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Brides of FrankensteinLetterboxd Reviews, Part OneThis week is Ally's birthday, so the Brides are switching it up and goofing around by presenting a collection of Letterboxd reviews from each movie covered on the pod! There's really no structure to this one, gang - it's just Lindsay and Ally making each other laugh for half an hour, and really, isn't that what friendship is all about? Part Two coming soon!
Shoutout to the Dead Meat Podcast for giving Ally the idea to do this episode! You should go listen to their podcast, it's incredible. 2024-09-2627 minBrides of FrankensteinPearl: A Star is Born (?)Feel Bad Fall has arrived! Fire up the buggy and roast your finest pig, this week the Brides are recapping the 2022 instant classic, Pearl. Ti West's prequel, famously shot concurrently (and in secret!) to X, is a brilliant examination of slowly creeping psychosis as well as a loving tribute to the melodramatic, Technicolor extravaganzas of the 1930s and 40s. We chat about Mia Goth's absolutely bravura performance, the 1:1 comparisons between this film and The Wizard of Oz, and how this is a film about isolation shot in the middle of Covid. This movie is beautiful and horrifying, particularly in...2024-09-061h 30Brides of FrankensteinCatching Up: It's Been a Long, Long TimeAND WE'RE BACK!
This week, the Brides return to your ears and go over everything that's happened since the last episode dropped in December 2021 (what is time, anyway?). Alysa spills the tea about her recent wedding, Lindsay gabs about her awesome new promotion at work, and they give a few subtle (or extremely overt) hints about the upcoming season! Get ready for Feel Bad Fall!2024-08-2332 min
Brides of FrankensteinUpperUpper echelon where we belong2023-01-0701 min
Brides of FrankensteinThe Shining: Crazy from JumpThis week the Brides take a trip to the quiet, snow-covered, definitely not creepy at all Overlook Hotel for a spirited discussion on Stanley Kubrick's The Shining! A faithful adaptation of Stephen King's novel, this is not. And Kubrick's treatment of Shelley Duval on set was borderline abusive (maybe even just straight up abusive)? But The Shining remains a brilliantly unsettling journey into madness, as well as a harrowing depiction of a marriages' collapse. We also discuss the Escher-like construction of the Overlook, whether or not Jack Torrance being a gross monster from the beginning detracts from the plot...2021-12-161h 47Brides of FrankensteinPoltergeist: All Hail Queen ZeldaHALLOWEEEEEEEN!!! Today is the best day of the year, so the Brides are dropping one heck of a fun episode. Today we're going into the light and chatting all things Poltergeist! This is one of the rare horror movies that's both incredibly creepy and very, very funny, with a lot of surprisingly wholesome family dynamics. Perhaps that's because Stephen Spielberg wrote the script and also claimed he directed most of it (and then had to apologize to the ACTUAL director, legend Tobe Hooper). In this episode the Brides discuss how fun the family seems, how you always need to...2021-10-311h 35Brides of FrankensteinNosferatu: Nobody Looks Like a PersonIt's finally here - the most wonderful time of the year - SPOOKY SEASON HAS RETURNED! The Brides kick off their Halloween celebrations with yet another vampire movie, the brilliantly creepy Nosferatu! Released in 1922, F.W. Murnau's deep dive into German Expressionist horror is the first onscreen retelling of Dracula, even though the studio definitely didn't have the rights to Stoker's novel and got sued into bankruptcy by his widow. Seriously: Prana Films closed after this film because she gouged them with legal fees. And for good reason; it's Dracula. No question about it. This is a film we...2021-10-071h 21Brides of FrankensteinBram Stoker's Dracula: Baby Pizza PartyIt's Birthday Mandate time, and by Alysa's command, the Brides are dodging extreme acting and buckets of blood for a chat all about Francis Ford Coppola's 1992 epic, Bram Stoker's Dracula! Alysa shares how watching this movie's trailer at a very young age during a screening of A League of Their Own traumatized her for literal years, while Lindsay recaps her experience of watching it this week for the very first time. This movie is legendary for some of the most beautiful costumes ever produced for cinema and the most bonkers acting ever committed to film thanks to Gary Oldman...2021-09-231h 39Brides of FrankensteinThe Sixth Sense: Red Power Suit at a FuneralToday the Brides hang with some very needy ghosts who don't know they're dead - it's 1999's The Sixth Sense! M. Night Shyamalan has spent the last 21 years trying to live up to this film's extremely lofty expectations - sometimes it works out (The Visit), sometimes it doesn't (The Last Airbender, Lady In the Water, After Earth). But what works in this movie really, really works, in no small part due to the trio of performances that anchor the at times clunky script. And to think, Michael Cera auditioned for the role of Cole Sear. Along the way, we...2021-09-081h 37Brides of FrankensteinThe Purge: If Tumblr Wrote a Horror MovieThis week, the Brides get smacked around with a social commentary 2x4 as we try to find anything good to say about 2013's The Purge. You know a movie is awful when even the great Lena Headey and usually reliable Ethan Hawke can't save it. This movie is atrociously written, poorly paced, and its hamfisted attempt at SERIOUS MESSAGING ABOUT AMERICA is all the more infuriating when looked at in a post-2016 election lens. Also, WHY is the focus on the affluent white family when the film's commentary keeps insisting that they're the ones who don't suffer the worst...2021-08-151h 00Brides of FrankensteinFriday the 13th: Exposition DogIt's summertime, and that means a trip to Camp Crystal Lake! This week the Brides break down the unintentionally hilarious, still pretty effective Friday the 13th. It's got everything Halloween's got...because it deliberately ripped off Halloween. Let's face it, this movie is real silly and is mainly a vehicle for gory kills, but it can't be overstated how important Friday the 13th is to the creation of the slasher genre. Along the way we fawn over Tom Savini's makeup effects, consider the horny properties of religious hymns, and debate the effectiveness of Mrs. Voorhees trying to slap Alice...2021-07-291h 15Brides of FrankensteinThe Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2003: Sponsored by Hollister"The trailer is what I wanted this movie to be." This week, the Brides head back to Texas for a recap of the most aggressively "meh" film in our podcast's short history: the 2003 remake of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. This is one of the most toothless, gutless, boring entries in the early 2000s American remake-a-palooza (this is the one that started it all, so....you're welcome?). It's even more aggravating because the original film is so wildly unsettling and transgressive, and there's nothing unsettling or transgressive about this thing. Along the way, the Brides discuss the two or three...2021-07-141h 02Brides of FrankensteinJaws: Sharks Gonna SharkIt's a beautiful day, the beaches are open, and everyone is having a wonderful time! This 4th of July weekend the Brides are headed to Amity for the third season premiere, talking about all things Jaws! This movie is the big bad granddaddy of summer blockbusters, in which every single thing that could go wrong on a film shoot, did so in catastrophic fashion. Seriously, who thought to build a mechanical shark without testing it in the ocean? Along the way we discuss how this movie is basically a Law and Order episode starring a shark, the places this...2021-06-301h 31Brides of FrankensteinMidsommar: Gaslight Around The MaypoleLET THE FESTIVITIES BEGIN! This week on our season 2 finale, the Brides head to Sweden, trip out on some shrooms, and try to ignore the very large bear in our gleeful recap of the haunting, thrilling, and extremely satisfying 2019 'folk horror' film, Midsommar. This might be the most fun movie ever made about a Swedish death cult. Ari Aster is one of the most exciting horror directors working today, but unlike his debut film Hereditary, Midsommar doesn't make you want crawl into a hole and die. Rather, its excruciating portrayal of relationship toxicity makes the ending all the more...2021-05-271h 41Brides of FrankensteinInsidious: Make it Make SenseToday, the Brides are one hundred percent going to make sense of James Wan's 2010 film, Insidious. We swear. By the end of the episode, we will understand why this haunted house story turns in the last 40 minutes into a story about astral projection??? With a ton of ghost mythos that never fully gets explained???? And Lin Shaye wearing a gas mask to channel ghosts during a seance?????? We don't even know, guys - this movie is straight up the most frustrating we've ever covered, and we did Children of the Corn this season! But all that said, what this...2021-05-121h 52Brides of FrankensteinCabin Fever: Baby's First Script EnergyOh boy. On this episode, the Brides are taking a trip into the woods and dodging a flesh-eating virus and lots of early 2000s humor as we try to make heads or tails of Eli Roth's 2002 gorefest Cabin Fever. This movie doesn't quite know what it's trying to be - a parody of horror movies, a grimdark tribute to the movies Roth clearly loves, or somewhere in between. All we know is, most of it doesn't really work, and when it pays homage to classic horror, it does so with arrows and bold font. There are definitely other, better...2021-04-281h 31Brides of Frankenstein[•REC]: Crackle Movie of the WeekWe promised we'd be back in the realm of completely messed up and traumatizing films and we ALWAYS deliver! This week the Brides head to Barcelona and get stuck in the worst penthouse ever as we cover the 2007 found-footage masterpiece [•REC]! Found footage movies became almost a punch line in the mid-Aughts and 2010s, with the genre nearly over-saturating the market. But what makes [•REC] so different - and what makes its American remake, Quarantine, so disappointing in comparison - is its balls to the wall, take no prisoners commitment to scaring the every loving crap out of the view...2021-04-141h 33Brides of FrankensteinAliens: Humans are the Real MonstersFor the first time in Brides of Frankenstein history, the Brides are in disagreement about a film! Today we are taking a drop-ship to LV-426 (aka Acheron) to discuss James Cameron's 1986 beefed-up sequel to Alien, creatively titled Aliens. Let's be real: this is not a horror movie, and if you're looking for a direct continuation of the tone explored in Ridley Scott's OG masterwork, you won't get that until (ugh) Prometheus and (UGH) Alien: Covenant. But is this movie a crazy fun romp on its own terms? The Brides might not think so! We also debate the trajectory of...2021-03-311h 35Brides of FrankensteinPsycho: The Original IncelFinally, a movie that makes sense! This week, the Brides pull up to the Bates Motel for a spirited discussion on Alfred Hitchcock's seminal thriller, Psycho. We rave about the spotless editing, Anthony Perkins' legendary performance, the straight up hot opening scene, and obviously beautiful and iconic score by Bernard Hermann. I We also debate if viewing this movie through a 2021 lens makes Norman Bates look like a total creep even before the final twist, and the sheer pointlessness of the 1998 Gus van Sant remake. Honestly, this movie is a masterpiece, and if you haven't seen it yet, what...2021-03-101h 31Brides of FrankensteinIT Chapter Two: It's a LotThis week, the Brides are back in Derry and recapping the crushing disappointment that is It: Chapter Two! Man. This is one of the most woefully messy films we'll ever cover on the show, specifically because everything that does work gets swallowed up by over-zealous directing, a script stuffed full of bloat, and characters that didn't need to be here (seriously, why is Henry Bowers in this movie?!). Along the way, we cover the absolute pointlessness of the opening violence, the sheer majesty of Bill Hader and Jessica Chastain, and the Uncanny Valley effects used to de-age the younger...2021-02-241h 49Brides of FrankensteinIT Chapter One: Emotional TerrorismWelcome to the Losers Club! This week, the Brides head to Derry, Maine, to talk all about 2017's It Chapter One. Topics covered in this episode include: why this Stephen King adaptation works as opposed to Children of the Corn, the pitch perfect casting for the Losers, the tendency of director Andy Muschietti to go HUGE with set pieces and imagery, Henry Bowers' truly scary mullet, and the infuriating fact that a lot of the best lines of the film were improvised by 12 year olds (seriously, these kids have NO RIGHT to be this good). We also critique the...2021-02-101h 56Brides of FrankensteinChildren of the Corn: Made of CornThe Brides are back for season 2! This week, we get lost in Gatlin, Nebraska, and try to make even a little bit of sense out of the 1984 adaptation of Stephen King's Children of the Corn. Over the course of a purely chaotic hour we wonder who put Linda Hamilton in those unforgivable khakis, pick at the plot strands that go absolutely nowhere, and marvel at the clearly 35 year old 'stunt chest' in the church scene. Also, did you know that this film was supposed to be a metaphor for the Iranian revolution? Because we definitely didn't! Let's be honest...2021-01-271h 08Brides of FrankensteinScream: Don't Fear The CreeperOn this, our Season 1 finale, the Brides of Frankenstein celebrate Lindsay's birthday mandate with one of her favorite films, Wes Craven's Scream! We rave about the brilliance of the opening scene, the genius, bordering-on-unhinged performance of Matthew Lillard, the way the characters talk and how it mirrored the way we all thought we sounded as kids (which we did NOT), and how the costumer for Courtney Cox definitely wanted to make her look like a stick of gum. We also confirm, once and for all, that Billy Loomis is in fact the the creepiest, grossest horror movie boyfriend ever...2020-12-161h 49Brides of FrankensteinHellraiser: WAS HE WORTH IT, LINDA?This week, the Brides open Lemarchand's puzzle box and experience the limits of pleasure and pain as we explore Clive Barker's landmark 1987 bondage-fueled horrorscape Hellraiser. Along the way, we ask the truly important questions: Is this the horniest movie we'll ever cover? Did the term 'milquetoast' get invented for the character of Larry? Is any sexual experience worth what Julia does in this movie, but particularly, for a sleazeball like Frank? We also touch on the film's status as a queer artifact, the representation of healthy BDSM in media, and Alysa subjects Lindsay to readings from The Hellbound Heart...2020-11-251h 36Brides of FrankensteinThe Conjuring: The Patrick Wilson Appreciation SpecialThis week, the Brides celebrate the restoration of democracy to America by gleefully dissecting James Wan's 2013 demon-possessed masterpiece, The Conjuring. How is this movie still so terrifying, even after multiple rewatches? We also ponder why the actual Annabelle doll is in fact scarier than the Victorian demon toy in the film, and what made Ed and Lorraine Warren so utterly compelling as two of America's most famous paranormal experts - and the piles of evidence that suggests they weren't very helpful in their most famous cases. Then, Lindsay and Alysa share their mutual long-term love of musical theatre legend P...2020-11-121h 37Brides of FrankensteinBrides of Frankenstein Halloween Special: Trick R TreatOn this special 'live commentary' episode, the Brides watch the 2007 classic anthology Trick r Treat! Join us as we talk over this wonderful film that encapsulates some of the best things about this holiday. How terrifyingly adorable is Sam? How come nobody knows the rules of Halloween? Is the Brian Cox set-piece just a little too long? Is this the best werewolf storyline ever put on film? We also take note of the ways this film has not aged very well, particularly with Ronda and the way movies make neuro-divergent people into supernatural magicians. Also, we at Brides of...2020-10-311h 25Brides of FrankensteinHalloween 2018: Podcasters Ruin EverythingThe ooky-spooky season continues! This week the Brides head on back to Haddonfield to discuss the better-than-it-has-any-right-to-be 2018 sequel to Halloween, also titled Halloween! We explain how the script retcons everything past the original film AND nails Laurie Strode's trauma, and generally wax rhapsodic about Judy Greer's genius. We also bemoan the crazy amount of true crime podcasters that woobify genuinely unredeemable monsters (with some examples of true crime docs that get it absolutely right). And for the first time, the Brides have the same palate cleanser! It's a Halloween miracle!
BONUS: you get TWO bloopers this episode!2020-10-221h 25Brides of FrankensteinHalloween: The Autumnal Streets of PasadenaIt's the most wonderful time of the year! To celebrate the ooky-spooky season, the Brides are coming at you with THREE episodes this month! And we we had to start with a trip to Haddonfield. That's right, today we're celebrating the Daddy of slasher pics, John Carpenter's Halloween! We discuss what makes this movie so good (a holy combination of acting, directing, and Debra Hill), how every victim in this film is totally likable, the ways Carpenter honors the pagan roots of Halloween in his storytelling aesthetic, and why the Rob Zombie 2007 remake ruins what makes The Shape so...2020-10-071h 36Brides of FrankensteinThe Covenant: Brought To You By D.A.R.E."It's just a sea of butts." This week is Alysa's birthday, so she picks the movie - no vetoes allowed. The Brides head to Ipswich, MA, and attempt to make sense of the 2006 Renny Harlin bro-d out witchcraft movie, The Covenant. Did anybody know how homoerotic this was going to turn out? Why does this movie sound like a drug PSA but with witches? Does the director know any human women? Why is the movie shot through a blue iPhone filter? Why is the mom quasi-hitting on the son? What makes a movie good-bad, or bad-bad? Also, we delight...2020-09-241h 27Brides of Frankenstein5. The Texas Chain Saw Massacre: #FREELEATHERFACE"I did not enjoy watching this." This week, the Brides gnaw on some homemade headcheese and get delirious with heat stroke as we discuss one of cinema's sweatiest films: Tobe Hooper's The Texas Chain Saw Massacre. Along the way, we touch on the truly horrific conditions of the shoot, how one of the best shots in horror almost didn't make the cut, and Hooper sincerely trying to get this movie rated PG by the MPAA. (No joke.) We also go into detail on one of the inspirations for the film, notorious Wisconsin grave robber Ed Gein. We wrap things up w...2020-09-101h 25Brides of FrankensteinAlien: LEAVE THE F*****G CATIt's an extraterrestrial body horror extravaganza! This week, the Brides board the Nostromo and recap/discuss Ridley Scott's 1979 sci-fi classic, Alien. Why do people ignore quarantine protocol? Is Ash's secret a worthwhile addition to the film? Could all of this have been avoided if everyone listened to Ripley? (Yes.) We also engage in the obligatory "H.R. Geiger's house of steampunk organs" conversation, and debate which movie has the scarier premise: Alien, or The Thing? We round things off with some palate cleansers, and of course, the blooper reel!
This episode is dedicated to the memory of o...2020-08-261h 36Brides of FrankensteinThe Thing: Body Snatchers on IceThis week, the Brides lean all the way into isolation and head to Antarctica to recap John Carpenter's 1982 sci-fi thriller classic, The Thing. This movie has everything - tone, tension, brilliantly placed humor, exploding eyeballs, a head that turns into a spider, even computerized chess. It's all here! Plus, Lindsay has a lot of opinions about the critical response to the film and celebrates the best dog acting ever put to celluloid, and Alysa tries very hard to not just scream about Kurt Russell for an hour. She only barely succeeds. This episode is of course in tribute to the...2020-08-121h 39Brides of FrankensteinThe Evil Dead: Three Stooges But Make it SatanThis week, the Brides pop in Sclera lenses, load up on Karo syrup, and open the Necronomicon in our gleeful recap of Sam Raimi's beloved demonic gorefest The Evil Dead. We discuss the brilliance of Bruce Campbell, the sheer nightmare that was this film's production, and how Raimi's background as a magician helped him pioneer some of the coolest looking shots in horror film history. We also touch on the history of the film as a "video nasty" and discuss the very good and very gross 2013 remake. Stay tuned at the end of the episode for a blooper, in which...2020-07-291h 44Brides of FrankensteinSuspiria: Put Tilda Swinton in EverythingThis week on our first official episode, we tackle the 1977 Dario Argento classic, Suspiria, as well as the fantastic 2018 Luca Guadagnino remake of the same name. What makes a remake good? Why are the magical rules at the end of the movie? Why does Mother Markos look like Pizza the Hutt? And does Alysa's impression of Madame Tanner sound like Italian Dracula or Chef Boyardee? Stay tuned at the end of the episode for a special bonus clip, in which we imagine Tilda Swinton playing a variety of other roles. Crank up the Goblin, put on a dance unitard...2020-07-151h 37Brides of FrankensteinEpisode 0 - What Is This?In which the Brides introduce themselves, their love of horror, and their long friendship that hearkens back to the glory days of Livejournal. Plus, Lindsay and Alysa admit their love of Basic White Men. 2020-07-1147 min