Shows
Gentle ManMale Performance Anxiety - How I Deal With ItAudio from the YouTube video - watch here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gtVSKVI5nAYThe typical response to men experiencing performance anxiety is "deal with it! Take pills. Study Tantra. It's your problem." Today's rumination is all about whether we have to take responsibility for our performance at all. Intimacy should be about celebrating - and not judging - each other's pleasure. This offers a different way of working with it.Apologies for the audio issues. I'm still ironing out my setup with OBS. You'd think it would be simple, but... apparently it...
2025-08-0346 min
Gentle ManThe Male Loneliness Epidemic - Causes and SolutionsIt’s official – men are in a loneliness epidemic. Equimundo recently published its “State OfAmerican Men 2023” report, showcasing some alarming statistics related to men’s social and mental health. Some of the most striking statistics: 40% of all men show depressive symptoms; 44% of all men had thoughts of suicide in the prior two weeks; 65% of men aged 18 to 23 say that “no one really knows me well” ; 48% say their online lives are more engaging and rewarding than their offline lives ; and almost 30% of younger men reported not spending time with someone outside their household in the past week.
2023-12-2842 min
Gentle ManVideogames and their Role in Male Violence - Robin NelsonGentle Man is proud this week to host a longtime collaborator, Robin Nelson. Robin is a podcaster and lifelong enjoyer of videogames. We discuss videogames and their role (if any) in perpetuating real-life violence. We examine how gaming intersected our other childhood influences and the role it plays in our adult lives. Robin also explores gun ownership and how gaming fostered that interest in him. This conversation is a critical meditation on the role that outside and media influences play on male violence.--Follow Gentle Man on other platforms:https://www.instagram.co...
2023-12-2054 min
Gentle ManMen's Anxiety is a Mask for Other Emotions with Shura Eagen, MS, LPCToday I’m thrilled to share my conversation with Shura Eagen, MS, LPC. Shura is a licensed therapist who works with men on a daily basis in a number of applied modalities. I invited her on the show to talk about the common issues she sees coming up for the men she works with. We discuss how men often experience unknown emotions as “anxiety”, and that befriending the sensations - rather than fixing them - is the way forward. We discuss the dynamics of partners in the home, dating in the age of digital loneliness, and raising children with more o...
2023-12-131h 11
Gentle ManThe Myth of Male Polarity - David Deida is Full of CrapToday we are discussing the (what should be) controversial topic of male polarity. This is a theory popularized by David Deida that states that masculine and feminine energies must be balanced and opposite to create attraction between people. In his book "The Way of the Superior Man" and through his teachings, David outlines how people can improve their relationships and their sex lives by adhering to the behavioral guidelines of the polarity they're trying to achieve. In this episode we cover why these teachings are problematic and how they are essentially a New Age repackaging of old patriarchal ideals...
2023-11-3034 min
Gentle ManInhabiting the Male Body - Why Many Men Feel ConstrictedThe rigidness of expectation on male behavior from our culture is mirrored in the rigidness in the bodies of men. We internalize messages about how we’re supposed to hold ourselves and act, and these messages literally shape our bodies. It can take a lifetime to assess and address the implications of this. When we are held back from expressing our authentic desires, we restrict the flow of our life’s force. When we allow social expectations to limit our behavior, we stifle vital parts of ourselves. This episode identifies areas in which this commonly happens for men and outl...
2023-11-1440 min
Gentle ManHow Shame Harms Men & 6 Ways To Overcome ItShame is one of the deepest challenges men face and one of the strongest reinforcing elements defining gender roles in culture. From the moment we are born and continuing on into our lives, we are exposed to shaming by our parents, siblings, peers, romantic partners and coworkers. Shame is so pernicious because it often lurks internalized in our own psyches – we may not even be aware of the original external motive that informed our negative internal dialogues. The amount of restrictions that shame places on men consciously and unconsciously is monumental. Working through shame gives men greater access to th...
2023-11-0354 min
Gentle ManWhy Men Feel Afraid to Share Affection & What To Do About ItAffection is something adult men often struggle to share with each other. We may feel comfortable showing it towards the women in our lives, whether it’s our spouses or kids or other female relatives. But many men, even those who are close in friendship or share familial ties, are loath to share much physical or verbal affection with other men. Many factors go into this, such as a pervasive culture of homophobia, memory of traumatic harm at the hands of other men, and lack of sufficient role modeling in the culture at large. In this episode we explore th...
2023-10-2627 min
Gentle ManMen's Wellness & What DNA Dictates with Sage LiskeyIn this episode, we’re honored to bring an interview with Sage Liskey, activist author and founder of Rad Cat Press. His work for the last many years has focused on wellness in many forms. Today’s conversation focuses on men’s wellness, from finding community to being in more direct conversation about changing gender roles. We explore reflections on dating in a contemporary feminist climate and discuss how education could better serve children and young boys. Sage has a wealth of knowledge on wellness that goes all the way down to the genetic level.--Sage...
2023-10-1458 min
Gentle ManMale Grief - The Lifesaving Medicine of GrievingMen often struggle to grieve. Grief is one of the most basic human impulses and imperatives. Without it, we will always on some level lead tortured or incomplete lives. Women in most cultures are more encouraged to feel and express grief, which helps them to maintain healthy emotional balance. Without this same encouragement and healthy outlet, men can become lonely, alienated and violent. Today’s show discusses the challenges of male grief and suggests some approaches to unlocking it.Also don’t forget to check out previous episode “Boys Don't Cry - How to Work With Feelings” for some...
2023-10-0437 min
Gentle ManWalking - Peer Pressure and Role Modeling in Male ViolenceSome would consider violence to be an innate male trait. Statistics would certainly seem to back up this hypothesis. The nature / nurture debate around this and many other topics related to gender continues. Today’s show focuses on the nurture side of the equation. I see a clear pattern of nurture towards boys and men that drives them in the direction of violence. In this episode I explore some of those patterns, and cover aspects of my own personal story related to male violence.--Follow Gentle Man on other platforms:https://www.in...
2023-09-3021 min
Gentle ManThe Cost of Privilege - Manhood and MonstrosityA lot of discussion is given to the cost of privilege for the underprivileged. Less attention has been given to the ill effects of privilege on the privileged. The assumption is often that men enjoy - and benefit from - male privilege. In today's episode I argue otherwise. The ways are numerous in which male privilege separates men and makes them feel like monsters. Many of the things men most need are obscured from them by the very privilege that is purported to make their lives better. A world without privilege is a better world for men, and a...
2023-09-2031 min
Gentle ManMale Body Dysmorphia - It Probably Affects YouToday the topic is male body dysmorphia - a preoccupation with or a belief that a part of the body is wrong or ugly. Men commonly struggle with dysmorphias related to their height, musculature, penis size, hair and other parts of the body. These are conditioned insecurities that rest upon a deep foundation of cultural expectations around what men should be and do. Today we explore these dysmorphias and how we can begin to understand and address them.--Follow Gentle Man on other platforms:https://www.instagram.com/gentlemanpodcast/https...
2023-09-0832 min
Gentle ManWalking - Self Care and why Men Need More of ItSelf care is near the top of the list of things men struggle with. We are raised in a culture that tells us we don't need it, and when it is clear that we do need it, we don't know how to do it. From going to the doctor, taking downtime and relaxing, having emotionally supportive conversations with friends – men struggle to do even these basic activities. As a result, men are more prone to negative behaviors and self harming behavior. This episode talks about these challenges and suggests some ways for men to get proactive about self care....
2023-08-3018 min
Gentle ManWalking - The Pressure on Men to Work and ProduceSociety is flush with the implication that men have to work, or produce something of value, in order to be respected as men. The idea of man as a machine of production has been around long before the industrial revolution – it likely dates back as far as the advent of agrarian culture, and perhaps further. As such, men are raised with the implicit imperative that they must work hard and be successful in order to be worthy. When men lose their livelihood or sense of purpose, it can come as a huge blow to their self esteem.Th...
2023-08-2217 min
Gentle ManBoys Don't Cry - How to Work With Feelings"Boys don't cry" is how the saying goes. Men have incredible trouble feeling their feelings, and it has huge consequences in their lives and in society. This episode covers how the messaging starts during infancy, how it gets perpetuated by peers in school, and how 'grown man' propaganda continues it in adulthood. Then we cover how men can start to get in touch with their feelings, and we explore methods that can concretely help to create safety and inspiration around exploring feelings.Follow Gentle Man on social media:https://www.instagram.com/gentlemanpodcast/...
2023-08-1633 min
Gentle ManMeeting the Challenges of Men Within and Without College with Dr. Arian MobasserToday we are joined by Dr. Arian Mobasser, neuro & behavioral scientist and coordinator of the Men's Resource Center at the University of Oregon, as well as cofounder of Circle Science. He has done men's work both theoretically through the lens of his research and pragmatically through his position at UO. In this episode we explore his deep insight into the world that young men navigate, both within and without the academic settings of colleges and fraternities. He shares how important it is to meet men where they are and to function from a fundament of understanding when doing social...
2023-07-2750 min
Gentle ManMan As Protector and the Warrior ArchetypeToday we're examining the role of the man as protector in society. We explore how the two current main cultural warrior archetypes – the soldier and the police officer – are both dangerous and lacking in necessary restraint, moral bearing and responsibility. Then we go into healthier ways that men can express the protector role in their relationships and communities.Follow Gentle Man on social media:https://www.instagram.com/gentlemanpodcast/https://www.tiktok.com/@gentlemanpodcastPatreon coming soon!#boys #men #manhood #masculinity #feminism
2023-06-3034 min
Luke Adler Healing PodcastThe Martial Art of Consciousness, Growing up in Ashram Culture and Leading Men's WorkArjuna Perkins and I grew in in ashram culture and discuss the struggles of integrating our spirtual lives into the world as younger men. We both share our expereinces of leading mens work and the deep desire men and women have for authentic relationships
2023-06-281h 12
Gentle ManChoosing Your Manhood, Hormones & Being a Seahorse Dad with Foster McKeonThis week we are fortunate to share a conversation with Foster McKeon, a trans man and seahorse dad who has deep learning and insight into the spaces between gender binaries. We explore how he conceptualized manhood during his transition and the surprising privileges he gained along the way. Then we dive into hormones and how they do – and importantly don't! – affect our behaviors. Finally, we explore the complex and rich experience of being a trans man giving birth (known as 'seahorse dads') and some of the social challenges therein.This episode also contains a deep rumination on male...
2023-06-211h 08
Gentle ManSpirituality, Clean Shame and Straight Relationships with Luke AdlerToday we are joined by Luke Adler, a bodyworker and spiritual healer with deep insight into men's challenges and their movement towards maturity. On this show we discuss key points in his childhood and adolescence that shaped his adult understanding of manhood and a spiritual life. We dip into topics such as reconciling assertiveness with gentleness, clean shame and what it looks like, and some of the dynamics underlying straight relationships between men and women.Find Luke online:The Luke Adler Healing Podcasthttps://open.spotify.com/show/6k6WH1tFeL7hWzJY6aKr8...
2023-06-151h 03
Gentle ManHomophobia's Toll on Straight MenToday's episode focuses on the toll homophobia takes on society, with a focus on its effects on straight men. The harm goes so far beyond the harm to gay and queer men. Straight men need to examine how they are perpetuating homophobic behaviors and how they can experience more pleasure, connection and wellbeing by escaping them.Follow Gentle Man on social media:https://www.instagram.com/gentlemanpodcast/https://www.tiktok.com/@gentlemanpodcast#boys #men #masculinity #feminism
2023-05-3027 min
Gentle ManBeautiful ManToday's episode tackles the vulnerable and complex topic of men's relationship with beauty and aesthetics. Men are encouraged away from aesthetic pursuits and towards concretely productive pursuits. This focus denies many men from experiencing beauty, or feeling beautiful. This in turn prevents men from experiencing pleasure and from exploring their tenderer selves.Follow Gentle Man on social media:https://www.instagram.com/gentlemanpodcast/https://www.tiktok.com/@gentlemanpodcast#boys #men #masculinity #feminism
2023-05-2041 min
Gentle ManWhy Men Die Sooner & Strategies for WellbeingToday's episode looks at men's health through the lens of average life expectancy. The episode is informed by this article in the Washington Post:https://www.washingtonpost.com/wellness/2023/04/17/mens-health-longevity-gap/Using the statistics in this article as a baseline, Arjuna explores the ways that men are not showing up for their wellness and self care. The episode lays out a number of ways men can create more wellness and resilience in their lives.Follow Gentle Man on social media:https://www.instagram.com/gentlemanpodcast/https://www.tiktok.com/@gentlemanpodcast
2023-05-1928 min
Gentle ManThe 4 Tenets of 21st Century ManhoodJoin Arjuna in going through his 4 Tenets of 21st Century Manhood. These are 4 categories that, when focused on, can help men transform their lives and their relationships. The 4 categories are:Do no harmContributeWork on yourselfDevelop social awarenessWhen men embrace and work on these 4 tenets, they will see huge positive change in their lives. They will start to feel like more responsible and empowered participants in their families, relationships, communities and workplaces.Follow Gentle Man on social media:https://www.instagram.com/gentlemanpodcast/https://www.tiktok.com/@gentlemanpodcast
2023-05-1833 min
Gentle ManIs Manhood Shrinking?Gentle Man returns – new, updated, reinvigorated! Today, Arjuna tackles the big picture question troubling lots of men: is manhood shrinking? Are the parameters of acceptable behavior narrowing in the wake of the #metoo movement and other 21st century criticisms? Are men less today than they once were?This show presents a counterpoint – rather than getting smaller, manhood is growing in the space it provides men to experience rich and fulfilling lives. Men today have more space to feel their feelings, express themselves, get the support they need and live healthier lives than they have at any other time...
2023-05-1828 min
AIPT ComicsZack Kaplan fights the future with 'Forever Forward'Visit our Patreon page to see the various tiers you can sign up for today to get in on the ground floor of AIPT Patreon. We hope to see you chatting with us on our Discord soon!NEWSDan Slott and Mark Bagley team up on ‘Spider-Man’ ongoing seriesNew X-Men 2099 team introduced in ‘Spider-Man 2099: Exodus’ #5The identity of the Symbiote Bedlam to be revealed in ‘Venom’ #9Comixology Head of Content Chip Mosher to step downMulti-immersive webcomic ‘DRAC: Son of Dante’ starts todayBlondie comics project gets a release date and new deetsMilestone Initiative’s Static to grace Alex Bowman’s NASC...
2022-07-031h 09
Gentle ManMen's Role in Society - What's Missing from the DialogueThis episode goes into what is missing from the cultural dialogue about what men need – missing not from the conversation entirely, but underrepresented by the main information outlets. With the advent of generations of young men growing up in the 21st century who feel the world doesn't have a place for them, a number of personalities and organizations are capitalizing on the trend to recruit from among these men. Organizations such as the Alt Right, and people such as Jordan Peterson, Ben Shapiro and Andrew Tate are appealing to this generation. To understand what's really going on, we profile wh...
2021-05-1128 min
Gentle ManGeorge Floyd - The Impact of Male Violence in PolicingOn May 25, 2020, George Floyd, a 46-year-old black American man, was murdered in Minneapolis by Derek Chauvin, a 44-year-old white police officer. This murder spurred huge riots, brought a resurgence to the Black Lives Matter movement, and was one of the more galvanizing events of the COVID era. In this episode we explore what police violence has to teach us about men's behavior. Male violence is a deep topic not easily understood by one point of view or one biological explanation. It has a long history and an unfortunately heavy precedent. We also explore the role of man as protector...
2020-05-2824 min
Gentle ManBeing One Of The Guys - Every Man Struggles With ItToday, we discuss what it means to fit in and be "one of the guys." There's a surprising amount of misconception when it comes to what this means or looks like. We take the example of a young trans man trying to understand what being "one of the guys" means to explore the broader conversation about manhood and male behavior.
2019-08-1427 min
Gentle ManMale (dis?)Empowerment – Incels and the Challenge of IntimacyHow can men wield power and yet feel so disempowered? Why do somany men feel threatened by the idea of women gaining power? This episode is a meditation on the nature of power and how it is healthily and unhealthily expressed. There is a power struggle, both real and perceived, happening in cultures around the world at this stage of human history. It is the struggle of women (and many other marginalized people) asserting their rights and their need for a greater consideration in cultural practice and public policy. Many organizations, such as the Alt Right in the Western...
2019-08-0224 min
Gentle ManThe Dangers of 'Man Enough'We hear it our whole lives – "If only you were man enough." This damaging phrase is at the heart of a lot of compensating – and ultimately harmful – behaviors that men exhibit. The suggestion that manhood can somehow be measured is as hurtful as it is ridiculous. It results in men who push themselves too hard, disregard their own needs and desires, and sometimes end up hurting others in the process. Let's dive into 'man enough' and see what's really there. And in case you didn't already feel this – you are already man enough.--Follow Gentle M...
2019-07-2223 min
Gentle ManEp. 5 - Boys Don't Cry"Boys don't cry" is how the saying goes. Men have incredible trouble feeling their feelings, and it has huge consequences in their lives and in society.
2019-07-0842 min
Gentle ManIn Defense of NiceToday, we explore the nice guy / asshole dichotomy, how it demeans everyone, and how misunderstood niceness is.
2019-06-1957 min
Gentle ManThe Pressure on Men to Keep It TogetherKeep it together, man! This is a common line we recognize from movies and popular culture. This week we explore how men are expected to be "the rock" in their work and personal relationships and keep it together. Many men feel a crushing pressure to perform at work and in their home lives. There may be no part of their lives where they feel comfortable letting go, or letting it all hang out. Today's show gives us permission to collapse every once in a while. To let the pressure off. To be imperfect. To be ok with not being...
2019-06-1615 min
Gentle ManMen's Groups - Why They're Critical to Everyone's WellbeingToday we're going over men's groups, exploring positive and negative opinions on them, and discussing their importance in the culture.
2019-06-1018 min
2019-06-0918 min