Shows
A Time to SharpenNeurodivergenceWe all think differently. But some of us think more differently than others…if that makes sense. Maybe it doesn’t. I don’t know. Which is why we invited Jonathan Page to talk with us about the very important, complex,, and sometimes uncomfortable topic of neurodivergence in our society and at Whetstone. From Autism to Tourette’s, to OCD and ADHD, we’ve seen it all in the 14 years and 150+ residents we’ve served since 2011. Mr. Page, which is what the boys call him, has learned the hard way about how to embrace his Autism instead o...2025-07-1448 minA Time to SharpenGrowing PainsSome of us are old enough to remember when Kirk Cameron was a teenage heartthrob and the star of an 80’s family sitcom called “Growing Pains.” This show was also notable for its catchy theme song and for the fact that it starred his TV father, played by Alan Thicke…who is the real-life father of Robin Thicke, the famous singer, producer, and now judge on The Masked Singer. None of this has anything to do with the topic of today’s podcast, except for the fact that it shares the same name and that it’s the first thi...2025-06-1351 minA Time to SharpenMarriage is HardIt’s impossible to overestimate the importance of marriage. Sure, some marriages fail, some are toxic, and some are even deadly. Still, there is nothing that has the power to build a person, a church, a community, or a nation like healthy marriages. Thing is, they take work. Lots of hard work, on both sides. A lifetime of hard work buy two people growing closer to each other as they focus on growing closer to God. Join us this week on A Time to Sharpen as we discuss how to stay married. It might...2025-05-1550 minA Time to SharpenSick & TiredFlu season is almost over, but if you hurry, there’s just enough to catch the seasonal bug if you want. You have until the end of May, in case you're interested. There’s really a lot to be said for being sick. It forces you to slow down. It teaches you how to be sympathetic towards others when you’re well. It jump starts your body’s immune system, which needs a good workout every once in a while. Of course, there are a lot of downsides as well. There are the obvious physical aches and pains, bu...2025-04-2340 minA Time to SharpenChildhood Bullying Pt. 2In part two of this special podcast dealing with school bullying, Axel, Brandon and Thomas share thoughts about the bullying problem, along with some simple, proven effective ways to address childhood bullying and some ideas about what could work as well.2025-03-3057 minA Time to SharpenChildhood Bullying: Pt. IWhetstone's Thomas Brown joins Brandon and Axel for the first of a two-part series on the subject of childhood bullying. Once a victim of terrible bullying, Thomas emerged as a three-decades filmmaker, educator, national speaker and consultant on a subject he knows all-too-well. Despite a frightening childhood filled with physical torment and ridicule, Thomas ultimately forgave his tormentors and moved on to a life-long mission, to realistically and creatively address the problem, utilizing his own film creations and a nationally-recognized program that put kids and adults alike, through a powerful and emotional experience....2025-03-0858 minA Time to SharpenLOL!Rules without Relationship = Rebellion. We’ve said this before on the podcast, but it bears repeating. Whetstone Boys Ranch was founded upon this basic assumption. Rules are necessary, but without a human being to explain, interpret, apply, and at times modify those rules, they become a formula for failure as parents, teachers, and counselors. Just watch any of the hundreds of dystopian television shows and movies that are currently streaming. They all demonstrate that rules can’t guarantee happiness. They can’t make people be good, and they can’t stop people from doing bad things. Join us...2025-02-2048 minA Time to SharpenSnowplows & HelicoptersBad parenting is often compared to snowplows and helicopters. There is a very strong temptation to rescue our kids from their mistakes: swooping in to save the day, or plowing a path so smooth that they never have to struggle. Every parent is guilty of it to some extent. First because the motivation behind these parenting styles seem so noble. And second, because the line between helping and enabling is the grayest of grays. It’s easy to miss because it’s hard to see, and because we don’t want to admit when we’ve crossed it. 2025-02-1846 minA Time to Sharpen'tis the Season?‘Tis the season to be over-working, over-spending, over-eating…and under-sleeping.
I don’t know about you, but I feel like the time between Thanksgiving and Christmas is probably the most stressful of the year…with the possible exception of the weeks leading up to April 15th.
What does that say about Christmas if the feelings it evokes rival those of falling victim to legalized theft. Throw in the unintended consequences of materialism and entitlement, and you have the recipe for something that tastes nothing like the holiday it was intended to be.
Join us this w...2025-02-1840 minA Time to SharpenNo Pain, No GainDid you know that the second Friday in January is known as “Quitter’s Day?” Studies have shown that by this day each year, 80% of all New Year’s Resolutions have been abandoned. I think one reason for this is that we don’t plan for failure. We tend to be overly optimistic about how easy it will be to start exercising or stop spending. Habits are hard to break. That’s why they’re called habits in the first place. Mike Tyson famously said that “everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face.” What ma...2025-01-0742 minA Time to SharpenA Holiday LessonIs there anything better than a good holiday tradition? Well, yeah, lots of things I guess. Two good holiday traditions…three good holiday traditions.Seriously though, join us this week on A Time to Sharpen as we discuss the 2003, Christmas classic, Elf, starring the great Will Ferrell. It’s a tradition for us to watch this one with the boys at the ranch, as well as with our own kids. It’s the perfect combination of good clean fun, romance, and for the purposes of this episode, therapy. Elf a surprisingly insightful glimpse into trauma and attachment. So...2024-12-1839 minA Time to SharpenMeet the Parents, VideoWhat’s it like to be the parent of a boy at Whetstone? There is really only one person who can answer that question. You guessed it. It’s the parent of a boy at Whetstone.
This week on A Time to Sharpen we have two such parents: JD and Kelly Buss, the mother and father of Joey Buss, one of our recent 2024 graduates. I feel certain that this podcast will be a huge help to parents looking to place their son in a program, parents living apart from their son who is currently in a program, and p...2024-12-0350 minA Time to SharpenMeet the ParentsWhat’s it like to be the parent of a boy at Whetstone? There is really only one person who can answer that question. You guessed it. It’s the parent of a boy at Whetstone.
This week on A Time to Sharpen we have two such parents: JD and Kelly Buss, the mother and father of Joey Buss, one of our recent 2024 graduates. I feel certain that this podcast will be a huge help to parents looking to place their son in a program, parents living apart from their son who is currently in a program, and p...2024-11-211h 25A Time to SharpenMeet the ParentsWhat’s it like to be the parent of a boy at Whetstone? There is really only one person who can answer that question. You guessed it. It’s the parent of a boy at Whetstone.
This week on A Time to Sharpen we have two such parents: JD and Kelly Buss, the mother and father of Joey Buss, one of our recent 2024 graduates. I feel certain that this podcast will be a huge help to parents looking to place their son in a program, parents living apart from their son who is currently in a program, and p...2024-11-2153 minA Time to SharpenTool TimeIn The Tech Wise Family, author Andy Crouch describes the difference between devices which do our work for us, and tools which allow us to work for ourselves. One contracts, the other expands. One makes us lazy and apathetic, the other pushes us to grow. One forces us to conform; the other helps us to become better versions of ourselves.
At Whetstone, our work program equips boys with useful skills that transfer into their world back home, allowing them to become servants and leaders. You can’t just push a button to build a birdhouse, mend a fen...2024-10-1740 minA Time to SharpenLet's Go To The Movies!Movies are a powerful tool. They have the ability to not just change people, but to change the world. The film industry proclaims and celebrates this power every year during Oscar season, up and down the red carpet.
So I’ve always thought it strange when some of these same people minimize the impact that exposure to profanity, sex, violence, and other unsavoryness has on the public at large. “It’s just entertainment,” we’re told. “Movies are just a mirror of society,” they say.
Whatever happened to all that talk about changing the world? You can’t have y...2024-09-241h 03A Time to SharpenSafety First“Safety first,” the old saying goes. And it’s true, it’s pretty dumb to ignore safety issues before deciding to do something potentially dangerous. But that doesn’t mean that a wise person will never attempt to do anything dangerous in life.
In fact, there are times when not doing a “dangerous” thing is more hazardous to our health. For example, sitting down all day seems like a safe thing to do, but if you’re not up and about, potentially tripping over stuff and bumping into things, you’re at a higher risk for heart disease, stroke, de...2024-08-2941 minA Time to SharpenVolunteeringWhat person in their right mind travels 9 hours in a cramped vehicle, with no Buc-ees between there and here, to work for 3 long days in hot, humid, 100 degree weather, battling sawdust, sanders, chainsaws, ticks, and chiggers, expecting nothing in return but the joy of lending a helping hand?
Whetstone volunteers, that’s who.
We’ve hosted 100’s of them over the years…probably 1000’s…I don’t really feel like doing the math, but it’s a lot.
Join us this week on “A Time to Sharpen” as we took a short break to interview Kevin and...2024-08-1239 minA Time to SharpenReboundingIn high school, Dennis Rodman was my favorite basketball player. Not because he dyed his hair pink, got married to himself while wearing a wedding dress, and became close personal friends with Kim Jong Un. Not that. Instead, it was because of his amazing hustle and unadulterated passion for the game of basketball. He was also one of the Detroit Piston “Bad Boys” who won back to back championships in 1989 and 1990. (We’ll pretend he never went to the Chicago Bulls.)
Dennis Rodman is probably the most unlikely player to ever end up in the Hall of Fame, a...2024-07-1246 minA Time to SharpenAdultingIt’s sad to see your kids grow up…but it’s more sad if they don’t grow up. That’s the conclusion I’ve come to with my four children. It’s my job to prepare them for life without me.
But what exactly does this entail? I don’t plan on going away anytime soon, but I don’t want them calling me up at midnight to ask if they should book the morning or evening flight to Denver. They should be able to make most decisions by themselves. And if they can’t, then I have done them...2024-06-1956 minA Time to SharpenSuccess RateWe often get asked about our “success rate,” as if the boys who come here are games on a schedule. People want to know our win/loss record. Is it above .500? Did we make the playoffs? If not, what coaches are we going to fire? What off-season moves are we going to make?
And I get it. I can be very results-oriented. But what exactly does it mean to be ‘successful’? Is it something that can be measured? If so, how? Should success be the thing towards which we strive? Or are other things even more importan...2024-05-2955 minA Time to SharpenYouth SportsSports, sports, sports…and more sports. We can’t seem to get enough. We have 24 hour coverage of every athletic competition across the globe. Sports on television, the radio, the internet. Then there is the conversation before, during, and after each individual event.
I haven’t done the math, but it would probably take a lifetime to consume just one day’s coverage of sports around the globe.
For some, this fact is just an annoyance. But for many others, this obsession with sports creeps into our family life. Wins and losses can affect people’s moods. Ov...2024-05-1547 minA Time to SharpenField TripsSir Isaac Newton observed that “an object at rest stays at rest and an object in motion stays in motion…unless acted upon by an outside force.” And while his laws of thermodynamics revolutionized physics, it doesn’t take a genius to realize that this is also true in our lives as parents, teachers, and counselors.
We tend to stick with the same old strategies we’ve been using because they are, well, good enough. If it ain’t broke don’t fix it, right?
That’s what makes taking field trips so difficult. They throw us out of o...2024-04-2540 minA Time to SharpenYou Are What You EatYou are what you eat. If you eat exclusively chicken nuggets, you’ll probably end up looking like a chicken nugget. Literally.
Remember the documentary, Super Size Me? That dude ate only Mcdonald's food for 30 days, and he almost died. It was crazy. Of course, anyone could have told you that was stupid, so I’m not sure why had to risk his life to prove the point that fast food is unhealthy; but it does illustrate the principle of “garbage in, garbage out” quite effectively.
Join us this week on A Time to Sharpen as we addr...2024-04-0541 minA Time to SharpenThe Whetstone WayWhat is the “Whetstone Way?” Well, to state the obvious, it’s the way we do things at Whetstone. It implies grit, determination, and a commitment to quality in all aspects of the program.
To paraphrase the great Vince Lombardi, it’s about chasing perfection, knowing that we will never attain it, while remaining confident that “we shall catch excellence” in the process.
To quote another great coach, John Wooden, “if you don’t have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it again?”
Join us this week on A Time to Sharpen...2024-03-2145 minA Time to SharpenClothes Make the ManMark Twain once said, “Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence in society.”
Join us this week on A Time To Sharpen, as we discuss the importance of our clothing choices. They say a lot, fairly or unfairly, about who we are. This is especially true with teenagers, whose entire identity is sometimes built around name brands. How do we as parents, teachers, and counselors help them to find the balance between dressing like a slob on one hand, and using expensive apparel to disguise their low self-esteem on the other.
Clothin...2024-02-2845 minA Time to SharpenArt is not OptionalIn the academic world, we sometimes refer to Art as an “elective,” intentionally or unintentionally implying that it is not necessary. At Whetstone, we believe that nothing is farther from the truth.
From music and film, to painting and poetry, we try to incorporate Art on a weekly if not daily basis to teach lessons about life and our relationship with the “Creator” or the Universe.
Join us this week on A Time To Sharpen as we shoot the breeze with Alex Ruschi, former mentoring specialist at Whetstone, and current artist extraordinaire! Alex is a gifted scul...2024-02-1444 minA Time to SharpenStuckWe’ve all been stuck in the mud. Even Brandon, with his vast array of man-skills, has found himself up his axles in mud a time or two…or maybe it's just the one time. My point is that it happens to the best of us. There is no shame in getting stuck. It happens to anyone who is out there trying to make things happen.
It’s what we do once we’re stuck in the mud that matters. Get down on ourselves? Wallow in it? Pretend it’s not there? Hit the accelerator as hard as we can i...2024-01-2935 minA Time to Sharpen30,000 FeetGoals are good. I have nothing against goals.
My dad gives all of his kids, grandkids, and in-laws $100 bucks every time the New Year rolls around for making a set of long term and short term goals. I used to teach my English students how to make SMART goals, and assign them as homework. You might remember we talked about this very thing one year ago.
But lately, I’ve started to think there is something that needs to happen first, before we start jotting down all of our dreams and making what often turns out...2024-01-1644 minA Time to SharpenFathers & SonsFathers and sons. Mother and daughters. For some reason, these relationships seem fraught with conflict. Is this because we would never separate from our parents if the relationship was too good? Maybe.
Is it because the devil knows if he can attack the family at this point, he will do damage to the greatest safeguard against evil known to man? Definitely. That’s what I would do if I were the devil.
Join us this week on A Time to Sharpen as we talk with Gary Tucker (aka “Papa Tuck”) and his son Keaton, who “headlined”...2023-12-141h 03A Time to SharpenGratitudeDuring chapel on Thursday mornings at Whetstone, we practice the art of gratitude. We take about 15 minutes to write down 10 things that we are each grateful for, and then we read them out loud. The best ones get transferred to neon colored sticky notes which are then placed upon one of the 5 big white doors that line the schoolroom. We try to focus on the people and relationships in our lives, as well as events that have happened in the last week…because the science of happiness supports this approach.
Today, there are over 1,000 of these notes, ea...2023-11-2241 minA Time to SharpenSarcasmThe word sarcasm is descended from a Greek word which literally means “to strip off the flesh” - as in with a knife, or with one’s teeth. It is a violent word.
We don’t think of it in these terms nowadays, but perhaps we should. The damage that we inflict on others with our sarcastic language is no less painful. In fact, it might be much more so when we examine the big picture.
Join us this time on A Time to Sharpen as we examine the use and misuse of sarcasm in our work w...2023-11-0740 minA Time to SharpenTable MannersSit up straight. Elbows off the table. Don’t chew with your mouth open.
We’ve heard this advice since we were little, and we’ve probably passed it on to the next generation. Why? Because table manners are important.
Table manners show respect for other people. They communicate that we care about others and that we are willing to put their interests and comfort before our own.
This is one of the first steps in a young person's moral development. There is a lot of training for life that occurs during dinner.
On t...2023-10-2545 minA Time to SharpenA Time to Say NoTwo little letters: “n” and “o.”
They shouldn’t be so hard to say, but there are times when it’s just so much easier to take the path of least resistance. We grow weary of the struggle.
And teenagers have a way of wearing you down. Am I right, or am I right?
Join us this week on for a friendly discussion about if, when, and how to say “no” to our kids. It ain’t easy, but if you don’t have this tool in your belt, you’ll never build (or repair) your relation...2023-10-0746 minA Time to SharpenMeant 2B OutdoorsHave you ever felt that something was “meant to be?” Like that time you opened a pack of baseball cards and there, lying on the very top, was a 1989 Upper Deck Ken Griffey, Jr. rookie card? Maybe the clouds parted and a beam of light encircled the card while angelic music flooded the room.
That card was meant to be yours…until you traded it to your brother for a Billy Ripken error card. Anyways, you get my point. There are times in life when we feel, deep inside, that we meant to do something, meet some person...2023-09-131h 18A Time to SharpenYouth MinistryBrandon tells us at the beginning of each podcast that the ensuing conversation will help us to become better teachers, better counselors, better parents…better people. I always like hearing him say it. Because first of all it reminds me of who our intended audience is, and that’s important when you’re doing a podcast. And second because it reminds me that I am all three. All adults, whether it’s their occupation or not, whether they have children of their own or not, serve in each of these capacities at some point to some person.
Take you...2023-09-0148 minA Time to SharpenThe Power of MusicMusic is the universal language. It crosses the boundaries of culture, gender, age, and race. It speaks to us before we have the words to understand language; and it continues speaking to us even if we lose this ability in old age.
At Whetstone Boys Ranch, we use music to make meaningful connections to our boys. Among other things, we use it to help them cope with emotions, to teach life lessons, and to challenge assumptions. In a word, we are “intentional” - mainly because it is such a powerful and potentially harmful tool.
Join us th...2023-08-1339 min
The Meant 2B Outdoors Podcast”Keep Showing Up” with Whetstone Boys Ranch Co-Founders Axel and BrandonIn this episode we sit down with Axel Liimatta and Brandon Maxwell, co-founders of Whetstone Boys Ranch. These men have a passion for developing boys who have lost all hope because of life's difficult circumstances. Utilizing a ranch setting, the outdoors, and God, they build relationships that transform lives. The story of this ranch and the men that run it will leave you inspired.
2023-07-201h 28A Time to SharpenHome...but not AloneAt least once during a boy’s stay at Whetstone, he will return home for an entire week to test out what he has learned about living with his family. As you can imagine, the boys and parents look forward to this time which comes after months of separation. On the other hand, it is a source of much anxiety…for both parties. Will things be any better than they were?
The answer is always yes, and no. Many things have changed to be sure, and distance usually makes the heart grow fonder - but we should expec...2023-07-0638 minA Time to SharpenAircraft Carriers“I feel the need…the need for speed.” This iconic Tom Cruise line in Top Gun accurately describes the drive that many teenagers feel while they work to create space between their parents and themselves. They want freedom and independence, and they can’t get it fast enough. Parents, on the other hand, bear the responsibility of slowing things down by asking important questions about safety, direction, and destination. This process is normal and healthy.
But with adopted children, the need for speed is combined with the urge to constantly “buzz the tower.” They can’t seem to resist doing...2023-06-1643 minA Time to SharpenThe Myth of Quality TimeTwice a year, Whetstone Boys Ranch hosts a father-son retreat here in Mountain View, Missouri. Dads travel from all over the country to spend a weekend with their son. They join other dads who work here, along with our counseling team, for a series of guided activities and adventures designed to get everyone talking - talking about expectations, perspectives, frustrations, hopes, and fears. There were many takeaways from this year’s retreat, which was led by Matt Foster and Katie Johnston. There were so many in fact, that we’ll have to break this into two pods. The first is c...2023-06-0342 minA Time to SharpenClose QuartersSummer is coming. The kids are going to be underfoot for the next three months, and there is nowhere to hide. If you home school, you might be thinking, “get on my level,” but for most families the next few weeks can be a very stressful transition. Everyone is excited about vacation and free time, but these things are a double-edged sword. At some point, the lack of structure usually starts to get on everyone’s nerves, and the tension starts to climb alongside the temperature.
On this episode of A Time to Sharpen, we’ll...2023-05-1838 minA Time to SharpenPaying AttentionGod is never not communicating with us. If we can’t hear him, it’s not His fault. We need to pay closer attention to the signs and signals he unceasingly sends us, taking time to reflect in contemplation and conversation.
On this episode of A Time to Sharpen, we will discuss how God speaks to us through our kids, students, or anyone in our care. It behooves us to learn how to listen to what they are telling us through their actions, not just their words. 2023-05-0337 minA Time to SharpenYouth-Driven CultureElvis. Chuck Berry. The Beatles.
Young people flocked to hear them sing. Boys and girls bought their records by the millions, lined their rooms with posters, and toted lunch boxes with their image to school. Young men dressed like them, moved like them, and wore their hair like them. Young women swooned at their feet.
Corporate America took note. The money-making machine went into high gear and created an entire class of people that didn’t really exist before then: the “teenager.” Popular culture has never been the same.
Today...2023-04-1341 minA Time to SharpenThe New KidWe’ve all been the new kid on the block.
We all know what it feels like to have “all eyes on you.” You’re in a fish bowl, and there is no way out. The faces of people around you are exaggerated by the strange curved glass that distorts your view of them and traps you inside their gaze.
At Whetstone Boys Ranch, we have a boy, or two, or three going through this experience every month, and it’s our responsibility to make them feel welcome, loved, seen, and heard.
It’s not easy, bu...2023-03-2829 minA Time to SharpenCelebrate SuccessChange usually happens slowly. Our minds and our bodies are not capable of handling too much all at once. It’s actually kind of unhealthy.
Yes, there are baptisms of fire, and God can pull off a ‘road to Damascus moment’ any time he desires, but these seem to be the exception.
At Whetstone, graduations are a time to publicly celebrate the change that has occurred within a young man over many months. They are also a reminder that whatever change occurs in his future will also take time. It will not all be smooth sailin...2023-03-0635 minA Time to SharpenMentoringWe cannot underestimate the power of mentors in our lives. None of us has the power of will to make it on our own.
We are not strong enough, smart enough, or good-looking enough. When we are teenagers, we THINK we are, but within a few short years (years that don’t feel short at the time) most of us realize our own folly.
As John Wayne is credited as saying, “Life is hard. It’s harder if you’re stupid.”
At their most basic level, mentors help us to not be stupid. This might...2023-02-1639 minA Time to SharpenMaking SMARTr GoalsA mental note is a lost note. A short pencil is better than a long memory. If you aim at nothing, you’ll hit it every time.
That last quote is from Zig Ziglar. The first two my dad told me growing up…like…every day. They were drilled into my soul. “You have to write things down,” he’d say, “or it’s never gonna happen.” This is backed up by countless studies. I don’t know if successful people tend to write things down, or if writing things down makes you successful, but it doesn’t really matter which...2023-01-1932 minA Time to SharpenEnough is EnoughTiming is everything. This is true in so many areas of life. It’s true with hitting a curveball. It’s true about making a joke and about offering words of wisdom. It’s true about investing in crypto…boy, is it true about investing in crypto!
It’s also true when considering the right time to send a son or daughter to a therapeutic boarding school. Wait too long, and you’ll lose the window that you have to make an impact. Send them too soon, and you risk communicating that you don’t care enough to keep trying...2022-12-2936 minA Time to SharpenThe Struggle is RealThe story of Gideon has some serious ups and downs. He trusts God and then he doesn’t. And then he does. And then God decides that Gideon doesn’t trust Him enough. So God reduces the size of Gideon’s army from 32,000 to 300, “lest Israel” according to the Biblical account, “claim glory for itself…saying, ‘My own hand has saved me.’”
It seems that God orchestrates our circumstances at times, so that He will be glorified, not us. He makes it impossible for us to conclude that the goodness in our life results from anything other than his love and gr...2022-12-0740 minA Time to SharpenBorn to RunWe are born to run. The human body is built for it – it’s a biomechanical miracle, allowing all of our muscles, bones, and joints to move in synchronization. Little children can do it all day long without being trained how or told why.
As we get older, we become more interested in speed and utility. We see it as a means to end. We compare ourselves to others. Our bodies break down. Eventually, for most, it starts to cause pain. The pure joy of running gets pushed farther and farther from our mind.
The Bibl...2022-11-1833 minA Time to SharpenA Ram in the ThicketJehovah Jirah! “The Lord Provides.”
People of the book like to say this, sometimes without thinking. It’s a nice thought to adorn a coffee mug or a t-shirt. Maybe we have a bumper sticker that proclaims it.
Nothing wrong with any of this, but there is a danger that its ubiquity strips it of its power. It can become cliché, and as such, something we can take or leave.
But when Abraham was suddenly and miraculously relieved from the responsibility of sacrificing his only son, Isaac, he didn’t use it in a way that...2022-11-0234 minA Time to SharpenNo Place Like HomeThere’s no place like home. Seriously, there is no place like it for tension, and fighting, and feeling like you’ll never measure up.
Home is not always the healing balm that God intended it to be. At times it is a battlefield, pitting husband against wife, parent against child, brother against sister. There are tangled barbed wire lines we’re not supposed to cross, and buried landmines that we know nothing about. It is a feat, some evenings, to even survive the ordeal of dinner.
All of us feel this way sometimes. It’s normal...2022-10-1333 minA Time to SharpenBack to SchoolIt’s that time of year again. Time to buy new shoes for the kids, and a Trapper Keeper, and a fresh pack of unsharpened pencils…or mechanical pencils if that’s how you roll. It’s also time to fill in the spreadsheet with data about who needs to be where and when along with what. And time to figure out a way to pay for it all.
It's stressful for everyone. And for families that are already struggling, going back to school can be the straw that breaks the camel’s back.
On this episo...2022-09-2234 minA Time to SharpenFaithful with LittleThe Bible says that “whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much.” Maybe that’s why we don’t take surly teenagers home from the hospital as new parents. Most of us get a few years to learn the ropes through sleep deprivation, and diaper changes, and playdates. We have few years to grow into the role of being responsible for another human being. God usually gives us something small to take care of before entrusting us with something big.
At Whetstone Boys Ranch, this verse perfectly expresses our core values of responsi...2022-09-0831 minA Time to SharpenPicking your Battles, Part 2So we’ve established there is a time to quit. We have laid the groundwork of humility and wisdom that needs to prevail in those stressful moments of conflict with our teenagers. We know that maintaining the relationship is more important than winning every battle.
But what’s next? What is our exit strategy? How do we drop the rope without abdicating our responsibilities as parents, teachers, and counselors?
Can Chris Farley and David Spade in Tommy Boy provide us a roadmap for success?
Spoiler Alert: the answer…is yes!2022-08-1832 minA Time to SharpenPicking your Battles, Part 1“Winners never quit; and quitters never win.” Or so the old saying goes. But I think we can all admit that there is a time to reassess our situation. You might call it “charging in another direction”, or “changing gears,” or “hitting the reset button,” but whatever metaphor you choose, the fact remains that sticking with the original plan is sometimes the epitome of foolishness.
The tricky thing is knowing when to quit. When have we moved from perseverance into stubbornness? Sometimes as parents, teachers, and counselors, we let our pride get the best of us. We dig in and plant...2022-07-2927 min
A Time to SharpenAftercareWhetstone is a 6-12 program, meaning that most boys who graduate do so within that timeframe. We also have many boys who are here for far less time, who don’t graduate. Regardless, we try to keep in touch with all of them – whether through social media, phone calls, letters, texts, their parents, word of mouth, etc.
Every boy who has spent a single day here is a part of our large and unorthodox family. We love them all, whether their time here was considered a “success” or not. But what kind of aftercare do we provide, someone...2022-07-0440 minA Time to SharpenAdventure WeekThree times a year at Whetstone Boys Ranch, in the Spring, Summer, and Fall, we take our boys on a week-long adventure in the Ozarks. It’s a lot of work to plan, order supplies, rearrange schedules, pack, and then travel hundreds of miles in a van with all of our equipment. But once we’re there, and we’ve set up camp, we remember that it’s always worth the effort. Lifelong memories are made. Relationships are born and strengthened. And God, well, He’s everywhere. All we had to do was show up.
On this podcast, B...2022-06-1040 minA Time to SharpenMore CowbellYou’ve seen it on a bumper sticker. You’ve probably seen a meme or a gif. Maybe it’s popped up on a slide during a sermon on Sunday morning:
“More Cowbell!”
Just 2 words, but their impact is, dare I say, profound. One for the ages!
Just in case you’ve been living under a rock for the last 20 years, it’s from a classic Saturday Night Live skit, starring the great Will Ferrell.
I can’t even begin to describe how hilarious it is, so if you haven’t seen it recently...2022-05-2039 minA Time to SharpenCowboy Up!America has a complicated relationship with cowboys.
We could argue about the reasons why and what these reasons tell us about ourselves, but one thing is for sure: everyone seems to like Danny Glover’s portrayal of Joshua Deets in the television miniseries, Lonesome Dove. Rarely has a fictional character demonstrated such “splendid behavior,” to quote the book by Larry McMurtry and the film.
On this episode of A Time to Sharpen, we discuss Deets with Ty Lewis, our current agricultural director and a former house parent at Whetstone Boys Ranch. What can this iconic charac...2022-05-0540 minA Time to SharpenUse Your WordsWords, according to Albus Dumbledore, are “our most inexhaustible source of magic - capable of inflicting injury and remedying it.”
Nowhere is this more true than in therapy. One might even argue that it is impossible to heal past wounds without assigning them meaning through language.
It’s not exactly magic, but learning how to communicate is like crossing an invisible bridge you never knew existed.
For this episode of “A Time to Sharpen,” we invited one of our first graduates to speak with us about this topic. He credits this skill, which he honed a...2022-04-191h 10A Time to SharpenGood MedicineThere is no script for how to help a struggling teenager. To paraphrase the 18th century Scottish poet Robert Burns, “the best laid plans of mice and men often go wrong.”
Or as the late 20th century American philosopher, Mike Tyson, once said, “Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth.”
Whetstone Boys Ranch can’t tell you what to do when your son or daughter is spiraling out of control. We can however, provide some guidance that will keep you from doing the same. And it starts with a good old fashioned...2022-03-2946 minA Time to SharpenBread upon the WatersKing Solomon said that if we cast our “bread” upon the waters, we will find it after many days. Something tells me he wasn’t extolling the virtues of soggy toast…although a good piece of sop with a beefy stew is one of greatest pleasures in this life. That and a nice MLT, to quote Miracle Max from The Princess Bride - mutton, lettuce, and tomato sandwich, where the mutton is nice and lean and the tomatoes are ripe.
No, I’m pretty sure “bread upon the waters” is a metaphor. But what does it mean? And how can we...2022-03-0928 min