why influencer careers are basically a countdown clock. Then they slide into the real dystopian stuff: Gen Z not driving, electric-car “range prison,” 15-minute city paranoia, Tesla death stats, and the CyberTRUNK—aka the rolling stainless-steel guillotine that might (in theory) claim a penis someday. They close by roasting Green Day, dunking on Florida insanity, and reminiscing about Key West Speedo-era Sugar Ray cosplay… before shoving you toward Premium where the episode actually gets unhinged.
